This screenplay is copyrighted to its author. All rights reserved. This screenplay may not be used or reproduced without the express written permission of the author.
THE LunchROOM Episode 1.08 "Join the Army" TELEPLAY BY Casey Wrenn and Vincent Biga STORY BY Vincent Biga and Bruce Snyder CREATED BY Bruce Snyder CAST LIST Will Cooper................................. Joel Mayberry............................... Brian Vandele............................... Brock Warner................................ Reicther.................................... Casey Jennings.............................. GUEST CAST LIST Chris Hughes................................ Army Guy.................................... Clerk....................................... Rene David.................................. Emily Lucas................................. Cathy Phenis................................ Copyright © Bruce Snyder TEASER: INT. MALL Ė DAY Will is walking towards an arcade and passes by a tall man dressed in Army Clothes. Will turns, and walks back in front of him. WILL Is it fun? Being in the Army? The Army guy stares at him, but doesnít say anything. WILL Whatís it like to shoot people? ARMY GUY Get out of here kid. WILL Do you ever get scared of guns? ARMY GUY Do you want some trouble kid? WILL I just want to know what it is like to be in the Army. I mean do you guys feel any fear? The Army Guy takes Will by his arm. WILL Where are we going? ARMY GUY You want fear?, Iíll give you some fear. The Army Guy pulls Will, as they walk towards the exit of the mall. The camera shifts to across the mall hallway into a Electronics Boutique we see Brian taking to a clerk. BRIAN What do you mean it was pushed back? CLERK Samurai Warriors was pushed back till May, sorry. BRIAN But itís freaking March, whatís the fucking deal!? Why push it back so far?! CLERK Sorry, you can reserve it though. Brian looks angry, his fists are clenched and a few seconds pass by CLERK Hey man are you ok? Brian still says nothing his face starts getting red. BRIAN (quietly) You bastard. OPENING CREDIT SEQUENCE: Marvin Gaye's "Ain't That Peculiar" plays over the credits. FADE IN: EXT. HOUSE Ė DAY Casey walks up to his mail box. He shifts his book bag to his left shoulder. He pulls a handful of mail out, and carries it, as he walks up his front porch and through the front door. INT. LIVING ROOM - SAME Casey sets his book bag on the couch, and places the mail on the end table. He walks to the answering machine. "1" flashes. Casey hits play. LACIEíS VOICE (O.S.) Casey, why do you act like such a dick around me? We need to talk. Sit with me tomorrow or Iíll sit with you. Casey hits the delete button. CASEY Crap. Casey walks out the front door. INT. LUNCHROOM Ė DAY Casey walks up to Lacie. Lacie looks up from her seat. Casey walks over to the table, and takes a seat. LACIE Hey, ass. CASEY What do you want from me? LACIE I just want to know why you act like a dick every time your around me. All quiet and such? CASEY That's how I always act. Remember? LACIE You could at least say hi. CASEY We sit on opposite sides of the class room. LACIE Fuck it I donít know why I bother with you! CASEY Well stop then! LACIE Fine I will! They both get up and leave, the chairs slam into the table as they push them in, focuses on the clock, thirty minuets pass by quickly, camera moves to focus on the table that Casey and Lacie were sitting at, We see Will and Brian next to them is sitting ANDY JENNINGS who is eating. Will and Brian remain silent as Andy eats. When he finishes Andy gets up and walks away. WILL Finally I never thought the homophobe would leave. BRIAN So what did he do to you? WILL Well after he crammed me into his jeep he started driving...really fast INT. JEEP Ė DAY (FLASHBACK) FLASH BACK: Will sitting with the Army guy in a car, the army guy is driving. ARMY GUY Are you scarred yet? WILL No. ARMY GUY You will be. Short pause. WILL Why does this jeep smell funny? ARMY GUY Thatís classified. Short pause.. INT. LUNCHROOM Ė PRESENT Will seems to be disgusted by the way the story is going. He looks over Brian's shoulder. WILL Iíll finish it up latter. Time to go to class. Brian and Will go their separate ways at a forked hallway. FADE OUT FADE IN: INT. HALLWAY Ė MINUTES LATER Joel and Chris are walking down the hallway. Joel is explaining something to Chris. JOEL So usually try not to applaud at them. But we get the occasional teacher that tells us we have to. CHRIS Oh I see. Hey, where's the nearest bathroom at? JOEL Up here. They walk up to a bathroom. Just then THREE SENIORS walk out. Before Chris and Joel enter, FIVE more SENIORS walk out. Followed by EIGHT SOPHMORES. After all this people have left, Chris and Joel stare at each other in amazement. They quickly enter the bathroom. INT. BATHROOM Ė SAME Joel and Chris enter. We see that there are FOUR stalls and FOUR of the wall toilets. CHRIS How the hell did all of them use the bathroom? INT. MATH CLASS Ė MINUTES LATER Will is starring into space suddenly Rene and Emily sit down beside him. RENE Hi Will. Will snaps out of it. WILL Hi. RENE Did you do anything fun over the weekend? WILL Well first there was the run in with the KKK, then a private in the army almost rapped me. I don't know about you but it sounds like I'm having one hell of a week. RENE (Shocked) I heard about that, how some guys saved a black kid from them I didn't know you were there! WILL Oh yeah I was there. EMILY I didnít know you were friends with any black guys. WILL What are you trying to say? EMILY Er.. I just meant...well...I... WILL I'm kidding and I didn't know Chris till that night. RENE You mean you saved a guy you just met from the KKK? WILL Yeah so? RENE Well thatís just a really nice thing to do. WILL Well my friends helped too if Brian and Joel werenít there I don't know what would have happened. EMILY I heard Brian was about to take them all on when they said something about beating up Asians. WILL (V/O) Oh shit. RENE Yeah I heard about that too, do you know why he did it Will. WILL (V/O) Think of something you idiot! EMILY Will? Emily hits him in the back of the head WILL Oh sorry, Brianís step mom is Asian, and sheís like... (thinks) ...nice...to him...and stuff. RENE Oh. EMILY That's funny. WILL Why? EMILY I never knew Brian had a heart. WILL You'd be surprised. RENE Now whatís this about an army guy? WILL Oh Christ. Before Will can begin his story the screen fades to black. FADE IN: INT. HALLWAY Ė MINUTES LATER Casey is walking down the hallway by himself. He stares down at the ground, deep in thought. CASEY (V/O) I wonder if what Lacie said was true? Am I dick? Then again Lacie says a lot of things that aren't true. Casey bumps into someone. CASEY Sorry. STUDENT Watch where your going, dick. The student walks off. CASEY I'M NOT A DICK! INT. LIBRARY Ė MINUTES LATER Brian at a computer in the library typing quickly Will walks up to him. WILL What are you doing? BRIAN Trying to finish this thing. WILL What is it? BRIAN A speech for Speech class. WILL Hey. BRIAN Yeah. WILL Do you have a step mom? BRIAN Yep. WILL She's Asian now. BRIAN Gottcha. Will and Brian laugh. WILL See ya' man. Will walks off. After a few seconds Brock enters. BROCK (to Brian) They pushed it back. BRIAN Yeah I know it sucks. BROCK Do you know how far? BRIAN May. BROCK Geez. BRIAN Thatís what I thought Brian sees a book in Brock's hand. BRIAN Want me to get you a good book. BROCK No thanks Iíve seen what you call 'good' books. BRIAN Just cause one of the guyís is named Pug BROCK Itís so stupid, though! BRIAN Pug kicks ass, heís like the Gandalf of that series, only stronger. BROCK I doubt that. BRIAN Whatever, now away with you, I have to finish this. BROCK See ya. Brock exits, after a few seconds of typing Brian looks over his shoulder to look at a clock, he moves his eyes down and sees Cathy looking for a book, he looks on a few more secondís not noticing heís staring, suddenly Cathy look over her shoulder, they make eye contact for a split second, Brian quickly turns his head and starts typing again. BRIAN (quietly) Stupid, stupid, stupid. INT. HALLWAY Ė LATER Joel and Casey standing out in the hallway, Joel is wearing a leather jacket and Casey a head bandana. JOEL Sounds like a pretty bad fight. CASEY Yep. JOEL It sounds like sheís paranoid to me. CASEY Good Iím not the only one. JOEL Ready to practice? CASEY Sure. They begin to practice their dance steps. Brian walks down the hallway and sees Joel and Casey. BRIAN Why are you dressed like that and why are you standing out here? JOEL Were reenacting 'West Side Story' in our English class. BRIAN That's what happens when you get into those Honorís classes. JOEL Yeah. Casey accidentally steps on Joel's foot. JOEL Owww!!! Jesus Christ. CASEY Oh God. I'm sorry Joel. JOEL Watch where you going next time, dickhead. CASEY (to himself) Dick? BRIAN Didn't you guys do some kind of play type thing in 7th grade? JOEL Yeah, that was dumb too. BRIAN Good thing you didnít show up that day. JOEL Damn strait. BRIAN So who do you guys play? JOEL I'm shark punk #1. CASEY And Iím punk #2. BRIAN Any lines? JOEL I'm gonna cut you good! Brian chuckles as he walks off to his own class. INT. STUDY HALL Ė MINUTES LATER Will, Brock and Reicther talking in the study hall, it is near the end of the day and every one is standing up waiting. BROCK He took you to his Jeep? WILL Yeah. REICTHER He likes Britney Spears. WILL Yeah. BROCK What happened after that, where did he take you? WILL Well you see... The bell rings and every one starts to leave. WILL I'll tell you all tomorrow. They all leave. EXT. SIDEWALK Ė MINUTES AFTER SCHOOL Will, Joel and Casey are walking home. WILL Then he took me to his jeep, I thought he was gonna take me to where all the army dudes hang out and pass me around like a peace pipe. JOEL That's what you get for insulting him. CASEY What happened after that. WILL All I can tell you is that the jeep smelled like shit and heís a fan of Britney Spears. JOEL Why? WILL Thatís where I left off with Brian, Brock, and Reicther I figure Iíll tell you all tomorrow at lunch. CASEY Ok see ya. Will heads down an other street while Casey and Joel continue to walk straight. INT. CHRIS' HOUSE Ė BASEMENT - LATER Will and Chris are playing darts. CHRIS And get this, about fifteen different guys came out of the bathroom. WILL But there's only about eight stalls. CHRIS I know. That's the real brain buster. What did the other guys use? Will walks up to the board and collects the darts. CHRIS Brian told me to ask you about the army guy. WILL Ah, Jesus. CHRIS He also said that Britney Spears was involved? WILL Yep. CHRIS Who the hell is that? Will gives him a look. INT. LUNCHROOM Ė NEXT DAY Will, Joel, Brian, Brock, Reicther, Casey and Chris are sitting at the table. All of the guys are looking at Will. Will is occupied with his English homework. REICHTER Well? WILL Well what? CASEY What happened? WILL What? CHRIS What happened with the army guy? WILL Hang on I gotta get this done first BROCK Seize the book! Brian grabs the book from Will. WILL What the fuck? I gotta finish that! BRIAN The faster you finish the story the faster you can finish this. WILL Alright alright, ok here's what happened... Will looks up and notices something. His mouth drops in shock. JOEL Hey, no more stalling, tell us the story. Will continues to stare. REICTHER What are you looking at? Everyone turns around. We see that in the there is a special army recruiting station in the Lunchroom for the day. The Army Guy working the booth is the same one as before. He doesn't notice Will at first but looks over and sees him. The Army Guy waves at Will and smiles. Everyone at the table, slowly turn and give Will a look. Will seems speechless. FADE OUT. ("War (What Is It Good For)" by Mekkanikka plays over the credits. END OF EPISODE
Return to Simply Scripts