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"SIX MINUTE MASSACRE" Written By Christopher "VANSTEIN" VanAlstine First Draft July 13 2006 FADE IN: LAKE SIDE- NIGHT A huge campfire is blazing in the center of a half circle of 7 kids who are all in their late teens. There are empty bottles of various alcohol strewn across the ground and the kids are all noticeably drunk. To the right is a van facing away from the campfire with its back doors propped open. Behind the kids there is a lake with an eerie reflection of the moon in it. Sarah is taking long sips from a wine cooler. She is sitting on Mike's lap and he has his hands around her waist. SARAH This is spooky isn't it. JOE (from across the fire) What? SARAH A bunch of kids out here late at night and getting wasted by the side of a lake. Its right out of a bad horror movie. Mike grabs at Sarah's tits and kisses her on the neck. MIKE Yeah now all we need is the premarital sex scene and some monster's gonna come out here and get us. Sarah screams/giggles at this but we can all tell that she's into it. JOE (taking a drag of a joint) Fuck that movie, its so lame! It's just some retarded kid in a big man's body hunting down people just as dumb as he is. I mean come on you never see the guy run but all these kids are running like they're gonna shit their pants and they always end up dead. I mean what's the deal with that? SARAH Yeah Jason just needs to get laid! Then he'd understand what all the fuss is about and tell his mommy to go fuck herself. CARRIE (grabbing the joint off of Joe) I think Freddy's the bomb. He really gets creative with his killing and he actually talks unlike some of the others. If I had to die by the hands of some fucked up crazy killer it would be him. JOE (hi-fives Carrie) Freddy's the man! Him and that little pipe smokin' Leprechaun dude. First time I saw that movie I was trippin' out on acid. Fuck man the tracers in that movie were over the top. LISA You're baked during just about every movie you watch. How can you even form an opinion on them let alone remember them. JOE Well I can form an opinion on what I do remember. Geez let me enjoy my oblivion okay! Robbie reaches into the beer case and grabs two beers. He then passes one of them to Lisa. He seems kind of into her. ROBBIE So Lisa, what scary movie makes you scream? Lisa opens the beer and takes a swallow of it before she answers him. LISA Wizard of Oz! ROBBIE You're kidding me!? LISA (smiling at him) It's true! Those flying monkey things really freaked me out when I was five and they sort of still do. ROBBIE (laughs at her) That's crazy! LISA Hey I had nightmares for weeks after seeing it. They would fly down and started ripping me to pieces and then go after my family! I would wake up screaming and I'd have check myself in the mirror just to see if I was still in one piece. LUKE (takes the joint from Carrie) Flying monkeys were the only cool thing about that movie. JOE (lights up another joint) Hey man Dorothy was one luscious hottie. Problem is it should have been called 3 Gay Men and a Babe. MIKE Man you gotta lay off the weed. JOE No man listen... (glares at Lisa) Let me give you my opinion of the movie. See you got this hot babe out in the middle of nowhere and nobody even hits on her. They had to be gay, the lion was definitely tickling his sphincter with his own tail. LUKE (smoking the joint) Dorothy was pretty sweet in her nice long braids and country girl look. JOE See the dude knows what I'm talking about. Man I would have grabbed those braids, tapped that ass three times and she would never have wanted to go home again. Joe jumps up and starts humping the air and slapping his own ass. LISA You're a disgusting pig! JOE Damned right I am. Been a proud member since 1995. LISA (to Robbie) So which movie scares you? ROBBIE Being the only black kid in a white town there isn't much left that scares me anymore. But if you really want to know then I would have to say the scariest movie I've seen is Driving Miss Daisy. Everyone looks at Robbie. Joe coughs as he inhales on his joint. ROBBIE Well what do you expect! Black man having to drive a bitchy old white woman all over the god damned place. You do one thing wrong and she would have your ass. I'd be steering right at the first tree I saw and crashing into it. JOE (holding his fist high in the air) Amen to that my brother! ROBBIE (kidding with Joe) Fuck you, you white trash stoner. Everyone laughs and goes back to drinking. Sarah tilts her wine cooler up high over her head and finishes the last drop. She then tosses it over her head and we can hear it splash into the water behind her. SARAH Who wants another one? CARRIE I'll have one! LUKE Me too! SARAH Be right back. Sarah gets up off of Mike's lap and staggers over to the van to get three wine coolers. She tosses one to Luke and then another Carrie. Sarah then sits back down on Mike's lap. MIKE (to Luke) Man why do you drink those things? It's so gay! (a bit curious) You're not gay are you? LUKE Fuck you man, I get way more wasted smoking this shit than you do drinking that stuff. (showing his joint) Besides these things taste great and go down smooth. MIKE Whatever man! Hey Robbie pass me a real man's drink. Robbie digs into the case of beer next to him. We hear empty bottle clanging together as he searches for a full one. ROBBIE Hey what time is it? Joe tries to focus his eyes on his watch. He has to close one of his eyes but he can't so he puts his hand with the joint over it. He accidentally burns his forehead. JOE Ah shit! (drops the joint and Carrie quickly scoops it up) Goofie's big hand is at the twelve and I think his little one is.... I can't see it! MIKE (checks the time on Sarah's watch) It's 12:02 why? Robbie pulls out a beer and hands it to Mike. He gives a disappointed look at Mike. ROBBIE Cause this is our last beer. JOE (very upset) No way man I've got hours before I pass out! LUKE And don't even think of taking any of those coolers cause I paid for them. I wouldn't want you turning gay on me. MIKE Don't worry about it smart ass. (gets up and lets Sarah sit in his place) I'll drive into town and get some more. SARAH (begging him not to go) No don't go! I want you here with me. Let someone else go. Mike pulls keys out of his pocket and dangles them in front of Sarah. MIKE No way! Nobody drives my van but me. She has a way about her that only I know. Robbie sets his beer down and begins to get up. ROBBIE I'll go with you man. LISA (holds him down) No your not I want to keep talking. It would appear that Lisa might be interested in Robbie as well. Robbie doesn't complain and sits back down. ROBBIE Sorry man, the lady has spoken. JOE I'll go dude! I need to get some munchies! LUKE Yeah get some chips. CARRIE And some cookies and popsicles! Mike is walking around to the driver's side of the van. MIKE They'd be melted by the time we got back! Stupid stoner bitch! CARRIE (annoyed by his insult) Hey I heard that! MIKE (laughing) Good! (to Joe) You coming? Joe has gotten up but he is not headed towards the van. Instead he moves a few feet out of the circle and unzips his pants. JOE Give me a minute. I gotta take a piss! LISA Go in the bushes! I don't want to step in your stuff later! JOE I gotta see where my river runs. I don't want to piss on myself. LUKE You fuck, you'll probably end up passed out right in it. JOE Hey man you know how these things work. I could have a multi- directional thing going and piss right down my leg. That's not something I'm willing to chance. Joe continues to relieve himself while everyone tries not to watch but they still do. Mike waits impatiently by the door of his van. Finally Joe is finished and he does a violent shake to get the last drops out. LUKE Hey dude you shake it more than twice and its called playing with yourself! Joe doesn't say a word he simply raises his hand and gives Luke the finger. Satisfied, Joe zips up his pants and turns to face the others. JOE There, now was that so bad? No one has a chance to say anything as a long rope comes down from the tree above him. It is looped into a noose and it goes over Joe's head. JOE What the.... Suddenly Joe is ripped off the ground and disappears into the trees. All that can be seen of him is his twitching feet and the only sound that can be heard is a gasping noise coming from the darkness. They all just stand there frozen. ROBBIE Joe this better not be one of your jokes cause if it is, it's not funny! Luke walks over to where Joe was seen on the ground. He looks up at the feet that are no longer twitching. He reaches up and tries to grab them. LUKE Hey man are you...... Luke doesn't have time to finish his sentence as a dark figure comes out of the trees on a rope much like Tarzan would do but silent. The figure slams into Luke sending him flying into the huge fire in the middle of the circle. Luke catches on fire and begins to scream. Carrie begins to scream as well and tries to get to Luke but the dark figure has landed and grabbed her by the hair. She is trapped there as the man reaches behind his back and swings a huge axe down on the top of Carrie's head. Carrie drops to the ground with blood splattering everywhere. We can see her looking at Luke who is flailing around in the fire. ROBBIE (grabbing for Lisa) Let's get the fuck out of here! Robbie tries to get Lisa to safety but the man grabs her by the other arm. Robbie and the man begin a tug of war with Lisa as the rope. LISA Don't let him hurt me! ROBBIE Don't worry I've got you! While this is happening Mike runs back to get Sarah who is crying and screaming. She is too frightened to move. MIKE Come on we gotta get out of here! SARAH But what about them?! MIKE Who the fuck cares! Mike tries to get Sarah to move but she won't budge. MIKE Fuck you too then! He runs to the driver's side door but continuously falls to the ground as he slips on some the empty bottles strewn on the ground. As this is all happening we turn back to see that the man has won the contest and is now dragging Lisa to the water's edge. Lisa is kicking and screaming not giving up the fight but it is obvious who has the upper hand. We can see that Robbie has fallen flat on his ass with his legs propped up over a log. LISA Robbie! Help mmm...... The man grabs Lisa by the hair and plunges it under the water. Lisa does not stop flailing around but her screams stop and turn into bubbles of air escaping her lungs. Robbie finally gets up and rushes towards the man. ROBBIE Let go of her you mother fucker! The man sees Robbie coming and he replaces his hands with his big boot on the drowning Lisa. Robbie gets near the man and we suddenly see two flashes of light reflect off of metal in the man's hands. Two blades come out from there place at the man's sides and rip across Robbie's throat. Two huge gashes are left behind in a sort of x. ROBBIE Aarrgghh! Robbie grabs at his neck as blood spurts out all over him. He tries to say something but all that comes out is more blood. He crumples to the ground dead. The man looks down at Robbie and then at Lisa who has finally stopped flailing around. He takes his foot off of Lisa and watches her float there face down for a while. It is as if he's mesmerized by the way she is just floating there. SARAH (O.S.) Oh god please help me! The man instantly comes out of his trance and looks up to where Sarah is still sitting where she was. She hasn't moved making it so easy for the man to just walk up to her. CUT TO: VAN INT. Mike opens the driver's side door of the van and gets into the seat. He instantly goes for the ignition but realizes he hasn't got his keys in his hands. He begins to check all his pockets. MIKE Fuck! Where are they? CUT TO: CAMPFIRE We angle back on the man who has neared the fire and a smoking but still living Luke. Luke has manage to climb out of the fire and put the fire on him out. He's not looking to good but it appears he will survive. LUKE Why are you doing this man?! The man doesn't say a word, he just crouches down and with one of the knives he sticks it into Luke's chest. Luke does not survive. There is now only a few feet between the man and Sarah who finally gets it in her head to get the hell out of there. She gets up at the same time as the man and she races for the back of the van. SARAH Mike where are you!? CUT TO: VAN INT. We angle back on Mike who is still looking for his keys. He looks through the driver's side window and sees the keys on the ground. MIKE Yes! CUT TO: VAN EXT. DRIVER'S SIDE Mike jumps out of the van and grabs the keys off the ground. He jumps back into the van and slams the door shut. CUT TO: VAN INT. Mike is back in the van. He sticks the keys into the ignition and starts up the van. The engine roars to life and he revs up the engine. MIKE I am so fucking out of here! We angle on his front and we can see through the van and out towards the fire. We can see Sarah jumping into the van and crawling on the floor towards Mike. We can also see the man coming at them with the fire outlining him. SARAH Mike help me! Mike is putting the van into gear but when he hears his name being screamed he turns his attention to the back. Instead of putting the van into drive he accidentally puts it in reverse. MIKE Shut up! We're safe now! Mike hits the gas and they go in reverse towards the fire and the man. The man is slammed by the van and disappears under it. This unexpected mistake actually helps Mike and he is pleased but only for a second as he continues into the fire. MIKE Yes!! Oh shit!! Mike hits the brakes and the van stops with its ass end in the fire. The sudden stop throws Sarah backwards out of the van and into the fire. She screams as she is engulfed by the flames. MIKE Sarah! Mike is about to go to her when he sees a fiery hand land on the floor of the van. Then Mike sees the man's upper half come up from underneath the van. The man is all in flames as he pulls his entire body into the van. MIKE Oh fuck me! Mike turns his attention to the gearshift and puts it into drive. He once again hits the gas and the van moves forward. Mike looks into the back of the van hoping to see the man fall out but he has managed to get a grip and stay in. MIKE Why don't you die fucker?! Mike turns his attention back to the front and realizes he doesn't have any lights on so he reaches down and turns them on. The headlights reveal a fallen tree and Mike is heading right at it. MIKE Fuck! Mike tries to swerve away from it but it is too late. The van crashes into the tree and a huge branch goes through the van and impales itself in Mike's stomach. The man isn't able to hold on from this impact and flies passed Mike, crashes through the window and slams into the tree. He falls unmoving onto the hood of the destroyed van. MIKE (coughing up blood) At least you're dead too you son of a bitch! The man suddenly begins to twitch and he crawls off the hood on the passenger's side of the van. MIKE (as he dies) I don't believe this! The man walks around to the driver's side and looks at Mike who is slumped over the steering wheel. The man picks up Mike's head and looks into his dead eyes. He lets Mike's head fall back onto the steering wheel. CUT TO: CAMPFIRE The man is walking back into the light of the campfire. We can see the bodies of his victims strewn all over the ground. One of the bodies is still moving and we see that it is Sarah. She has crawled out of the fire and is trying to get away. SARAH Help me! The man stands over her as she tries to crawl away. He crouches down and extinguishes the last bit of flames on her back. He then turns her over so that she can watch what he's doing and so that he can see the horror in her eyes. He begins to unbutton his pants and zip them down. SARAH No please no! The man lowers himself down onto Sarah and he rips her shirt off. She turns over and tries to crawl away from the man but he just drags her back under him. The last we see of Sarah is her watch saying 12:08. We zoom out from this point to the entire campfire. All we can see is the back of the man. We can hear Sarah screaming as the man does things to her. FADE TO BLACK
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