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THE LUNCHROOM Episode Two "Life's Too Short" Teleplay by Bruce Snyder Story by Bruce Snyder & Alan Holman Created by Bruce Snyder EXECUTIVE PRODUCER Bruce Snyder EXECUTIVE PRODUCER Vincent Biga EXECUTIVE PRODUCER Edward Drogos STORY EDITOR Rebecca Parker CAST LIST Will Cooper................................. Joel Mayberry............................... Brian Vandele............................... Brock Warner................................ Reicther.................................... Casey Jennings.............................. Chris Hughes................................ Ellen Conner................................ Cathy Matthews.............................. Mr. John Parker............................. Ms. Diane Ballard........................... GUEST CAST LIST Principal Bob Stevens....................... Nadine Santos............................... Mr. Harry Zimmer............................ Arthur Winchester........................... Cashier #1.................................. Cashier #2.................................. Cashier #3.................................. Copyright © Bruce Snyder TEASER FADE IN: INT. SCHOOL - PARKING LOT - AFTER SCHOOL The lot is completely empty except for one beat up green car. BRIAN VANDELE is in it. On the hood of the car sits CASEY JENNINGS. Brian seems very angry and impatient. BRIAN Casey, get off my car! CASEY Not until you apologize! BRIAN For Christ's sake it was only a pop tart! CASEY WRONG! It wasn't just a pop tart, it was MY pop tart! BRIAN C'mon! You've been sitting on my car for an hour now! I'd like to go home! CASEY Apologize or get me another pop tart! Brian sighs. BRIAN Fuck this! Brian puts it in drive. Casey becomes worried. CASEY What are you doing? BRIAN What's it look like I'm doing? I'm getting you off my car. Brian begins to back up his car. Casey, scared, jumps off of the car. Brian backs up so fast that he backs into RICHARD, the wheelchair kid knocking him to the ground. Casey is frozen. While Brian hops out of the car and checks on Richard. BRIAN Richard, are you okay?! Beat. RICHARD I...I can't feel my legs! Long pause. Richard starts laughing while Brian lets out a sigh of relief. BRIAN Son of a bitch! SMASH CUT TO: † OPENING CREDIT SEQUENCE: Marvin Gaye's "Ain't That Peculiar" plays over the credits. AFTER CREDITS: FADE IN: INT. SCHOOL HALLWAY - NOON ELLEN CONNER is walking down the halls looking around for Will. She has two tickets in her hands. She turns a corner. CUT TO: INT. ANOTHER HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS JOEL MAYBERRY and CATHY MATTHEWS stand by a locker. Joel is searching through it, trying to find his science book. Cathy is staring off into space, rubbing her stomach. Ellen appears and runs up to them. ELLEN Hey, either of you guys seen Will? JOEL Um. I think he's in the teen center getting a coke. ELLEN Thanks. Ellen leaves. Joel resumes his conversation with Cathy. JOEL So how about we get some pizza tonight for dinner? No response. JOEL Cathy? CATHY Yeah? JOEL You okay? CATHY Yep. Just lost in thought. JOEL First you'll crazy and all over the place, now you've been quiet and down in the dumps. Are you sure everything is okay? CATHY Trust me Joel, there is absolutely nothing wrong with me. Joel closes his locker and gives her a suspicious look. CATHY Don't give me that look. It's a very unflattering look. They walk off. CUT TO: INT. TEEN CENTER - SCHOOL - SECONDS LATER Ellen enters, still searching. She takes a few steps and freezes. Across the teen center, is WILL COOPER and he is talking to NADINE SANTOS. Nadine is a Mexican American. She's very slender, with long curly brown hair. Overall she's a very beautiful young woman. Ellen seems taken aback by this. Very hurt at the fact that Will is getting friendly with another woman. Ellen turns around and gets ready to leave but Will stops her. WILL Hey, Ellen. Slowly turns around. ELLEN (uncomfortable) Hi Will. WILL Come on over. Ellen makes her way over. WILL What's up? ELLEN Nothing much. (beat) ...Who's this. WILL Oh, I forgot. Ellen, this is Nadine Santos. NADINE Hello, pleased to meet you. They shakes hands. ELLEN (under breath) Wish I could say the same. NADINE What? ELLEN I said "likewise." WILL You'll never believe this, Ellen but Nadine wants to be a filmmaker too. This crushes Ellen more. ELLEN ...Really? NADINE I just love movies so much. It's my sole passion. I couldn't picture my life without them. WILL Me either. Give each other a loving look. Ellen gets worried and tries to break the moment. ELLEN Banana hammock! Both turn to Ellen with weird looks. ELLEN (embarrassed) Sorry. WILL Did you need something Ellen? ELLEN Oh, I just wanted to tell you I got two tickets to the new Scorsese movie. I thought we could check it out. Will and Nadine both look at each other. Obvious that they have bad news for her. ELLEN What? What's the matter? WILL Oh, I'm really sorry but...I already agreed to go with Nadine. Another crushing blow for Ellen. NADINE I'm sorry Ellen. Will, you should go with her. I don't mind sitting this one out. ELLEN No, it's okay. You two should go. You've already made plans. NADINE Are you sure? ELLEN You got to him first. I hold no grudge for that. ELLEN (V/O) You bitch! Will peaks up at the clock. WILL Shit! Look at the time. We've got to get to Media Arts class. NADINE You're right. It was nice meeting you Ellen. They walk away. WILL See ya', Ellen! They disappear around the corner. Ellen seems depressed and defeated. ELLEN Stupid friend zone. FADE TO: INT. HALLWAY - SCIENCE WING - MINUTES LATER It's empty and quiet. Suddenly large amounts of black smoke start coming out of the teachers lounge at the end of the hall. Not only that but we can hear a few screams and some materials breaking. Door finally opens and a few teachers run out. Seconds later, MR. JOHN PARKER, MS. DIANE BALLARD, and MR. HARRY ZIMMER emerge coughing and swatting smoke away from them. PARKER Damn it, Harry! What the hell were you thinking! ZIMMER I thought the stove was broken. I was just checking it out. PARKER It doesn't mean you should light a match to check it out when you have the gas on! Ya' ball sack. BALLARD Why hasn't any pulled the alarm yet? Ballard runs over to the wall and pulls the FIRE ALARM. CUT TO: INT. SCHOOL - HALLWAY - SAME The fire alarm is blaring at a very loud volume. Classroom doors begin to open and HUNDREDS OF STUDENTS file out and begin to walk out of the building. In the middle of the hallway we can see some teachers directing the students one where to go. CUT TO: EXT. SCHOOL PARKING LOT - MINUTES LATER Students are standing around in the parking lot. More come out of the school and wait around with the rest. While they pile out, we can see smoke coming off the far east side of the building. A FIRETRUCK can be heard approaching. Near the far back of the students is The Gang. REICTHER, JOEL MAYBERRY, BRIAN VANDELE, BROCK WARNER, CASEY JENNINGS, and CHRIS HUGHES are all standing around the parking lot. There are dozens upon dozens of other students near by but The Gang is standing in itís own little area away from everyone else. Brock appears to be very anxious. BROCK This fire drill better be worth it. I'm missing out on finishing my project for this. BRIAN I think so. Look that smoke is coming from somewhere. CHRIS Holy shit! The school is actually on fire. While The Gang watches in amazement Joel notices that Reicther has brought a newspaper with him. JOEL Why did you bring that out here? REICTHER So I could read my comics while we wait. Reicther begins to read. After a long pause he starts laughing. REICTHER Oh "Family Circus", how you slay me. Joel rolls his eyes. EXT. SCHOOL - MAIN ENTRANCE - SAME PRINCIPAL BOB STEVENS is standing on top of the main steps, addressing the entire TEACHING STAFF. Parker and Ballard are near the front, with Mr. Zimmer right behind them. STEVENS All right! I just finished talking with the fire chief. Apparently the science wing has suffered very major damages. Zimmer looks embarrassed. STEVENS So big of damages that when I was given a rough estimate of how much it was cost to repair, I was so shocked I about shit out my heart. It only got worse when I mentioned that the teacher's lounge was burned up too and then he tacked on a couple thousand more. I swear people, after that I think I honestly suffered a mild stroke. PARKER That would explain the excess drooling, wouldn't it Bob? Stevens shots him a mean look. STEVENS I have found a way to pay for it... by firing the idiot who started the fire. Zimmer gulps. STEVENS One year's salary should cover most of the costs. So now I must ask: which one of you incompetent dim wits lit my school on fire! Long pause. STEVENS I'll ask again...who's responsible for burning part of my school! PARKER (whispering) Don't worry, Harry. I've got your back. Short silence followed by: VOICE 1 (O.S.) Zimmer did it! VOICE 2 (O.S.) I saw him do it! VOICE 3 (O.S.) He burned the science wing! VOICE 4 (O.S.) And stole my lunch! Stevens gives Zimmer an evil look. Parker pats Zimmer on the back. PARKER Sorry pal. You got fucked five way till Sunday. Zimmer drops his head in embarrassment. TIME FADE: EXT. SCHOOL - PARKING LOT - LATER TITLE CARD: "90 Minutes Later" The Gang is standing around, obviously bored out of their minds. Reicther is still reading his newspaper. Brock is standing around, looking impatient and wanting to be somewhere else. Chris singing to himself. Casey and Brian are in the middle of a conversation that Joel is paying very close attention to. CASEY Yeah, he could do the robot. Casey does a very crappy version of the robot dance. Brian scoffs, Joel cracks up. JOEL You are so lame. CASEY No, it's funny. BRIAN It's not realistic. CASEY It's supposed to be how a robot would dance. What's not realistic about it? BRIAN So a robot programmed well enough to have a dance function would do what you just did... CASEY Probably. BRIAN If they were to program a robot human enough to have a dance function it would have to be incredibly advanced and I don't think an incredibly advanced life-like robot would be programmed with such stiff moves. They would almost certainly give him at least slightly groovier moves. JOEL I think you're thinking of a super advanced robot. I mean, I think Casey's just talking about, like, a robot that appears in the next decade. Brock grunts in frustration. CHRIS What's eating him? CASEY He's mad that you don't realize I have mad skills as a dancer. BROCK I can't believe I'm missing my homework for this. Reicther makes a gasping sound and drops his jaw in excitement. REICTHER Holy crap! Everyone stops what they're doing and turn to him. JOEL What? REICTHER According to this article the AMC theatre in Richmond is showing all six Star Wars movies in a row! BRIAN When? Reicther looks for the date. REICTHER (disappointed) Today! Everyone groans and moans. BROCK Ah man. CASEY A once in a lifetime opportunity like this and we're stuck at school. CHRIS When did it start? REICTHER Eight in the morning. CHRIS (looking at watch) Damn it! Anakin should be turning to the dark side right about now. JOEL (disappointed) Man. BRIAN (disappointed) This is exact proof that God hates my very being. (yelling to the sky) Why must you tease me you sick son of a bitch! CHRIS I'd give anything to see it. BROCK Yeah but what can we do? We're stuck here. Long beat. Reicther is hit with an idea. REICTHER Maybe we CAN make it. BROCK Didn't you hear me? We're stuck in school. REICTHER Well, Brock there IS an easy solution that problem: we should ditch school. BRIAN Ditch school? REICTHER Yeah. Look the teachers have already taken head count, so they think were here. All we have to do is sneak away when everyone starts heading in. BROCK I don't know about this guys. Should we really skip school? BRIAN Well it's nearly noon so the school day is already half over. Everyone nods. REICTHER Plus when's the last time we did anything that was both dangerous and fun? Life's too short to be living a life on the straight and narrow. I say we need to live a little. Not just for ourselves but for Lando and for Han, and for that whiny, emo wanna be teen known as Anakin! Everyone seems to be getting excited about this plan, except for Brock who still seems reluctant. JOEL I'm in! I've always wanted to see it on the big screen. Beat. BRIAN Miss school AND see Star Wars? No question about it, I'm in. Beat. CASEY AMC theatre...isn't that the place with the bottomless popcorn tubs? REICTHER I think so. CASEY I'm in! Beat. CHRIS Since I don't want to be left out, I'm going to give into peer pressure. I'm in! Beat. They all look at Brock. BROCK This is crazy. They're going to catch us. REICTHER What's the worse that can happen? They suspend us from going to any sporting event? Or stop us from going to homecoming? They all laugh. BROCK All right, all right. I'll go. But someone has to pay for my ticket. BRIAN I got your back. JOEL Should someone tell Will? CHRIS He's a bit preoccupied at the moment. They all look to their right. A ways down we can see Will talking with Nadine. VOICE (O.S.) All right. Everyone can go back to class. REICTHER Now's our chance. Quick behind those pick ups! Hundreds of students begin to make their way back into the school. The Gang go the opposite way and hide behind a series of cars. A few minutes go by and all the students have returned to the school. The Gang pop their heads out to check to see if the coast is clear. REICTHER All right, let's do it! Begin Operation Lando! They all cheer. BRIAN Wait. Who's car are we taking? Beat. BRIAN Not it! JOEL Not it! CASEY Not it! REICTHER Not it! BROCK Not it! Chris Not - DAMN IT! REICTHER Chris' van it is. They begin to make their way toward the van, all very excited. CUT TO: INT. SCHOOL - HALLWAY - MINUTES LATER Ellen is walking down the hallway, very down on herself. Cathy appears out of nowhere, looking around. CATHY Ellen, have you seen Joel? It's like he's disappeared. ELLEN (sad) No. CATHY Hey what's wrong with you? You look super depressed. ELLEN There is no such thing as depression. Just anger without any enthusiasm. Cathy giggles. After a beat, Ellen gives in. ELLEN Will's met a girl. CATHY So what? I met lots of girls. ELLEN Not one like this girl. She's funny, she's gorgeous. She likes everything that Will likes. It's like God is purposely trying to make impossible for me to have him all by myself. CATHY Aw, Ellen. Hard to believe. Under all that condescending wit and tough girl exterior...your just a big softie. Ellen rolls her eyes. CATHY I'm sure you have nothing to worry about. The one thing I've noticed about Will is that he values you a great deal. No girl can take him away from you. Suddenly Nadine passes by. NADINE Hey, Ellen. ELLEN (grumpy) Hi Nadine. Cathy is stunned. CATHY That had to be the picture of absolute beauty. Ellen hits her. ELLEN Cathy, that's the girl. Cathy's eyes get big. She's surprised and feels sorry for Ellen. CATHY Well...at least you have your personality. ELLEN (sarcastically) Thanks. Big help. Cathy smiles and leaves. Ellen continues to walk only to be stopped by a very happy Will. WILL Beautiful day, isn't Ellen? ELLEN I guess. Beat. ELLEN You seem extra chipper. WILL What can I say? I just made a really good new friend. ELLEN Yeah that Nadine girl does seem to be quite the catch. WILL I guess. I mean she's funny, she's smart. Beautiful... (trails off) Ellen pokes him to snap out of it. WILL For some reason I'm still not convinced. ELLEN Your hard to please. WILL What can I say. I have very high standards. ELLEN Didn't you date a girl who was pregnant? WILL You couldn't be more wrong... (embarrassed) ...she had already had the kid. ELLEN She had a baby? Oh Will. Haven't you ever heard three's a crowd? WILL Have you ever heard that you sound smarter when you don't talk? ELLEN Constantly. I'm considering adopting it as my new motto. Beat. WILL I just wish I could find out what's important in her life. Nadine appears. NADINE Will! You're not going to believe this. Kirk found the first "Batman" comic ever hidden in the library reference section! This is the coolest thing that's ever happened! She leaves with Will chasing after her. Ellen is more hurt. CUT TO: EXT. CHRIS' VAN - LATER Establishing shot. It's driving down an empty city road. CUT TO: INT. CHRIS' VAN - CONTINUOUS Chris is driving and Brian is in the passenger seat. Casey and Reicther are in the very back, while Joel and Brock are in the middle section of the van. Reicther sighs. REICTHER How much further? CHRIS Almost there. Joel looks over at Brock and notices that Brock has put on a pair of sunglasses and a hat he found from the floor. JOEL What the hell is up with your new look? BROCK I'm trying my hardest to be incognito. I don't want to be caught skipping school. CHRIS You know in this light you kinda look like a paler version of OJ Simpson, Brock. BROCK Is he football player or the murderer. BRIAN He's more of the later then the former. Casey giggles. CASEY Wee! Watch what I can do! Casey starts to bounce up and down, shaking the whole car. CUT TO: EXT. CHRIS' VAN - CONTINUOUS The Van is bouncing up and down, hitting the road causing sparks to fly everywhere. CUT TO: INT. CHRIS' VAN - CONTINUOUS Joel and Brock turn around and try to force Casey to stop bouncing. REICTHER Hey that looks like fun! Reicther starts to bounce too. Casey breaks free of Brock and Joel and starts bouncing too. CUT TO: EXT. CHRIS' VAN - CONTINUOUS The Van bounces even more before causing more sparks and the bumper to come off all of a sudden. CUT TO: INT. CHRIS' VAN - CONTINUOUS Joel (grabbing Reicther) and Brock (holding onto Casey) force them to stop. Even after they've been stopped, Casey and Reicther still giggle like little school children. JOEL (sighing) I've got stupid in stereo. Chris tries to see the damages from his side mirror. CHRIS Shit! This van is brand new! BRIAN Maybe in 1981 it was. Reicther and Casey are start jumping up and down again. CHRIS So help me God I will turn this van around and go right back to school if you don't stop! They stop. REICTHER He started it. CHRIS Well I'm ending it. Long pause. BRIAN You guys wanna play "Would you rather?" JOEL Anything to end this awkward silence. BRIAN All right would you rather...be an auto mechanic or die of breast cancer? Joel, Chris, and Brock give horrified looks. REICTHER & CASEY (same time) Cancer! REICHTER Jinx! Ha! You can't talk until you get me a coke. Casey is confused. CASEY Bu - JOEL (overlapping) Sorry Case. He's right. Your not allowed to talk until you get him a soda. Thems the rules. CHRIS Here we are. THE GANG'S POV: Their looking a run down theatre with chipped paint and faded walls. Brock is disgusted. BROCK God it looks dilapidated. REICTHER Hey, you say dilapidated I saw it's small and cozy. They begin to get out of the van. CUT TO: INT. SCHOOL - HALLWAY - MINUTES LATER Parker and Ballard walk and talk. PARKER Man, I feel sorry for Harry. BALLARD He did bring this all upon himself. What did he expect by checking gas leak with a match. PARKER C'mon, Diane. He's a geography teacher. They're about as useful as a set of moral in congress. He just didn't know any better. BALLARD I just donít see how a teacher could be so careless to let something like this happen. PARKER There are just naturally bad teachers in the world, Diane. JUSTIN, a geeky look teen, runs up to Parker. JUSTIN Mr. Parker! Mr. Parker! PARKER Justin, why aren't you in class? JUSTIN I had to tell you that were missing six people in class! Parker becomes immensely afraid. Ballard seems worried. PARKER Come again? JUSTIN Why you were in the teachers lounge, we noticed that six people are missing from class. Parker and Ballard are dead silent. CUT TO: EXT. SCHOOL - SCIENCE WING - SAME Firefighters are working on the building when a LOUD SCREAM comes from school. It's Mr. Parker. One the firefighters scoffs. FIREFIGHTER I hate to be that guy. CUT TO: INT. THEATRE - LOBBY - SAME Brian and Casey are standing at the snack bar, as a CASHIER is filling a bag with popcorn. CASHIER There you go, kid. One bottomless tub of popcorn. Hands it to Brian. BRIAN Thank you. CASHIER (to Casey) What about you? What would you like? Casey is about to speak but Reicther walks by and shots him an evil look. He begins making weird hand gestures. The Cashier is confused. CASHIER (to Brian) Is your friend here deaf and dumb? BRIAN No, just dumb. Casey sighs in frustration. CUT TO: INT. THEATRE - SCREENING - SAME Chris, Joel, and Reicther are all sitting together. Brock sits about five rows ahead, his body lowered in the seat. JOEL Brock, I keep telling you no one will find us here. BROCK I'm not going to risk it. Joel shrugs. CHRIS You know something that has always bother me about episode three? JOEL The shitty acting? CHRIS No. REICTHER The horrible dialogue. CHRIS Close. JOEL What is it then? CHRIS The major plot hole that ruins the movie. REICTHER What plot hole? CHRIS Okay. The Jediís have all kinds of powers right. JOEL Yeah. CHRIS And Yoda is known to see whatís going to happen in the future. Remember, he knew Anakin was going to be evil in episode one. REICTHER Yet, Obi-Wan still trained and caused the downfall of society. (under breath) What a douche. JOEL What are you getting at, Chris? CHRIS How can a whole council of Jedi not see that they all are going to be killed by the clones! Not only that, but shouldn't one of them sense that there was a major conspiracy going on to take down the Jedi. Long pause. Reicther and Joel look at each other. Reicther throws some popcorn at Chris. REICTHER Way to ruin the movie, Chris. CUT TO: INT. SCHOOL - HALLWAY - MINUTES LATER School is over. Kids are getting their stuff from their lockers. Ellen is packed and ready. She walks down the hall and bumps into Will. WILL Ellen, there you are. ELLEN Here I am indeed. How was your day? WILL Fantastic! Wonderful! Possibly the closet thing to perfection I've gotten to. ELLEN (fake enthusiasm) That's great. WILL Nadine is just as big of a Batman fan as I am. She's got like 300 issues of them in her basement. ELLEN Well, she seems lovely. You can tell me more on the way home. WILL That's what I wanted to talk with you about. I can't give you a ride home. ELLEN Why not? WILL Nadine is going to take me to a comic book store and help me get some Batman stuff. ELLEN Oh. Beat. WILL You okay? ELLEN Yeah, I'm fine. WILL I'm really sorry about the ride. ELLEN It's okay. I'll just get a ride from Arthur. WILL Okay. Well I guess I'll see you tomorrow. ELLEN Tomorrow it is. He runs off, completely unaware of how much he's hurt Ellen. CUT TO: INT. THEATRE - LOBBY - SAME Casey is still trying to communicate without talking. He is now beginning a game of charades with the original cashier and two additional ones that have joined. Casey makes some hand gestures. CASHIER #1 First word. More hand gestures. CASHIER #2 Me! CASHIER #3 I! Casey nods. CASHIER #1 Okay. First word is "I." Second word. Casey actions toward a giant coke poster. CASHIER #2 Want! CASHIER #3 "I want that coke poster!" Casey grunts, trying to tell them that's not right. CASHIER #1 Now I understand him. They ignore him, believing that the poster answer is right. Casey moves behind the counter and pours himself a coke. He walks away. Beat. The answer hits them. ALL "I want a coke!" CASHIER #2 God, I can't believe we didnít get that. They laugh it up. CASHIER #1 Hey, didn't he just take a coke without paying? CASHIER #3 I'll call the cops. CUT TO: INT. THEATRE - SCREENING - SECONDS LATER Casey enters and heads over to the guys (Brian now sits with them.) He hands Reicther the soda. CASEY There's your damn soda. REICTHER Okay. You are now officially un jinxed. Only a second later the lights dim. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) We now would like to start our feature presentation. The Gang cheer. ANNOUNCER (O.S.) It's that all time classic that's been popular for years...Sex Wars! A porno starts. Beat. The Gang is stupefied. JOEL Is this a porno or did George Lucas make some drastic new changes to episode four? Beat. BRIAN Reicther, I thought you said they were showing all the "Star Wars" films today. REICTHER That's what the article in the paper said. Reicther into pocket and pulls out the article. Joel takes it and reads it. JOEL God, man. You need glasses. It doesn't say "Star Wars", it says "Sex Wars." BROCK I've just risked my whole high school career to sneak into some cheap porno! CHRIS I don't think it's cheap. Just look at that CGI dildo. BROCK You're not helping! Arguing ensues. Reicther gets everyone's attention. REICTHER Everyone just calm down. Look, we should just get up and leave. We'll go to the shake shop or someplace secluded so we can hang low until school is over. Everyone nods in approval. Just then, BAM! The doors are busted open and about TWELVE POLICE OFFICERS come running in. POLICE OFFICER Everyone freeze. Everyone freezes in the position they are in. The officer sighs. POLICE OFFICER Not literally. Just stand in place and put your hands up in the air. They do so. BRIAN What seems to be the problem officer? POLICE OFFICER The cashier called and said some mentally retarded kid stole some refreshments from the lobby. They all look at Casey who laughs nervously. CASEY I didn't want to be jinxed anymore. BROCK I'll jinx you, you stupid motherfucker. Brock tries to choke Casey but gets shot with an elephant dart. He passes out and hits the ground hard. OFFICER All right, cuff 'em boys. The various officers begin to cuff The Gang. Everyone seems to be sad. CHRIS Cheer up guys. At least the worst of it is over. CUT TO: EXT. THEATRE - SAME A male Newscaster is standing in front of the place, doing a news report. NEWSCASTER Thanks, Carla. Our hearts and prayers go out to the families of the six missing students from Centerville High School. Tonight, it's a channel ten investigation into the seedy world of pornography. When we arrived we got an unexpected surprise. It turns out that police are in the middle of a major bust. In fact here they come. The police emerge, each one with a member of the Gang handcuffed by their side. Newscaster approaches them. NEWSCASTER Excuse me, but do you gentlemen have any thing to say for yourselves? CASEY Hi mom! Joel and Brian have had a enough. They break free and attempt to attack Casey. Both of them get darts in their necks. They go down instantly. NEWSCASTER That seemed a bit excessive, don't you think? OFFICER Not as excessive as what that hobo is doing. The newscaster looks off camera, while the Officer shots a dart into his neck. Newscaster goes down, the officer gets a cheap laugh out of it. CUT TO: INT. WILL'S HOUSE - LIVING ROOM - SAME Nadine is on the couch watching TV. NADINE Will, come in here! Will quickly enters the room. NADINE Aren't those your friends on TV? Will looks at the TV. ON THE TV- A struggle has broken out. Chris, Casey, and Reicther are jumping around trying to break free. The officers are having a hard time holding them down. CHRIS Hate crime! Hate crime! Chris gets a dart in the neck and falls over. Will, nervous, snatches the remote from Nadine. WILL I've never seen those people in my life. NADINE But I could have sworn I - WILL Hey look. It's Gilmore Girls. Why don't be both shut the hell up for about an hour to watch it. Will sits down. Nadine smiles. She shakes her head and they begin watching TV. FADE TO: (BEGIN SONG: Bruce Springsteen's "Drive All Night") EXT. APARTMENT COMPLEX - MINUTES LATER Establishing shot. A beat up old 1986 Ford Taurus pulls up into one of the parking spaces. CUT TO: INT. ARTHUR'S CAR - CONTINUOUS ARTHUR WINCHESTER puts the car into park. Ellen is in the passenger's seat, staring out the car window. Her mind is elsewhere. ARTHUR So Ellen...here we are. ELLEN (elsewhere) Yep. Long beat. Arthur obviously wants to make a move. ARTHUR I was wondering if, you know, you wanted to hang out? Ellen turns to him. ELLEN "Hang out?" ARTHUR Yeah, like uh watch TV, or talk, or something along those lines. Ellen thinks it over. Sheís still deep in thought over Nadine and Will. ELLEN (half heartedly) Sure. Why the hell not. Arthur is overjoyed. ELLEN Why don't we hang here. ARTHUR (excited) Okay. They both get out of the car and head toward the apartment. FADE TO: INT. JAIL - LATER THAT NIGHT The Gang are all huddled around each other, defeated. Brock, Brian, and Joel are all lying on the floor. They moan and groan, grabbing their heads in pain. Chris, and Casey sit on the bench. Each one has an ice pack on a different part of the body. Reicther stands holding the bars looking out. He seems the most depressed out of all of them. On the wall across the cell is a TV playing a game show. CHRIS I can't believe that after all that we never got to see one stinking "Star Wars" movie. CASEY Obi-Wan must be rolling over in his grave. JOEL (sighs) My mom is going to kill me. (beat) Actually she'll probably have her new boyfriend do it for her. Beat. REICTHER (to himself) So close... An officer enters the hall. OFFICER All right you kids. Your parents will be around here shortly. He begins to leave. BRIAN Uh, sir! I hate to be a pain in the lower back region but could you change the channel. When my mom comes and rips me a new asshole I'd like to be watching something more respectable then "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire." OFFICER (annoyed) Fine. The Officer starts flipping channels. He just so happens to land on "Star Wars", which is playing on one of the local channels. He walks away. At first no one notices. But as soon as the music starts playing everyone turns their attention toward the TV. The guys lying on the floor get up, as do the ones sitting on the bench. They all stand right up against the bars staring at the TV. And like that their depression seems to be lifted as they are fixated on the movie. They smile as they finally have reached their goal. FADE OUT. END OF EPISODE
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