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THE LUNCHROOM
Episode Eight
"Comfortably Numb"
Written by
Vincent Biga
Created by
Bruce Snyder
EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
Bruce Snyder
EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
Vincent Biga
EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
Edward Drogos
STORY EDITOR
Melinda Waterman
CONSULTING PRODUCER
Max Majernik
CAST LIST
Will Cooper.................................
Joel Mayberry...............................
Brian Vandele...............................
Brock Warner................................
Reicther....................................
Casey Jennings..............................
Chris Hughes................................
Ellen Conner................................
Cathy Phenis................................
Stacy Cifaretto.............................
Mr. John Parker.............................
GUEST CAST LIST
Brandon Brim................................
Kirk Hoey...................................
Dr. Erwin Carter............................
Joseph Said.................................
Dr. Amy Millsaps............................
Waitress....................................
NOTE: The following episode is told in backwards form.
Much like the movie "Memento."
Copyright © Bruce Snyder
TEASER
FADE IN:
INT. VANDELE HOUSEHOLD - MORNING
TITLE CARD: "Sunday, 10:23 P.M. Vandele Household"
We see WILL COOPER sleeping on a couch. We stay on him for a
few seconds until he falls off and wakes up. Will rouses
himself, then he gets up. He walks by a door and looks
in. He seems puzzled.
WILL
Where's Reicther, Casey, and Chris?
CUT TO:
INT. HOSIPITAL - ER - SAME
CHRIS HUGHES and CASEY JENNINGS are quietly sitting on
bench near the doorway. Both seem nervous. Suddenly DR.
ERWIN CARTER approaches them with REICTHER as his side.
Reicther's entire left side of his face is covered with
Scooby-Doo BANDAGE.
CASEY
Oh, man. Your all right.
REICTHER
Who are you?
Casey and Chris exchange worried looks.
CASEY
Oh -
CHRIS
(overlapping)
- Shit balls!
CARTER
(to Reicther)
Don't worry, son. Your parents
should be here soon.
Reicther looks around.
REICTHER
Holy crap! I'm in a hosipital!
CUT TO:
INT. FREE HEALTH CLINIC - SAME
STACY CIFARETTO sits on the corner edge of a bed. She
seems extremely nervous. She slowly rocks back and
forth, all the while biting her fingernails.
Beat. DR. AMY MILLSAPS enters the room, carrying a
chart. She has a big smile on her face.
MILLSAPS
Your tests came back, Stacy.
Congratulations your HIV negative.
Stacy lets out a huge sigh of relief.
STACY
(to herself)
Oh thank God.
MILLSAPS
And congratulations on your baby.
STACY
What baby?
Beat.
MILLSAPS
You didn't know?
STACY
Know what?
MILLSAPS
According to the tests your four
and half weeks pregnant.
Stacy is shocked. Her mouth is wide open as she just
stares at the wall ahead of her, unable to comprehend
this.
SMASH CUT TO:
OPENING CREDIT SEQUENCE:
Marvin Gaye's "Ain't That Peculiar" plays over the
credits.
AFTER CREDITS:
INT. SUNSHINE CAFé - NIGHT
Title card: "Sunday, 3:17 a.m.: Hours Earlier"
Will, Joel, Brian and Brock enter and sit down in a
booth. Everyone is really quiet and looking at their
menus.
Joel starts snickering.
BRIAN
What's so funny?
JOEL
Dude, I still can't believe that
your first kiss was from a man.
Everyone but Brian laughs.
WILL
Don't worry, Brian. I'll always be
there to tell people that story.
Brian's face is red.
BRIAN
Shut up, besides it wasn't on the
lips so technically it wasn't the
first kiss I gave.
BROCK
Sounds like a lousy excuse to me.
WILL
I second that motion.
A waitress moves to take their order.
WAITRESS
What can I get you gentlemen?
BROCK
I'll have the one pound black angus
burger.
JOEL
I'll have the steak and eggs.
BRIAN
Country fried steak.
After the waitress writes it all down she looks at Will.
WAITRESS
And you?
WILL
(embarrassed)
I'll have the grilled cheese.
WAITRESS
That's on the kids menu hon.
WILL
Yes, I know and I want the grilled
cheese.
The Waitress shrugs her shoulders.
WAITRESS
Grilled cheese it is then.
The Waitress walks off.
BRIAN
What's wrong Will, to little to
order off the big-boy menu?
WILL
Shut your fucking mouth.
JOEL
Dude, I still can't believe that we
did so horrible in bowling. Will
was the only one to break 100, and
he only did it once.
BROCK
I can't believe your still going on
about that, I mean its no big deal.
BRIAN
Your just saying that because you
couldn't break 45.
BROCK
Hey, I told you to shut up about
that. That fucking lane was leaning
to one side.
BRIAN
Sounds like a lousy excuse to me.
WILL
What I can't believe is that those
guys are still playing Risk, what
is been like 7 hours right?
JOEL
That sounds about right. I'm
surprised Chris even brought it,
you think he would have learned a
lesson when I threw Casey through
his wall.
WILL
Ah, good times.
SMASH CUT TO:
EXT. VANDELE HOME - NIGHT
Title Card: "Sunday 12:15 A.M. Hours Earlier."
Chris and Casey quickly emerge from the house, carrying
what appears to be Reicther. We quickly notice that
there is a lot of dried blood on Reicther's head.
CASEY
Okay, okay. No need to panic.
CHRIS
No need? I've got Reicther's blood
on my pants!
CASEY
Quiet down! We just need to get him
to a hosipital.
CHRIS
Okay, okay.
They head toward the driveway.
CHRIS
Shit! Stop!
CASEY
What?
CHRIS
There's no car!
Casey looks over. The driveway is completely empty.
CASEY
Jesus!
CHRIS
Brian and the others took it
remember?
CASEY
OH FUCK!!!
They stop moving.
CASEY
Okay, we've got to think of a new
plan.
Pause. Suddenly Reicther mutters some gibberish.
CASEY
I've got it, we don't we take the
bus?
CHRIS
What bus?
CASEY
You know...
(thinks of
how to describe it)
...The bus system.
CHRIS
I don't think we have one around
here.
CASEY
WHAT?! No bus!
Casey, in anger and without knowing it, drops Reicther.
CASEY
WHAT KIND OF PLACE DOESN'T HAVE A
BUS?
Casey shakes his head. Chris begins to struggle holding
Reicther by himself.
CHRIS
Uh...Casey.
Casey finally notices.
CASEY
Oh God!
He quickly picks up Reicther.
Pause.
CASEY
What if we walk there?
CHRIS
A twenty minute walk?
CASEY
Yeah.
CHRIS
In the middle of the night...
carrying a lifeless corpse?
CASEY
What's the problem with that?
CHRIS
Nothing except the police may find
that a little bit suspicious. Look
we need to transport him there
quickly.
Short pause.
CASEY
Wait! I know someone that lives
nearby.
CHRIS
Does he have a car?
CASEY
Oh yeah.
SMASH CUT TO:
INT. KIRK HOEY'S HOUSE - LIVING ROOM - MINUTES LATER
JOSEPH SAID, the Iraqi exchange student, is sitting on
the floor with his eyes glued to the TV. In the
background, the album "Dark Side of the Moon" is
playing, while the movie "The Wizard of Oz" play on the
TV. KIRK HOEY is sitting on the couch, reading a NEWSWEEK.
JOSEPH
I don't think this is syncing up at
all.
Chris and Casey enter carrying Reicther.
JOSEPH
Hey, how did you get in?
CASEY
The front door was wide open.
JOSEPH
Oh, yeah. Kirk said he was cold but
I thought he was having one of his
"fits."
CHRIS
"Fits?"
JOSEPH
I bet him fifty bucks that he
couldn't go a week without drugs.
Since then he keeps shaking and
twitching.
CASEY
How long has he been like this.
Joseph scoffs.
JOSEPH
We only started the bet like an
hour ago.
KIRK
My God!
(off Newsweek)
Did you hear about this? The
President has the authority to kill
anyone he suspects of being a
terrorist. They don't even have to
be confirmed terrorist, just
"suspected" ones.
He hurls the magazine across the room.
KIRK
God, this country makes me sick!
Casey and Chris seem to be taken back by Kirk's new
behavior.
CASEY
I never knew Kirk could get so...
"serious."
CHRIS
It's quite "frightening" actually.
JOSEPH
I'll fix this.
Joseph reaches into his pockets and pulls out a JOINT
and a LIGHTER.
JOSEPH
(giggling)
Here's some spinach, Popeye.
KIRK
Wait a minute, what about our bet?
JOSEPH
Ah, forgot about it. You can pay me
in whatever food you have.
KIRK
All I've got left are some moldy
old Oreos which -
JOSEPH
Deal.
They shake hands.
CHRIS
Um, don't want to ruin the moment
but our friend is kind of dying
here.
Joseph hands the items to Kirk, who quickly lights up
and takes a long puff. A smile comes across his face.
KIRK
Let's save your friend!
FADE TO:
EXT. FREE HEALTH CLINIC - NIGHT
Title Card: "Saturday, 11:59 p.m."
Stacy is sitting on a bench just outside of the clinic.
She is deep in thought. A green VAN pulls up in front
and Dr. Amy Millsaps jumps out.
MILLSAPS
Thanks for the ride, Mark.
The Van pulls away. Millsaps shuffles through her purse
and is about to go before she notices Stacy.
MILLSAPS
Are you okay?
STACY
...Yeah. I'm fine.
Beat.
MILLSAPS
You know it' cold. Maybe you should
come in.
STACY
I was going to come in, I was just
thinking.
Beat.
MILLSAPS
Did you come for a test or are you
waiting for someone?
STACY
Actually I came to get an HIV test.
MILLSAPS
Oh. Well if you want I can give you
the test. I'm a doctor in there.
(holds out hand)
Amy Millsaps.
STACY
(shaking hand)
Stacy Cifaretto.
Beat.
STACY
That'd be good. But...um, how long
before I can get the results?
MILLSAPS
Well we normally get the results
back to the patients two days after
we administer the tests.
STACY
Is it possible to get results
quicker then that?
MILLSAPS
Well, if we gave you the test now
you could get the results in say
six hours or so, but I don't know
if you want to wait around here for
that long of time.
STACY
I don't mind.
Millsaps gives Stacy an odd look, but can see that Stacy
is serious.
MILLSAPS
All right, Ms. Cifaretto. If you'll
just follow me.
Stacy stands. Millsaps notices that Stacy isn't smiling.
MILLSAPS
Remember to keep smiling.
Stacy is caught completely off guard.
STACY
Why?
MILLSAPS
Well someone once told me it makes
people wonder what you're up to.
Stacy smiles, and Millsaps leads her in.
CUT TO:
INT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT
TITLE CARD: "Saturday, 11:43 p.m."
Will, Joel, Brock and Brian have just sat down and are
waiting for the movie to start.
WILL
For opening night this place isn't
very full.
JOEL
That's because this is Batman, its
not a historic event like Star Wars
was.
BROCK
Yeah, they needed how many theaters
for the midnight showing?
BRIAN
Three.
WILL
And how long did you wait in line?
BRIAN
2 hours 17 minutes.
WILL
And how big a star wars geek are
you?
Brian stretches out his arms as far as they will go.
BRIAN
This much.
JOEL
How much longer till the movie
starts?
BROCK
Let me see here...
Brock pulls out a pocket watch.
BROCK (CONT'D)
About 15 minuets I'd say.
JOEL
God your old fashioned.
BRIAN
Too bad bowling isn't old fashioned.
BROCK
Hey, I said shut up about that!
BRIAN
Your just mad because you're the
only one who couldn't break 50.
BROCK
Shut up, I told you that lane was
leaning to one side.
BRIAN
Sounds like a lousy excuse to me.
WILL
Do you think their in the right
theater?
Will points to an elderly couple have taken a seat.
BROCK
Why would they want to see Batman?
BRIAN
Duh, their the first generation of
Batman faith fulls.
BROCK
I guess.
The lights dim, the movie starts.
BRIAN
Shut up, no talking!
After a short moment of silence Will leans over to Joel.
WILL
Give me some of you gummy worms.
BRIAN
I said no talking, you dare
disrespect Batman!?
WILL
You should know better than that
considering what kind of dirt I
have on you.
BRIAN
Do your worst.
Brian starts drinking from a large soda.
WILL
Brandon Brim was your first kiss.
Brock and Joel break out laughing while Brian drops his
drink, spilling it everywhere.
WHITE FADE:
INT. VANDELE DINING ROOM - EARLIER
Title card: "Saturday 10:57 P.M."
The room is very dark with only the hanging light
illuminating the Risk board and all those who sit around
it. Reicther, Casey and Chris are gathered around the
Risk board, no one moves anything, they all appear to be
deep in thought. Chris glares at Casey, who glares at
Reicther who glares at Chris.
Suddenly a door flings open and the main light is
switched on.
WILL
Hey guys get ready to go, were
going to see Batman at the old time
theatre.
CASEY
Count me out.
Reicther and Chris nod in agreement.
WILL
What? Your not going?
CHRIS
Righto.
WILL
But you guys spent 5 extra bucks
for the advance tickets and your
not even going to use them?
REICTHER
Nope.
WILL
Its that game, its evil its like
swallowing your souls.
Casey glares up at Will. They're dark circles under
his eyes.
CASEY
Take that back!
Will stumbles back surprised.
WILL
Dude, your eyes!
CASEY
Shut up and leave!
WILL
A-alright, I'm gone.
CASEY
Shut off the light.
Will flicks the light switch and starts to close the
door.
CHRIS
Gently!
Will closes the door softly and we can hear him walk
away.
CUT TO:
INT. VANDELE LIVING ROOM - SAME
Joel, Brian and Brock are in the living room. Will
enters.
JOEL
Are they coming?
WILL
No, I don't think so.
BRIAN
Why not?
WILL
They're too busy playing Risk.
Joel, Brian and Brock look a little surprised.
BRIAN
Okay. Well, lets get going.
They leave, Will is the last one out Will starts to
close the door, but stops and grins.
CUT TO:
INT. VADNELE DINING ROOM - SAME
Casey seems to be in deep thought.
CASEY
Alright Chris, China attacks
Mongolia.
We hear Will slam the front door. A curtain bar falls
onto Reicther's head causing him to slam his head into
the Risk board. The pieces fly everywhere.
EXT. VANDELE HOUSE - SECONDS LATER
Brian, Will, Joel and Brock are walking to the car. We
hear an ungodly scream come from the house.
BRIAN
What the hell was that?
JOEL
I didn't hear anything.
Will snickers.
CUT TO:
INT. VANDELE HOUSE - STACY'S ROOM - NIGHT
Title Card: "Saturday 10:04 p.m."
There's no one in sight. The radio is blasting Queen's
"Under Pressure." Suddenly the phone begins to ring.
STACY (O.S.)
I got it!
Stacy runs into the room and picks up her phone.
STACY
(into phone)
Hello?
(pause, surprise)
Oh, my God! How are you? I never
expected you to call.
(pause)
I'm doing fine. I'm actually
leaving for college in a couple of
weeks.
(pause)
It's in Chicago.
(pause)
Yeah, I know. So what's new with
you?
(pause)
What kind of news?
After this there is a very long pause. At first Stacy is
carefully listening, occasionally nodding and saying
"right." After a while those looks fade into a very
stern and serious look. Her mouth begin to open a bit.
She quickly drops the phone and covers her mouth. She
slowly falls to the ground and puts her back up against
a wall. Tears begin to form around her eyes.
The music gets louder just as Stacy begins staring at
the wall ahead of her.
FADE TO:
INT. BOWLING ALLEY - NIGHT
Title Card: "Saturday 9:43 P.M."
We focus on bowling pins all set up, suddenly a bowling
ball crashes into them sending them everywhere. As all
the pins fall down we see that one is still standing.
The camera pans to see Will at the end of the lane,
Brian, Joel and Brock are behind him. We zoom in on the
group.
WILL
Damnit! I always miss that one pin!
We see Joel is wrapping his feet in toilet paper.
JOEL
(still wrapping)
Stop whining. At least you got the
other 9. And its only the first
frame.
Will walks back to take a seat.
WILL
Yeah, but you don't understand, I
always miss that one.
Brock moves up to take his turn.
BROCK
Stop bitching, at least you can hit
the pins.
Brock steps up to the lane. Brock bowls, the ball seems
to be going dead on, but as it nears the pins it swerves
to the left into the gutter.
BROCK
Damn it all to hell!!
We see that there is a little girl in the lane next to
them, she looks like she's about to cry.
BROCK
Oh, like you haven't heard it before!
WILL
Calm down dude, we've just started.
You'll find your groove.
JOEL
Alright Brian, your up I don't
think it will be too hard to beat
your first frame of zero.
Brian gets up to bowl.
BRIAN
I told you I haven't done this in a
long time. I have to get the rhythm.
JOEL
Yeah right, whatever you say buddy.
Brian bowls and gets a strike.
JOEL
I think I'll just shut up now.
Brian walks back to a table where Will and Brock are
sitting. Joel finishes wrapping his feet in toilet
paper.
WILL
How's that working for you Joel?
JOEL
Just fine, although I bet socks
would do a whole lot better.
Joel starts to bowl.
BROCK
So do you think they really won't
let us in Wal-Mart again?
WILL
Who cares? I'm more of a K-mart man.
Joel walks back after he takes his first shot.
JOEL
What did you guys do anyway?
BRIAN
Well...
Brian stops and seems to be trying to think. He looks at
Will who also seems to be thinking.
WILL
Oh my god, we didn't do anything!
There is a short pause. Joel and Brock eye Will and
Brian.
BRIAN
Well, nothing 'banned from the
store' worthy.
FADE TO:
INT. WAL-MART PARKING LOT - EVENING
Title Card: "Saturday, 8:36 P.M."
Will, Joel, Brock and Brian are walking into the store.
JOEL
Why are we here again?
WILL
We're hear to buy a light saber.
JOEL
But Brian already has a light saber.
BRIAN
Yes but it takes to light sabers to
duel.
The guys enter the store and look around, the store in
huge.
WILL
Now, where would the toy section
be?
BROCK
I think the place where the bikes
are hanging from the ceiling would
be a good start.
WILL
One would think.
They start off in the direction of the toys, Joel stops.
JOEL
You guys go ahead, I'm going to go
buy some socks.
Joel points to his feet, he has sandals on with no socks.
WILL
Socks, why?
JOEL
Because I don't have socks and
we're going bowling later, which
means we have to rent shoes and I
have to wear socks.
BRIAN
You could just go barefoot in the
shoes, they don't care.
JOEL
Yes but I do!
WILL
Wait don't you remember that one
time -
FADE TO:
INT. PARK - DAY (FLASHBACK)
Will and Joel are walking and talking.
JOEL
So I said to him-
Joel stops walking and looks down, we pan down to see
that he has just stepped in dog poop bare foot.
WILL
That's disgusting.
Joel just shrugs his shoulders and wipes his foot in the
Grass.
JOEL
As I was saying-
CUT TO:
INT. WAL-MART - SAME
Back to present.
JOEL
That's different. Bowling shoes are
a breeding ground for all kinds of
germs!
WILL
And a dog's ass isn't?
Beat.
JOEL
I won't dignify that with a
response.
Joel heads off.
INT. TOY AISLE - SECONDS LATER
Will, Brian and Brock and are starting at the Star Wars
toys.
WILL
I don't believe it. They don't have
a god-damned light saber.
BRIAN
I find it ironic how all they have
is Chewie's blaster.
BROCK
Well, technically they do, but
those are the cheap kind that are
just colored plastic cones over a
flashlight and only extend 2 feet
and don't even come in a box.
WILL
Fuck that, that's no light saber. I
want one that makes sound and shit!
BROCK
They might have those light sabers
somewhere else.
WILL
Good idea Brock, you go look that
way. We'll look this way.
Brock leaves.
BRIAN
We're not going to look are we?
WILL
Hell no.
Will grabs a cheap light saber.
WILL
En guard, bitch.
Brian grabs a light saber and they start fighting in the
aisle. They fight for a few seconds before a Wal-Mart
EMPLOYEE breaks it up.
EMPLOYEE
Cut it out, no fighting in the
store!
WILL
But we weren't really fighting.
GIRL
I don't care cut it out!
BRIAN
Fine.
Will and Brian put the toys on the shelf and start to
walk away.
GIRL
Put them back where you found them.
Will and Brian eye each other, then slowly move and put
the light sabers back on the hook.
The girl turns and walks away. She turns a corner.
Will and Brian start walking.
WILL
What a bitch.
BRIAN
Yeah, she was talking to us like we
were little kids.
Brian stops and picks up a toy revolver. Will now has
his back to Brian.
BRIAN
Reach for the sky ya rat bastard!
Will turns around and we see that he's holding a toy
shotgun.
BRIAN
Oh crap.
INT. ANOTHER TOY AISLE - SAME
Brock is standing in front of a light saber display.
BROCK
Here they are.
VOICE (O.S.)
(over a p.a. system)
Security check on section E,
security check on section E.
Brock looks around and sees Section E clearly marked on
the wall.
Brock sighs
BROCK
Why do I feel that Will and Brian
had something to do with this?
CUT TO:
INT. TOY AISLE - SAME
Will and Brian are still playing with the toy guns.
VOICE (O.S.)
(over a p.a. system)
Security check on section E,
security check on section E.
WILL
Did that voice sound familiar to
you?
BRIAN
Look.
Brian points to a wall labeled Section E.
WILL
Oh, damn it. Well Brian, I think
its time to go.
Will and Brian up down the toys and start walking down
an aisle. They turn a corner and see the girl from
before talking to a security guard. The girl sees Will
and Brian and points at them. The security guard turns
and starts walking towards the two.
WILL
Lets evade the law!
BRIAN
Sounds like fun!
Will and Brian run away. The guard starts running also.
CUT TO:
INT. ANOTHER TOY AISLE - SAME
Brock is examining a box. At the end of the aisle Will
and Brian suddenly turn a corner, and continue running
down the aisle.
BROCK
Will I found -
WILL
Less talky, more runny.
Will and Brian run by. Brock looks confused, he turns
to see a security guard walking down the aisle.
We zoom in on Brocks face, he closes his eyes.
BROCK (V/O)
Okay, just stay calm and he won't
know your with them.
Brock opens his eyes and we zoom out, we see he's
running and has already caught up to Will and Brian.
BROCK
Oh damn it!
INT. DIFFERENT AISLE - SAME
Joel has two packages of socks in his hand. One says
"Athlete" the other says "Construction Crew." He seems
to be having a hard time deciding.
JOEL
"Athletes" run a lot, so they must
have good socks. But construction
workers lift heavy stuff, so they
must have good socks too. But,
which has the better sock?
Joel looks around.
JOEL
I wonder where the fitting rooms
are?
At the end of the aisle we see Will, Brian and Brock run
by. Joel doesn't notice.
CUT TO:
INT. DIFFERENT AISLE - SAME
Will, Brian, and Brock have just turned a corner into an
aisle. They are all out of breath.
WILL
I think, we lost him.
Will looks around the corner. We see the Guard looking
in the opposite direction scratching his head.
WILL
Oh damn it!
BRIAN
Maybe we could just avoid him
altogether and leave.
WILL
Great plan but he's blocking the
way to the exit.
BRIAN
Hey, I've contributed my share. It's
someone else's turn.
BROCK
Oh my God.
WILL
What?
BROCK
Its just like Metal Gear Solid. the
guard armed to the teeth guarding
the only escape while we try to
escape naked and unequipped...
WILL
(to Brian)
What the hell is he talking about?
BRIAN
A video game apparently.
WILL
Figures.
BROCK
Follow me.
Brock slowly sneaks out of the aisle, careful not to
make a sound to alert the guard. Will and Brian
hesitate, but then begin to follow Brock as well.
INT. DRESSING ROOM - SAME
Joel is trying on the socks, on his left foot is the
construction crew sock, on the right is the Athlete
sock.
JOEL
(to himself)
The crew sock is much more sturdy
and supportive, but the athletic
sock is flexy and puts a spring in
my step, its also much cooler than
the crew sock...
Joel looks at his feet seeming unable to make up his mind.
JOEL
I wonder what it would be like if I
wore a crew and athlete sock on
each foot...
Joel starts to put on more socks.
INT. AISLE - SAME
The three are now directly behind the guard and are
still undiscovered.
The three slowly sneak their way past the guard who
doesn't suspect a thing. They appear to be in the clear,
when suddenly Brock sneezes.
The Guard turns quickly and sees the three.
WILL
Okay, so what happened in that game
when the guard caught you?
Will turns to see Brian and Brock already running.
WILL
Oh damn it!
Will starts running after them.
INT. DRESSING ROOM - SAME
Joel has just walked out of the dressing room. We see
Brian, Will and Brock all running through the store,
after they disappear around a corner, we see the guard
chasing after them.
JOEL
That's interesting.
INT. WAL-MART PARKING LOT - LATER
We see Joel walking with a Wal-Mart bag in his hand. He
gets in a car, we see that it is Will's.
JOEL
So, are you guys banned from the
store or what?
BRIAN
Yeah, we would gotten away but they
locked down the automatic doors so
we couldn't get out.
Joel nods his head.
JOEL
Well, at least you'll have an
interesting story to tell your
grand children some day.
WILL
I'm looking forward to it.
Will starts the car and we see it start to move off.
WILL
What fucking took you so long?
JOEL
I had to pay for my socks, oddly
enough that didn't get me chased by
security.
We see the bag Joel was carrying thrown out the window.
JOEL (O.S.)
My socks!
FADE TO:
INT. VANDELE DINING ROOM - EARLY EVENING
Title card reads "Saturday 7:57 p.m."
We see that Chris, Reicther, Casey and Brian are all
crowded around the board.
CASEY
Brian, the Western US attacks the
Eastern US.
BRIAN
You bastard we had an agreement!
CASEY
Don't you know? I'm a dick, I don't
make alliances with anyone. Now
roll bitch.
Will pops his head in.
WILL
Hey, Brian. Some guy named Brandon
Brim is at the door.
Brian gets up and begins to leave.
CASEY
Hey what about our game!
BRIAN
Fuck it. Game over. And since it's
my house I win.
He leaves.
CHRIS
At least he didn't put you through
a wall this time.
CUT TO:
INT. BRIAN'S LIVING ROOM - SAME
Brian enters and heads for the front door. Will, Joel,
and Brock are sitting around the couch. Joel has a pad
of paper and a pen.
Brian opens the door to reveal BRANDON BRIM.
BRANDON
Hey man.
BRIAN
Hey.
WILL
Well, Brian. Aren't you going to
introduce us.
Without saying a word, he steps outside and slams the door.
WILL
Jeez.
Will turns back to Joel and Brock.
WILL
I need of a change of scenery,
lets go do something.
BROCK
Funny you should ask, we've been
making a list.
Brock hands Will a piece of paper, Will looks over it.
In the background with can see through the front window,
Brian standing talking to Brandon. Brandon is explaining
something in detail with a piece of paper in his hand.
WILL
Buy light saber to light saber
duel...Go bowling...That's a
short list.
JOEL
It was all we could come up with...
From this point on we focus on Brian and Brandon.
Brandon is still showing him the paper.
WILL (O.S.)
Well, guess what film classic is
playing at the old time theater.
JOEL (O.S.)
What classic?
WILL (O.S.)
The original 1966 Batman movie with
Adam West.
Suddenly Brian looks really excited and begins to
explain something to Brandon. Brandon laughs.
JOEL (O.S.)
You really want to see that?
WILL (O.S.)
Well, it's that or "Pee-Wee's Big
Adventure."
BROCK (O.S.)
Oh God, not that movie.
WILL (O.S.)
What do you have against Pee-Wee
Herman damn it!
Brandon pulls out of his pocket, what appears to be
Concert tickets. Brian is extremely happy. He jumps up
and down a bit. He quickly gives Brandon a massive bear
hug followed by a quick KISS on the forehead.
THE CAMERA PULLS BACK until we can see Joel, Will, and
Brock again.
BROCK
He's just too weird for me.
WILL
Trust me Brock. Nothing's too weird
for you.
JOEL
I like the idea of seeing Batman
then Pee-Wee.
Outside the window. Brandon pats Brian on the back and
departs. Brian kinda of looks a bit off.
He enters the house.
JOEL
Me and Brock will go call the
theatre and get tickets.
Joel and Brock get up and leave the room. Brian comes
over and flops on the armchair.
WILL
So what did old Brandon want?
Beat. Brian is about to say something, but considers it.
BRIAN
Can you keep a secret?
FADE OUT.
(Pink Floyd's "Comfortably Numb" plays over the credits.)
END OF EPISODE
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