Course Listing Unavailable (14 page short horror in pdf format) by James Barron

An ambitious student signs up for an internship program promising real world, hands-on experience. Who knew bloodthirsty demons would be involved?

For today’s youth, the challenge of getting a good job has never been tougher. Many are determined to do anything that will enhance their resumes in the eyes of employers. Taking “useful” classes, getting internships, and doing extra-curricular activities are just a few examples of what diligent individuals do to spruce up that valuable sheet of paper.

The protagonist in Course Listing Unavailable, 17-year-old Gortat Emmanuel, is just another determined Ivy League freshman with a whiff of intelligent innocence about him. A mix-up in paying the tuition has meant he’s one class short of the minimum semester credit, and so he sees a counselor to get into a subject that appeals to him.

But every time the counselor enters the course he wants, there’s a problem.

Organic Chemistry? Unavailable. Biology? Unavailable. Ecology? Yup… unavailable. As a last resort, the advisor offers Gortat a chance for some real world experience: a month shadowing a service professional. Because the last guy who did it dropped out.

That’s all the information available. Apart from a name: Mr Shephard. Despite this, Gortat accepts, still eager to learn. And so on his first day, he’s dressed up as if he’s the President attending their inauguration.

However, Gortat’s destination isn’t as beautiful as the White House. Unless you’re into dilapidated buildings and tales of wasted lives in needle format littering the ground.

And the professional isn’t some smarmy doctor. Turning up in a classic American muscle with uninviting objects abundantly decorating the interior, Max Shephard invites Gortat in for his “education”. There’s no textbooks. No worksheets either. There’s only one rule, and it ain’t a typical one:

            Max
…no matter what happens
you will not puke in this car.

This may sound easy enough to obey until Max’s profession is revealed…demon hunter. Not quite what our Ivy League kid was expecting. In addition, it transpires that the supposed dropout dropped out of life…unwillingly. Oh, and for his first day on the job, he’s got to complete a practical helping Max eradicate the beast responsible for failing the previous student. Turns out “real world experience” means “other world experience” in this case.

Will Gortat pass his practical? Will he break the one rule? Will he even survive? Only one thing’s assured: direct this one well, and judges at film festivals will be giving you full marks!

Budget: Okay, there’s a bit of FX involved in here. But nothing a skilled director can’t – and won’t want to – tackle!

About the writer: James loves to write comedy and action along with the occasional horror short. You can reach him at jbarron021 (a) gmail.

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This screenplay may not be used or reproduced for any purpose including educational purposes without the expressed written permission of the author.

About the reviewer: Hamish Porter is a writer who, if he was granted one wish, would ask for the skill of being able to write dialogue like Tarantino. Or maybe the ability to teleport. Nah, that’s nothing compared to the former. A lover of philosophy, he’s working on several shorts and a sporting comedy that can only be described as “quintessentially British”. If you want to contact him, he can be emailed: hamishdonaldp (a) gmail. If you’d like to contact him and be subjected to incoherent ramblings, follow him on Twitter @HamishP95.