2Final Draft, Inc. 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In the Case of Trailer Trash C. S. Eyepatch INT. SANITORIUM For Criminals - A COLD AND stormy EVENING Though the following is graphic in nature and horrific, the scenes should be created with comedy intended. Our prisoners will appear quite funny. Camera travels down the hall past doors of cells. We listen to the sound of prisoners yelling back and forth to communicate about such things as what is going on in court, and rap music is being performed by prisoners in the background to the song Fruit Loops by Jon Clemence (see attached lyrics; permission to use this has already been secured). We watch the passing of reading material and music to denote the mundane nature of the action. Prisoners hand books across the partitions between cells, throwing the books across the cells to the next bunks without looking up from the books they are reading, distributing them on to the next cell above and below in common exchange. All action stops when a very large prisoner says... Large prisoner Now, just you wait a minute here. (in a loud booming voice, changing to whimpering as he continues) I gave you the unabridged version of Dr. Hugo Von Twaddlemeisters theory of critical thinking and this copy of Quantum Physics 711 is missing the reference index. The camera slides across the path of book deliveries to a small mousey prisoner in a cell full of books which has stopped the exchange parade cold. He is looking at his cell mate, an odd-looking accountant busy counting cigarette packages and candy bars who now looks distressed, looking up from his count. Mousey prisoner Gosh, Bubba, that's the way I got it. LarGE PRISONER Well, OK, but when its turned in, I want it. Everyone takes a breath and the procession of books resumes. MOUSEY PRISONER We will make note, Bubba. LARGE PRISONER (nodding his head with compromise) OK. The large prisoner resigns himself to his bunk for a night of reading. A rap song is being sung by a man in one cell while others prisoners beat on the pipes, doors, bunks, or whatever they can to create music for the rapper. The song Fruit Loops by Jon Clemence is being performed while two sissy boys dance in his cell. The sissy boys gyrate to the music and provide the background vocal wile other prisoners do sound effects and make music in unison. The camera moves on down the corridor to a door which is plainly marked Detention for the Criminally Insane. The sign above the door says AREA 5150, with a large red warning light placed on the left yet part of the sign. The door is swung open after the phrase... 00020000067900000A1A673,MAN VO (V.O.) Clear! ...is heard. The camera continues down the corridor. Now the corridor contains full cells with doors instead of the cells with bars and slots on the doors to feed the prisoners inside. Small windows without glass above the slots are in the cells to feed prisoners. The walls are a hideous orange and light blue, with darker blue at the lower partition which makes you want to crawl through the corridor instead of walk upright. You can hear in the background what sounds like a drug deal that has gone bad as we listen to the voices of prisoners mad at one prisoner that he is holding out. Crazy man 1 (V.O.) (in voice like Edward G. Robinson) Our guys saw you take the stuff from your wife, see? You know, if you want us to protect you, youve got to play ball, see?! CRAZY MAN 4 (V.O.) (screams like a girl) No! No! Aah! CRAZY MAN 3 (V.O.) (trying to sound tough but is confused) You did not go in the can to throw it in the can, commode, crapper. CRAZY MAN 2 (V.O.) (in a gruff but lollipop kid sounding voice) Shuddup! If you dont come clean, were gonna have to check for ourselves. CrAZY MAN 1 (V.O.) (in voice like Edward G. Robinson) Tie him up, see?! Yeah! After a lot of loud tussling and effeminate screaming, things settle down. By this time, the cardboard in the first window falls to the floor to reveal an 85-year-old man sitting on a toilet and as the voice-over fades slightly, we hear the happy sounds of the old man mixed with the voice-over. CrAZY MAN 1 (V.O.) (in voice like Edward G. Robinson) Cut him, see? Dont just stand there! Crazy man 2 (in a gruff but lollipop kid sounding voice) Put a sock in it. 0002000008370000108D831,This is followed by screaming and a muffled, last, barely audible no! With continued voice-over talk through the following scene, we focus on the 85-year-old, smiling man who sits on the toilet with a ball point pen in hand. He has many body piercings. The man positions himself in preparation for what he is about to do and looks at the pen, crazy-eyed. He then makes a move with the pen toward his crotch, which is hidden from sight by a few towels. Moaning with delight, his head back, relying on feel now, he is attempting to push the pen through the flesh of his groin area (left to imagination, with no visual of the prisoners groan area.) He grunts with pain and, in his delight, throws his head back again and laughs with a crazy look in his eyes and a full jagged tooth smile. Then he lays the pen next to a small silver ring. The pen is covered with blood and some neatly-folded toilet paper becomes covered with large drops of blood from his fingers as he picks up the ring and struggles to affix it to his flesh. He then takes a towel and wraps it around himself. As he gets up, a large spot of blood develops on the towel. He rises to his feet as many pieces of jewelry start falling from the towel, smaller pieces at first but the items get bigger till two large iron balls drop to the floor with chains attached. His eyes get large when he sees the cardboard is missing from the window. The frail, old man moves quickly, dragging the two iron balls to the window. He replaces the cardboard so the cell looks empty again. The camera continues down the hall to the next cell. It intrudes on four men in a cell together. One is strapped to a bunk with torn bed sheets. He is a huge man who looks like he has been lifting weights for years and likes it. The other three are midgets that are dressed in red jump suits. Squatting on top of the huge mans chest with both feet just below the huge mans neck is a midget with a big cigar. The large man is conscious even though his intestines are draped around the three midgets who are discussing whether anyone has found anything yet. 000200000843000018BE83D,CraZY MAN 1 (who is the midget ringleader, indicates his chest area and sounds like Edward G. Robinson) How do you expect me to look out for a wimp that cant produce, see? You got nothing I need in here, you hear? CraZY MAN 4 (muffled through a wadded sock in his mouth) Mum...muff...um? CRAZY MAN 2 (in a gruff, lollipop kid voice) Shuddup, you mook! Crazy Man 2 begins digging around in the opened stomach of the huge man but continues to come up empty, despite digging deeper and deeper. The dialogue between the other three increases in speed and intensity. Shots become tighter and more distorted. CrAZY MAN 3 Youre worthless to me. CraZY MAN 4 (muffled, through sock) Mum...muff...um? CrAZY MAN 1 (Edward G. Robinson voice) How do you expect me to look out for you if cant produce? CraZY MAN 4 (muffled, through sock) Mum...muff...um? CrAZY MAN 3 (as the search continues) Heard of welfare reform? CraZY MAN 4 (muffled, through sock) Mum...muff...um? Widen cameras scope to show that one of the midgets have vanished while the ringleader jumps off the huge man. Then Crazy Man 2 sticks his head out of the huge mans stomach. CrAZY MAN 2 Nothin, Boss. CrAZY MAN 1 (in Edward G. Robinson voice) When they rack the doors, mugs, were out of here, see? The camera continues down the corridor to the next cell where the cell is marked with the simple sign Danger. Background voice-overs: the screams and loud talk throughout the hallway continues. Looking inside this cell, we see a prisoner sitting on the toilet. The shot is through the door to give us a full view of him and the toilet. Camera close-up on his face in the shadows as they do on those shows to obscure identity, aided by electronic voice alteration. On closer investigation, we see that this prisoner is chained with a neck restraint to the wall and is being kept on a short leash. His hands and feet are shackled yet he appears quite comfortable despite the fact the leggings are wrapped behind and under the toilet behind him. His face is in the shadows and his voice is obscured, aided by electronic alteration when he speaks. 00020000063E000020FB638,CK (trying to sound important) To quote one of the greatest filmmakers of all time, I would like to begin by wishing you all a... (imitates Hitchcock) Good evening. (a beat) The movie you're about to see breaks all the rules. In all great tales of mystery and suspense, you're supposed to be kept guessing till the very end who the bad guy, the criminal, the mastermind, the thief is. And it's always supposed to be the guy you least suspect. Well, this time the game will be played differently. It will be played my way. You will not have to guess how and why I became the madman I am today. Although I am seated in the shadows and my voice has been electronically altered, you will recognize me as this story unfolds. And when you hear how hard my life has been, how long-suffering, how excruciatingly unendurable, you may take pity on me and understand how I have become the most feared man of my time. Yet know that I do find some slight solace, some bittersweet comfort in the lingering knowledge that I will go down in history as the world's most remarkable...CEREAL KILLER! Ext. burbank - DAY Roll titles during a montage of scenes taken throughout Burbank, California, with liberties taken to include in the montage anything the upcoming dialogue makes reference to (i.e., editors choices permitted per notes.) Note: Must not be dated as much as possible. Use Studio gates, lot entrances, buildings that have some historical standing. We hear a parody of CSIs theme song (Pete Townsends Who Are You?) called Who Killed You? (written by Richard Radford; see attached song lyrics). 000200000A6600002733A60,CK (V.O.) (reminiscing fondly) Burbank, California...the Media Capitol of the World, home to Warner Brothers and Disney Studios, home to Universal and NBC. Great people have been born here, like Tim Burton, and great people, like John Ritter, have died here, too. I was born at a hospital where many star babies were born, except at first, I was anything but a star. In fact, I think I was the least welcome, unluckiest, most depressed and angry kid on the planet, and the rage started early on, beginning every morning at breakfast. Note: Footage of newborn crying moves to crawling to first steps, transitioning to kids raiding the cupboard for sugar cereals. CK (V.O.) Breakfast. The time of day when kids across America are climbing up to their kitchen cupboards to grab their favorite sugar cereals, pouring heaping bowlfuls splashed with fresh whole milk and the promise of a prize in every box. Have some more, their parents might say! OK, why not? their kids might answer. Mom, can I save three box UPCs and send away for this airplane? You bet, Billy! Anything you want! (a beat) Instead, I got oatmeal... INT. kitchen - early morning The sun is just coming up, as you can see out the kitchen window. A woman is in big, new fluffy slippers and a kid at table in the shadows, with items arranged in the scene so that the transition to the high chair is fluid. The kitchen has a radio that sits next to a toaster and mixer with a bread dough circular kneader. The shelves are all locked with kid-proof locks to keep out prying hands and eyes. The floor is linoleum. The stove is a very small four burner gas stove. The radio is playing news discussing traffic conditions and noting that this mornings freeway death toll is lower per hour today than in the past three days and down to only 7 an hour for the past two hours. The only sounds you hear is the radio news and the ever-present blub-blub of boiling, thick oatmeal. Focus switches from the boy to the radio, back to the boy who looks like he cannot bear another day, to the mom standing over the stove, to the radio, to the oatmeal bubbling, and bobbling as the Mom standing over the pan, still holding the spoon. Some of the oatmeal is not even wet on one side of the pan. We focus on the bowl being thrown down on the highchair tray. This highchair, which the boy is much too large to be in, has a lock on it to keep the boy in. Close-up: unflinchingly, the boy continues to stare off into the cold distance as the bowl of oats hits the tray. Close-up on the oatmeal in the bowl with a spoon sticking up at an angle, standing as solid as the Rock of Gibraltar in the icky goo. 0002000007D7000031937D1,CK (V.O.) Cold, unforgiving oatmeal. Not the fragrant maple kind or apple cinnamon stuff. We're talking cold, pasty, if-I-barfed-right-now it-wouldn't-look-this-bad, creepy cold, sticky oatmeal. MOM Eat it! ..she yells as she turns back to the stove and turns off the burner. She then opens one of the locked cabinets to reveal the treasures she will not share with CK, shelves filled with wonderful, sugary goodness; box after box of tasty, dry crunchy sugar-coated cereal. She grabs a colorful box and places it on the table for herself. CK (V.O.) (sarcastically and first words in unison with Mom) Eat it, my mom would say. It's good for you. Oh, I ate it, all right. I ate it 365 days a year, year in and year out, never once letting a single gloppy drop of it go to waste... MOM The kids in Africa are starving, you know. We follow Mom as she walks to the refrigerator, unlatches the lock, and pulls the door open to get the milk. On a plate inside the fridge is a mega-slice of pecan pie and a large apple fritter. Mom closes the door and the latch clasps back around the hasp as if it was programmed to do this. CK (V.O.] (sarcastically and first words in unison with Mom) Because the kids in Africa are starving, you know. She walks to the table and sets the plate down to open the milk and pour a tall glass. Camera back on young CK pulling the spoon out of the hard oatmeal to take a huge bite in anger and disgust. CK (V.O.) I swallowed it down... Mom gets the rest of the items to have her breakfast -- a large bowl thrown on the table, then a spoon. She sits at the table to pour a large bowl of sugar-coated goodness. She reaches for the sugar bowl and mounds heaping tablespoons of processed sugar on the already sugar-coated cereal. A large bite of the pecan pie, a sip of milk, followed soon by a huge spoon of sugar and sugar-coated cereal. Crunching loudly, a smile begins to develop on her face. This continues a as voice-over with montage as they both finish their breakfast. 00020000062D00003964627,CK (V.O.) I swallowed it good, swallowing along with it a rage that nestled deep inside me, where it festered like a slow-burning hatred. I nursed it throughout my childhood, and coddled it throughout my teens. Someday I would let it out when the time was right. It would have to come out, as all anger eventually does, in a bright, red-hot flash, a blinding explosion that forces you to cover your eyes. Oh, yes, that day would come and when it did, the world would stand back and watch helplessly, in horror. (a beat, philosophically) But forget the hatred for now. I'm tucking it away in that dark little pocket I call my soul so I can get back to the story of how my life unfolded. Montage of a prissy, slightly older CK seen at school in colorful outfits, colorful accessories and school supplies talking to girls about fashion, cooking, sewing. Arts and crafts, Theater and band are his joys. Dance class is a hit, but he is only really good at ballet. (Montage of classes including stage crew and school clubs. Jocks laugh at him and most popular girls think he is creepy.) Ext. Valley Girls Totally Cool fabrics CK arrives dressed in a fur-collared, brightly-colored sweater, riding a bicycle with a large basket, excited to do his shopping. He checks for his 1/2 off any purchase coupon, finds it, and stuffs it back into his pocket. He gets off his bike, sets the kickstand, and goes in. CK (V.O.) If you're lucky, you find out what you can do well early on in life. If you're unlucky and you're a guy, that thing you do well might turn out to be sewing. 000200000A1200003F8BA0C,Int. Valley Girls Totally Cool fabrics CK (V.O.) I was a strange teenager who hung out at the Valley Girls Totally Cool Fabric Store from the time I was 13 until I graduated high school. Nothing made me happier than finding the right fabric for my own designs which ranged in conception from inspired Elvis getups to evening gowns to what turned out to be my specialty... novelty costumes that served as perfect attire for Rocky Horror Picture Show events, Goth Rock parties or tamer fare like Easter Egg Hunts and Halloween celebrations. I was happily employed after high school at Halloween & Monsters, a Burbank store that caters to both kids who need to go trick-or-treating annually and TV/movie industry makeup artists. One day, I happened to make an acquaintance that would change my life. Int. halloween & monsters - dAY A woman enters and approaches the counter, where CK is busy at work, sorting out fake teeth. CK (V.O.) The day Desiree Davis walked into my life, I tried to recover gracefully from my stunned first impression that she was indeed more beautiful in life than shed ever been on the big screen by doing what any self-respecting yet nervous young man would do to hide his amazement and delight. I opened a package of fake teeth sitting on the counter and popped them into my mouth. I imagine I sounded like a cross between Bela Lugosi and Gomer Pyle when I spoke, but I had to work with what I had. CK speaks directly to Desiree (Caroline on C. S. Eyepatch). CK (sounds like Lugosi/Pyle) Vat do you think? Desiree has not come here expecting to be entertained but wants the best deal she can get, so she plays along. CK (V.O.) Desiree did the only thing I imagined she could do under the circumstances. She laughed and flashed a brilliant smile. Desiree With teeth like those, who needs to go to the dentist? CK (V.O.) I supposed it was a joke, even though I didn't quite understand it, so I laughed appreciatively. Of course, when I laughed, the teeth fell out on the counter, along with a thick gob of drool, but I recovered quickly and wiped the counter with my sleeve. Desiree laughs in disgust but is amused by the salesman. CK Can I help you? DESIREE Whats your name, big boy? Ck Casper. Casper Kolonic. DESIREE Hmm. With a name like that, who needs enemas? Ck Huh? Desiree I'm quite sure you can. I'm working on a show and I need a few things. (Desiree pulls the list out of her bra.) 3 fake eyeballs; a handgun; 2 quarts of fake blood; a knife, preferably 6 inches or longer; rope; a microscope; slides; test tubes; and a fake brain. 00020000064F00004997649,CK A fake brain? I'm not so sure that's a smart choice. Are you sure you wouldn't want to go with a real one? DESIREE Well, I would, but we're on a budget. (She continues, nearly inaudibly.) CK (V.O.) It didn't take long for me to find out that Desiree was working on a new show known for the dubious achievement of receiving the worst ratings ever for a new show within its first 2 months on HAX-TV. The name of this little bottom-feeder? CS-Eyepatch. Desiree, of course, played the main character, CS-Eyepatch, short for Caroline Sarah-Bellum Eyepatch, who was one of the leading forensic experts in the country. Every week, she and her trailer trash pals would park their big TRAILER in some cut-rate city, set up shop, and then sift through viable clues to resolve each episode's forensic puzzle. The real challenge? Since CS-Eyepatch was really a low-budget rip-off of another, 100-times more successful show on another network, everyone had to pitch in and do double-duty to get each episode completed. INT. starbuck-and-a-half - dAY Could be an actual Starbucks made over to look like a rival establishment, complete with blond wood, trendy coffee ware, and comfortable chairs. CK (V.O.) I offered Desiree, who was not only the show's star but prop-mistress-of-the-week, all the things on her list for free if she would allow me to take her to Starbuck-and-a-Half for coffee, and she agreed. (a beat) Over coffee, I learned that CS-Eyepatch needed a costume coordinator willing to work for room and board, and by the time we went back for toffee bars and seconds on our double espressos, I was hired. 000200000E2D00004FE0E27,CUT TO: INT. CKS CHILDHOOD HOME - bedroom - DAY CK packs his suitcases in anticipation of leaving and starting his new life. For the first time in his life, he will not be sleeping in the bedroom of his youth, decorated with nerdy toys and posters. An ancient sewing machine sits on a sewing table, with fabric and other sewing supplies. CKs suitcase is open on the bed. It is nearly empty. CK stands at his closet. He chooses a shirt, takes it off the hanger, folds it, and puts it in the suitcase. Then he goes to the sewing table, picks up the scissors, and puts them in the suitcase. His mother stands in the doorway with an armful of oatmeal packets, oatmeal cookies, and oatmeal skin-care soap. Every time CK turns away from the door to look in his closet or at the sewing table, his mother scoots over to the suitcase and takes out a sewing item, putting an oatmeal-oriented item in its place. CK pretends not to notice, but it is obvious that he is angry his mother is helping him. CK (v.O.) Being hired by CS-Eyepatch was a defining moment in my life which signified the turning of a corner onto a new street. I would never again return to my first home, my old neighborhood, or my old haunts again. Cut TO: I/e. mailboX SHACK CK narrates the following action as it takes place. CK (V.O.) In this episode of CS-Eyepatch, gunmen storm into a Mailbox Shack in the middle of the day. As it happens, the place is empty. A sign on the desk reading back at noon suggests that a clerk might come back later on if hes in the mood for clock-watching. One of the gunmen goes to the surveillance camera, hawks up a chunk of chewing tobacco, and puts the wet glob over the surveillance camera lens so their activity isn't recorded. The gunmen approach a bank of mailboxes and find Box 123. One gunman puts firecrackers in each of the 4 corners of the frame surrounding the unit of boxes while another gunman puts firecracker in the bottom right corner Box 123. A third gunman strikes a match to light the firecrackers, and all but one of the gunmen run outside. The only remaining gunman crouches down in the corner and sticks his fingers in his ears. (narrates through the following action) Cut TO: Cgi The camera zooms in on Box 123, then travels outward to show the perimeter of the bank of mailboxes. Then the camera centers on the sign will return in 20 minutes. Camera outside as pickup truck pulls up outside. Three men dressed in overalls get out of the truck with ski masks and guns. Gunmen storm into a Mailbox Shack in the middle of the day. As it happens, with surprise and disappointment the place is empty. A sign on the desk reading back in 20 minutes suggests that a clerk might come back later on if hes in the mood for clock-watching. One of the gunmen goes to the surveillance camera, hawks up a chunk of chewing tobacco, and puts the wet glob over the surveillance camera lens so their activity isn't recorded. The gunmen approach a bank of mailboxes and find Box 123. One gunman puts firecrackers in each of the 4 corners of the frame surrounding the unit of boxes while another gunman puts firecracker in the bottom right corner Box 123. A third gunman scratches a blue tip match on his overalls to light the firecrackers, and all but one of the gunmen run outside. The only remaining gunman crouches down in the corner and sticks his fingers in his ears. Camera on firecracker and shows what it looks like internally: (short CGI of firecrackers burning fuse and quick fade to white with explosion SFX) We follow the burning wick all the way to the point of explosion in cut out and in to CGI. 000200000A2A00005E07A24,I/e. mailboX SHACK After the firecrackers have gone off, the dust clears. The one gunman that is crouched in the corner is covered with junk mail. The box has been ripped out of the wall, and riffraff junk mail like PennySavers, grocery ads, and Ed McMahon sweepstakes notices litter the whole mailbox shack. This gunman is now covered with soot to from the explosion and has tattered cloths front only. CK (V.O.) In the middle of the scattered papers lies Box 123, glowing like the first shine in a baby calf's eye. The gunman who has remained inside the building jumps up opens Box 123 and puts the tobacco wacker in a gunny sack marked potatoes. After one last look around, he heads out of the Mailbox Shack and joins the others. (narrates through the following action) EXt. dusty roads - day Hokey fiddle music plays as the gunman leave the same way they arrived, courtesy of a pickup truck filled with hay and squealing pigs in the back bed. Well on their way, off down a dusty country road, police arrive at the Mailbox Shack from a different direction. I/e. mailboX SHACK The policemen scratch their heads at the mess they find. CK (v.O.) Second on the scene is the CS-Eyepatch crew. Sam Gruesome is Caroline Sarah-Bellum Eyepatch's know-it-all assistant. He's the one who makes sure he spells out whatever is evident to everyone on the scene. (narrates through the following action) SHot - angle on mailboxes Upon arrival of the CS-Eyepatch crew, the proprietor of the mailbox shack is equipped with a broom and snow shovel to attempt to clean the mess up. Caroline warns the proprietor that this is a crime scene and it cannot be disturbed. CAROLINE Did you know its a felony to tamper with a crime scene? Properietor That means youre going to take all this evidence with you? (smiling to get out of the job) Looking in at the mess on the floor. CAROLINE I guess well have to, now that I opened my big mouth. PROPERIETOR I sure hope you have a paper log maker. Sure wouldn't want it to all go to waste. (laughing as he leaves the mess to the pros.) Sam walks over to the blown-out bank of mailboxes and thinks for a minute. The close-up on the bank of boxes shows 122 and 124 intact on either side of 123. Note: list of characters, their relationship to the show and whether or not they speak with a Southern accent really or just for the show. SAM See what happemed ere? Firecrackies was stuck in each corner and they blew the middle box out. Caroline I wonder which one they were wantin'? (looking off to one side to denote the obvious) SHOT - CLOSE-UP ON SAMS FACE 0002000006840000682B67E,Sam looks thoughtful and stares up at the ceiling. WIDEN SHOT... To include the security camera that has caught Sams attention. SAM Well, looky here. We might have us a pitcher show. SHOT - WHOLE ROOM Sam drags a cow milking stool from the corner of the Mailbox Shack and drags it over to the camera which is mounted high, near the ceiling. He gets up on the stool. ANGLE ON SURVEILLANCE CAMERA A close-up on the camera shows a gloppy hunk of chewing tobacco half-stuck and drying on its lens. ANGLE ON SAM AND CAROLINE SAM Caroline, get your fine fanny over here and get us the tape out of this here camera. ANGLE UP ...as Caroline climbs up on the stool. The camera lingers on her butt, with Sam leering at it appreciatively. She is wearing those short farm-girl cutoffs that leave nothing much to the imagination. CAROLINE (disgusted) It's got stuff on it. CK (V.O.) The chewin tobacco was messy. At this point, Desiree, I mean, Caroline, got a big glob down her front, and they called me in to give her a fresh blouse, me being in charge of wardrobe and all. I certainly didn't mind, especially since she changed in front of all of us, including some guys who had to be called to the set for a look-see. (narrates through the following action) SHOT - WHOLE ROOM In a fresh blouse now, Caroline hands Sam the VHS tape which has supposedly come out of the security camera. caROLINE (sweetly) I even re-winded it for ya, Sam. Int. CS-Eyepatch trailer lab - daY The CS-Eyepatch Team examine the surveillance tape and see the gunmen enter, put a smear of chewing tobacco on the lens and beyond that, shadows suggesting movement and, of course, the explosion. 000200000E8000006EA9E7A,SaM That pitcher show tape don't add up to a wad of spit. Caroline looking at the wad of chewing tobacco on a culture plate shudders at the thought of handling the gross mass and grabbing a disposable hand towel to wipe her hands. CarOLINE That wad might can tell us somethin if we run it through DNA. Ill get Doc on it. INT. MAILBOX SHACK - day Ck (V.O.] Then, prints turn up at the Mailbox Shack... (narrates through the following action) The team Sam and Caroline lifts prints. They have brightly colored string stretched out from mailbox hole in the wall to each pice of blown out mailbox on the floor or stuck in the walls and are maneuvering around the room with sniffers and print kit consisting of supper glue and cellophane tape getting the tape stuck to the strings. One is taking muddy footprints with a fly paper sheet. One women at the door inform they know whos print that is. Flash fade to white, on milk delivery man leaving foot prints on carpeted porch and the woman, Flash disguisedly having to clean up the mess. Woman summons Sam over to tell him what she know. Sam walks through the strings and other crime tools to inform Caroline he know who the prints belong to and teases Caroline about her relationship, knowing him. CK (V.O.) The prints belonging to local Cheese Wizard Charlie Gross, a local dairyman in cahoots with major Dairy Kingpin Moo Dunlap. Cheese Wiz Charlie has disappeared, so the CS-Eyepatch team heads over to see Old Moo and milk some information out of him. (narrates through the following action) Int. Moos office - day Sam holds Moo in a camel hold while Caroline sits on his upper shoulders, pulling his head back with his sideburned hairstyle being long enough to grab hold of. She is screaming at him. Moo is in pain and loving it. Caroline is disgusted but continues to put the pressure on. Moo Oh! My God! Aah! Caroline If you dont tell us what we want to know, Im leaving. MOO No, keep it going! Ill tell you everything! CAROLINE OK, but you better start talking. (resolved to this means of getting information, shaking her head back and forth in disgust) CK (v.o.) Caroline is reluctant to question Moo because Moo used to date her aunt AND her mama AND her cousin, and she feels that her personal relationship with him might stand in the way of getting business done. It's left to Sam to do the questioning, and after he does, he gets to the bottom of the mailbox theft. (narrates through the following action) SHot On MAILBOX 123 A close-up on the box as hands reach in and remove the contents, a bloody tobacco whacker wrapped in a white towel. Beneath the whacker, a picture lines the bottom of mailbox 123. It is of a trashy-looking gap-toothed floozy and it is signed, Love, Selma. PULL AWAY SHOT As Cheese Wiz Charlie hands the bloody whacker and the photo to Moo. CK (V.O.) Apparently, a tobacco whacker used to kill local hoochie Selma Simms was hidden in Box 123 and Moo wanted Cheese Wiz Charlie to steal the box so Moo could get rid of the evidence. Cut TO: Ext. Bridge over a running river or stream - nIGHT Moo and Cheese Wiz fight to the death, but Moo clearly has the advantage since he is larger, stronger, and heavier. He drops Cheese Wiz. CK (v.O.) (narrates through the following action) To tie up another loose end, Moo decides to get rid of Cheese Wiz lest he should talk, and he kills him the same wacker he kilt poor Selma with, promptly disposing of one bloody tobaccy wacker and Cheese Wiz Charlie's body in the Old Mucky-Muck River. LONG-SHOT From a distance, in partial shadows or perhaps reflected, we see the two shadowed men. The larger man brings out the tobacco wacker and hacks the smaller man to death. 0002000006DA00007D236D4,ANGLE ON MOO As he drops a large tied bundle (the corpse of Cheeze Wiz) over the side of the bridge. We hear a loud splash. Next he drops a smaller bundle (the wacker) into the water below. CLOSE-UP ON PHOTO FRAGMENTS As the torn-up picture of Selma floats away on the night breeze. CK (v.O.) That episode, my first and the series' 12th, marked a new low for the show and it was decided that, in addition to handling wardrobe malfunctions, I should sit in with the staff writers and try to help them with their ideas. Cut TO: Int. TRAILER - DAY CK sits across a small table from two writers who clearly have contempt for him. CK (v.O.) Unfortunately that didn't work out too well either. The writers didn't like any of my ideas, and I felt all of their ideas consisted of ripping off the original forensic show which we were definitely trying to hitch our own wagon to in the theory that success breeds success, but it was obvious in our wannabe state of mind, we were just plain ripping them off, period, with no original ideas of our own. ANGLE ON CK During the upcoming action. CK (V.O.) I even accused them of stealing the eyepatch idea from Kill Bill, at which point one of the writers threw a pencil at me which hit me in my left eye and I was given sick leave, and an eyepatch for real, for the next few weeks. CUt to: INT. TRAILER - DAY CK, not at home at all in his TRAILER. CK (V.O.) The kicker was, sick leave consisted of being locked in my trailer with nothing but fabric and my sewing machine and those little TRAILER windows to look out of. I guess they thought if they really gave any of their crew members sick leave, they might leave and never come back. I was quite sure Quentin Tarrantino never treated his people this way. 0002000006C7000083F76C1,(a beat) As often happens in lockup, the mind starts to wander. (a beat) The first few days, I was fine. I comforted myself by working with cozy fabrics I had stockpiled in my trailer , plush velour, faux fur, and chenille, basically. Somehow, working with the softness of these fabrics soothed me like a favorite blanket. ANGLE ON CK At work, sewing on his machine, a small TV set within view, turned on to the news. CK (V.O.) While I worked at the machine, sewing aimlessly hour after hour, I would push fabric under the needle as I watched my tiny 5" screen TV. (a beat) Each night, after the news, I ate the meager dinner a crew member passed through my tiny trailer window like a guard might slip meals to a man in solitary. ANGLE ON SMALL TRAILER WINDOW It slides open and shut and is not large enough to fit through. Each time she shows to place food through the door we flash on the clock to show it is the same time each day. CK (V.O.) The first night, I got burgers, fries, and a diet cola from a local hamburger stand. The second night, I got spaghetti and meatballs, a big salad, and a bottle of diet soda. That third night, I got a veal cutlet, mashed potatoes, a shake and 3 large oatmeal cookies. That's when things start to get vague... FULL VIEW Of entire TRAILER, with emphasis on the sewing machine, where CK is seated, and the small TV, turned on to the news. CK (V.O.) I remember staring at the TV and watching a commercial for Energizer batteries. ANGLE ON TV SET The Energizer Bunny is marching across a linoleum floor, beating his drum. BACK TO FULL VIEW CK is enraptured with the Energizer commercial. He has a cookie on a plate in front of him. Beside that is a pile of white faux fur fabric. CK (V.O.) 000200000A6900008AB8A63,The Energizer Bunny was drumming his way across a kitchen floor, and I remember staring down at the cookie I intended to eat. Then I found myself staring at 2 large pieces of white faux fur I was sewing together. Then I saw something I wasnt sure I really saw at all. ANGLE ON REFLECTIVE TRAILER WINDOW Om is staring back at him. CUT TO: EXT. FRONT OF RESIDENCE IN dads TOWN, OREGON - DAY Parking in the driveway, a real crime scene investigator, Lou Slope, reaches across the seat of his car, grabs his CSI kit, gets out of the car and slams the car door shut, locking it with keys he then puts in his pocket. He walks up the driveway and as he does so, a detective crosses the front lawn to join him. The detective's name is Trevor Goading. TREVor Hey, Lou. LOU Hey, Trevor. Trevor We've got to stop meeting like this. (Both men laugh.) LOU What's the story here? Trevor One female victim, Caucasian. Probably interrupted a home robbery in progress. She still had her coat on and was probably coming home from the drugstore. A pharmacy bag with a prescription for Imitrex was found next to the body. You go on without me. I have to interview the neighbors. They apparently heard the screaming and called 911. FULL SHOT ON HOUSE AND HOUSE NEXT DOOR Lou nods, and Trevor heads past him on the lawn to the house next door. Lou approaches the front steps to the house and lets himself in. CUT TO: INT. RESIDENCE - NIGHT An officer stands guard over the body of the victim, who is lying on the living room carpet with a pharmacy bag and her purser nearby. She is fully dressed, but one shoe has come off and is lying nearby. Lou approaches the officer, whose name is Scott. LOU (addressing him) Scott. Scott (looking up) Lou. LOU Is the place cleared? SCOTT (nods) Yeah. LOU Good. ANGLE ON LOU As he looks at the victim, blood continues to coagulate beneath her from head injuries. Lou kneels down and opens his CSI bag, searching for something. SCOTT What are you looking for? LOU Camera. Must still be in the trunk. SCOTT No problem. I'll be right back. I need some fresh air anyway. WIDE ANGLE on room as Scott heads out the front door. Lou remains kneeling by the corpse, maintaining enough distance to preserve the scene. SFX Lou's cell phone rings. ANGLE ON LOU as he answers the call. Behind him, the double doors to a standing armoire creak open. LOU (answering the call) Lou here. (a beat) Hi, chief. No, they haven't arrived yet. I was gonna take some preliminary pictures before Joe gets here. Better to have insurance. You know how the film got screwed up last time. I don't trust him. (louder) No, I don't! I don't trust him to do the job right! 000200000BEE0000951BBE8,FULL ROOM SHOT The assailant, dressed in a full bunny outfit, steps out of the armoire, approaches Lou from the rear, and hits him on the head with a heavy object that somewhat resembles a glass paperweight. CLOSER ON LOU Lou goes down, falling across the victim on the floor. ANGLE ON FRONT DOOR Scott returns with Lou's camera. CK/BUNNY MANS POV OF REFLECTION IN SLIDING GLASS DOOR Om is staring back at CK/Bunny Man. FROM SCOTT'S POINT OF VIEW The man in the rabbit outfit turns and looks at Scott. He throws the heavy object he struck Lou with, in Scott's direction. Scott ducks and the object crashes into the wall. The rabbit-man then runs in the other direction, through another door, and is gone in a flash. SCOTT (screaming) Stop, Bunny Man! Stop! ANGLE ON DOOR TREVOR has returned from his interrogation with the neighbors. He stands there, puzzled, as Scott runs to the door the rabbit-man exited from. Scott stands there. SCOTT'S POV The rabbit man is long gone. FULL ROOM SHOT TREVOR and Scott acknowledge each other. SCOTT (to TREVOR) He's gone. TREVOR What? Who? ANGLE ON SCOTT He goes to pick up the object that was thrown at him with a latex-gloved right hand. With his other hand, he extracts a clear bag from his pocket and puts the object in the bag, leaving it open at the top. He examines the object in the bag. SCOTT Damned if it doesn't look like a... FULL ROOM SHOT TREVOR is curious now. He comes over and looks at what Scott bagged. TREVOR What color would you say that is? ANGLE ON SCOTT Holding the evidence bag up to the light. SCOTT I don't know. Raspberry red? TREVOR (shaking his head) No, more like lemon yellow. SCOTT (adamant) Orange orange, then! ANGLE ON TABLE ACROSS ROOM There is a bowl of glass fruit shapes in a clear fruit bowl. The men walk over to it. TREVOR It's a sculpted glass piece of fruit. SCOTT Like these. SFX Moaning is heard from the floor. ANGLE ON SCOTT AND TREVOR As they turn to notice Lou, moaning on the floor, on top of the crime victim's corpse. LOU (weakly) A little help here? TREVOR (scolding) Lou, what have I told you about contaminating the evidence? SCOTT Oh, jeez, Lou! CUT TO: INT. TRAILER - DAY CK is lounging on his hammock, daydreaming. The TV news is being broadcast at a subdued volume in the background. ANGLE ON LITTLE FOOD WINDOW - DAY Om is staring back at him in the reflection off the window but soon disappears as... Bang! CKs next meal is being delivered by Desiree. FULL ROOM VIEW CK goes over, slides the window open, and accepts the soup, crackers, milk, and cheesecake. CK Looks good. Thanks. CK TURNS QUICKLY Did he see something over his shoulder? Out the corner of his eye, we flash on the ghostly bluish image of the woman the Bunny Man killed. ANGLE ON DESIREE She tries to peek through the screen into his living space. DESIREE What are you doing in there, anyway? ANGLE ON FULL ROOM CK steps back and indicates the spare furnishings. CK (sarcastic) Im trying to decide whether I should take a quick dip in the jacuzzi or go shopping at the mall. 000200000C4A0000A103C44,DEsIREE (laughs) Well, 10 more days and theyll spring you, right? ANGLE ON DESIREE As she thumps twice on the side of the TRAILER as a sign of saying good-bye. ANGLE ON TRAILER She fades into the trees as she walks back to the set. CK (calling) Hey, hows the script for the next episode coming along? FOCUS ON CK His lonely face looks out the window. ANGLE ON REFLECTIVE TRAILER WINDOW Om is staring back at him. CK turns, moves his tray aside (he has no interest in eating), and he goes to lie down on his hammock again. He tosses and turns in a comical fashion, then realizes he must put something over the windows to darken the room. He grabs some fabric and shades 2 windows, then looks for more fabric to shade a third. He goes to his closet and opens it. There is a bunny suit inside and big dirty paw feet. He looks at the suit as though he is unfamiliar with it. CK (puzzled) What the... CK sits down in his hammock in the now darkened room. There is rustling outside which causes CK to look up sharply. CK (hoarse, whispering sharply) OM? OM, is that you? SFX - CKS REALITY The trailer lock clicks and CK hurries over to the trailer door and tries to open it. He cannot; his imagination is working overtime. CK (V.O.) Of course it was OM, OM. OM always showed up when I least needed OM around. It was always the case. OM would be trouble for me if Desiree would find OM in my trailer. I needed OM to go, I did not care where but the sooner the better. CUT TO: EXT. RESIDENTIAL AREA - DAY The actor who plays Sam Gruesome (whose name in real life actually is Sam) and Desiree, who plays Caroline on CS-Eyepatch, are on the set of their next episode, which consists of an actual home on a tree-lined street. The front yard of the home is everything they make fun of in redneck jokes, it's got the broken-down car, a couch, garbage, and enough junk to fill a swap meet, all piled up so high, you can barely see the lawn. The CS-Eyepatch directors name is John. JOHN OK, Sam, Desiree, make this one count. SAM Aw, come on, John, you know we can't do any worse than we did last episode. JOHN I hope you're joking. Last week's episode should have taken use through the roof in the Nielson ratings just for the pigs and explosives alone. Now we've got a new cameraman, and we're going to be fine, trust me! Take it again from the top again. (to the cameraman) Ready and...action! ANGLE ON CAMERAMAN The new cameraman, whose name is Art, is using a video camera that makes him scream "I need an upgrade!" in his sleep. He does not use a tripod but follows Des and Sam as they walk through the scene, with the camera balanced high, propped on his shoulder for support, at a level often seen in family home movies. We will cut to him often for that hilarious swing around to catch the other person saying their line action, and also the funny pan from head to shoes and weird angles never seen, say, on primetime shows but sometimes seen in a novices home movies. EXT. HOUSE - DAY CAROLINE and Sam walk up the sidewalk-challenged front path through the lawn debris. They rap on the rusty screen door, and a man named Walt answers. 0002000007BF0000AD477B9,CAROLINE CS-Eyepatch. Can we come in? walt Yep. I was wondering when you were gonna get here. INT. HOUSE - DAY The man, whose name is Walt, opens the screen door and lets them in. CAROLINE Youre Walt? Walt nods. CAROLINE The police are on their way. We're from the crime lab. SAM We're here as part of the investigation. You can call to verify that if you need to. walt No, no, that's OK. You come on in. CAROLINE You believe your wife is missing? walt Yep. Cant find Candeee anywhere. SAM That's her name? Candeee? walt Yep, with three Es. I was worrying about where she was... INT. KITCHEN - DAY Walt leads them into the kitchen. walt And then I saw this. Walt points to the floor at what looks like dots of blood leading in a trail into the other room. SAM Did you follow the trail? Walt Nope. Didn't have to. I know what it is. SAM You know it's blood. Walt Hell, no, it ain't blood! It's paint from the shed out back. Now, I know someone was in here and took it! I had 2 cans of the stuff right next to the fridge. CAROLINE Your wife wouldn't take the paint? Walt Hell, no. SAM Well, when's the last time you saw your wife? CLOSE-UP ON walt Walt scratches his head and goes over to the wall calendar. He flips back a month, then two. Walt August 14th. FULL ROOM VIEW Caroline and Sam exchange glances. SAM That was 2 months ago. Walt I know. We kind of go our separate ways. CAROLINE (to Sam) I'm going to take a look around outside. PAN AFTER CAROLINE As she walks from the kitchen through the front room, back out the front door, and over toward the junk on the front lawn. VARIOUS ANGLES OF CAROLINE Looking through the front yard garbage and heading over to the rusted out car. The cameraman gets a nice cleavage shot as she bends down to look inside the car. CLOSE ON CAROLINE She jumps back in disgust. We can only imagine the horror she must see inside the car, which we never get to see. Her scream is piercingly loud. CAROLINE Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! 0002000006CA0000B5006C4,CuT TO: Int. The worlds best & only breakfast sushi bar - day Musak is playing throughout the restaurant which has an Oriental flair to it, complete with cook and serve chef block tables where the chef of the table slices, dices, and cooks for those seated around the grill table while he stands and makes their meal. OVERHEAD SHOT as Chef Kenji cooks bacon, eggs, sausage and pancakes at a his station for a young couple who appear to be on a date. ROOM SHOT Very few people have arrived yet. A waitress comes up to Chef Kenji. Her name is Ann. ANN Hey, Kenji, you cooking that for them or for me? Kenji smiles but does not reply. ANGLE TO THE FRONT OF THE RESTAURANT From Kenji and Anns point of view, they can look out the picture window at the traffic and see whats going on. Right this particular moment, much to their surprise, Admiral Munch is crossing the street. ANN Looks like Admiral Munch is coming in for a bite. Hey, guys, its not Halloween yet, is it? Everyone laughs, including the chef. ANGLE ON GLASS FRONT DOOR OF RESTAURANT The bells jingle on the front door and Captain Munch enters. QUICK REVERSE - CK/MUNCHS POV Om is reflected in the glass inside. FULL ROOM SHOT Captain Munch crosses the room. He approaches the couple, the chef, and the waitress, and addresses the woman who is seated next to their date. ADMIRAL MUNCH Excuse me, ma'am. How are you? I'm Admiral Munch, but you can just call me Admiral. The man looks a bit alarmed. ADMIRAL MUNCH (CONTD) Hey, everything's cool. My mom said we could speak. How are you? The admiral takes a seat next to the man, adjacent to the lady. The samurai chef has begun to pile their plates with typical breakfast fare and sushi as the conversation unfolds. 000200000EB30000BBC4EAD,REDHEAD I'm sorry, honey. I already have a date. ADMIRAL MUNCH I see. DATE MAN (to the Admiral) Now excuse us. We were just beginning, The Admiral raises his hand in a gesture that implies the man ought to stop talking. The Admiral pulls out his own wallet (located somewhere on his uniform) and flips it open to reveal a cut-out panel from a cereal box. ADMIRAL MUNCH Heres my UPC license. You are officially excused. (he puts away his wallet and turns to the redhead) You know, I'm very interested. You eat eggs and bacon every morning? REDHEAD What if I do? ADMIRAL MUNCH Honey, I'm just looking for a straight answer as to why you come to this place, and believe me, I'll become the invisible man. Was it one of your parents who didn't know about good nutrition? REDHEAD Well, I'll admit, sometimes the sausage here does give me gas. Actually, super gas is putting it very mildly. The man on the date looks disgusting. He rises from his seat slightly and addresses the waitress. DATE MAN Waitress, will you please, ADMIRAL MUNCH (to date man) No, no, no. Eat your pancakes. Believe me, this woman is telling a very interesting story. Go ahead. REDhead Well, they always told me bacon and eggs were good for you and that a big breakfast was the best way to start your day. I checked the sodium charts. It's not true. Huh, how weird is that? ANGLE ON BREAKFAST SUSHI CHEF He is ready to attack the redhead in order to shut her up from revealing too much about the evils of bacon. REDHEAD (CONTD) Did you know that just one slice of bacon has, The chef at the sushi bar counter directly in front of table is within arm's length of the woman. With one swipe of his razor sharp blade, he moves in to slit her throat. Admiral Munch draws his sword and deflects the blade. The woman faints as the Date man runs for the door. REDHEAD (CONTD) Uhh! Before she slumps forward over her plate. FULL ROOM SHOT The waitress is screaming. The Admiral stands ready now face to face with Breakfast Sushi Chef Kenji. The Breakfast Sushi Chef grab the two large knifes in the rack on the cook cart. He wilds them like a samurai warrior making ready for the fight. CLOSER IN They engage in swordplay, with Admiral Munch inflicting several good stabs and jabs that create spurting blood holes in random spots on the Breakfast Sushi Chefs white chefs coat. Admiral Munch is a much better swordsman. He does not get stabbed or jabbed himself with the exception of a nick or two to his torso and arms that do not go deep and only create minimal blood spots. The fight moves around the counter where the Sushi Chef throws one of the knives into Admiral Munchs head. Being a costume, this has no effect but to excite Admiral Munch ADMIRAL MUNCH You will pay for that mate. Admiral Munch takes a long swipe with his sword and splits the Sushi Chefs cheeks so that the Sushi Chef looks like he has a big smile on his face. Continuing the pass with the sword to the cash register where the blade hits the keys and the sign pops up reading Cash Sell. Finally the Admiral grabs the Breakfast Sushi Chefs right arm, puts it behind his back, twists and throws him over the counter into the kitchen. Admiral Munch jumps on the counter and follows the Sushi Chef in. The Chef is regaining balance when the Admiral Munch slams his sword down on a Wok which flies in the air and lands on Sushi Chefs head making him look like a happy China man. Admiral Munch jumps up on the counter behind the Sushi Chef whips out his wallet again pointing to a card in his wallet. ADMIRAL MUNCH And this is my licence to Fry! Admiral Much jumps toward Sushi Chef and bends him over the grill block, pushing his face down onto the grill so that his skin is sizzling amidst the bacon strips. 00020000062D0000CA71627,SIZZLING CHEF Aah! BACK TO FULL ROOM SHOT Looking out at the street through the restaurant window, the Breakfast Sushi Chef who is now simply the Sizzling Chef, screams in pain so loudly that a unmarked police car drifting by outside slams on its brakes. WAITRESS ANN Kenji, thats Mark! Hell help us! I/E BREAKFAST SUSHI RESTAURANT As we track Ann running out of the restaurant, waving her arms. CuT TO: ANGLE ON REFLECTIVE RESTAURANT WINDOW Om is staring back at CK/Admiral Munch. Another glance, and the Admiral focuses on where Ann is going. He drops the Chef, who he has been repetitively holding and dropping onto the grill on the grill, leaving him for good, unconscious on the grill, doing a slow burn. Before he leaves, however, he lifts the Chefs hand, puts it on the grill beside the Chefs sizzling face, and in a single hack with his sword, he cuts the Chefs hand off at the wrist Admiral Munch raises the Chefs hand high in triumph before he turns to go. ADMIRaL MUNCH (slowly, with emphasis on each word) I just wanted you all... to...give me a hand! (a beat) Long live the Admiral! Viva la Munch! ANGLE IN RESTAURANT FRONT TO BACK With a flourish, Admiral Munch runs back toward the emergency exit off the pay phone/rest room hallway. He presses on the door bar marked fire alarm exit only. He slide his sword into the mechanism. The blaring of the alarm mechanism being disarmed fuses with the humming of the... CUT TO: INT. TRAILER - DAY Sewing machine, as CK sits there, sewing something fluffy. The clock on the wall shows that it is time for dinner. 0002000007060000D098700,I/E TRAILER Desiree comes by and raps on CK's window, which is near his sewing table in the TRAILER. He leans over and slides the window open. As the following narrative takes place, we see Desiree talking to CK in an animated fashion, pantomiming the latest episode of CS-Eyepatch for him while CK voice-over/narrates the scene. This can be interspersed with scenes from the episode as it was filmed earlier that day or the previous day, in recall/flashback mode, if desired. CK (voice over) Desiree was beginning to feel sorry for me, trapped inside the TRAILER like I was, but I had the strange sensation I had been living in another world, another time, another place, far away from the confining walls of this house on wheels. (a beat) They had just finished filming another episode of CS-Eyepatch where Caroline and Sam had to go to a guy named Walts house because his wife Candeee was reported missing. (a beat) The kicker was, Walt hadn't seen Candeee in months. By strange coincidence, the last time Walt saw Candeee was on the day their tax refund arrived in the mail. (a beat) Unbeknownst to Walt, Candeee called her twin sister Randeee and told her she wanted to go to New York City to see if she could make it as a model. (a beat) Randeee told Candeee she couldnt go to the big apple unless she went with her, but Candeee didnt want Randeee along for the ride. (a beat) The girls ended up having a big fight in the midst of the junkyard on the front lawn and Randeee speared Candeee with a pitchfork. (a beat) After dumping Candeee in the rusted-out car, Randeee split from the scene of the crime like a bat out of hell. (a beat) Considering the junk on the front lawn already smells so bad, its no wonder it took so long for investigators to find Candeees rotting corpse. 000200000C540000D798C4E,(a beat) Turns out, too, that the missing paint cans Walt was fussing about were pick up by a neighbor who left a note by the back door saying he'd repay him later... (a beat) But the note blew away and stuck to tree 3 houses down, the moral of the story apparently being that you're supposed to use tacks or tape when you want something to stay put in the wind. (a beat) As Desiree told it, it sounded like a mighty fine episode and I was sorry to have not contributed my wardrobe talents to the cause. ANGLE ON DESIREE DESIREE (enthusiastic) If this episode gets better ratings than the Mailbox Shack one, CS-Eyepatch will stay on the air for sure, and maybe well even get picked up for another season! Desiree stops for a moment and peers intently through the window at CK. He rallies to the cause to try and make her feel good. CK Well, your visit sure cheered me up, Des. Damn good to see you. Desiree I wish there was more I could do for you. CK I don't know what that could be. This TRAILER locks from the outside and I don't think you have a key. In fact, I think this damn thing has a refrigerator lock on it. Youd have an easier time getting into a casino bank vault. Temporary silence, as the sound of crickets or croaking frogs fills the air. Desiree (has a light bulb moment) I know! FULL ON DESIREE as she roots around in her hair and pulls out a bobby pin, holding it up for inspection like it is a wonderful surprise. Desiree (with determination) I'll use this. CK (voice over) I don't know why at that particular point it was so necessary for Desiree to actually come into the TRAILER and visit me when we were doing just fine talking through the window, but I wasn't going to argue with her. (a beat) The problem was, though, as she was bending down and trying to pick the lock to my trailer, I had the weirdest flashback of my mom trying to pick the lock to my bedroom while I watched from around the corner, on the staircase when I was younger. (a beat) Observance of boundaries between me and herself, well, there was no such thing. My business was her business, and that was all there was to that. (a beat) So, back to the point, while I was looking at Desiree, at first she was her wonderful self, and then, in a flash, it was my mom standing there. (a beat) I turned away for a moment and quickly looked back and she was Desiree again. (a beat) I turned away again and looked back, and it was my mother, merrily picking the TRAILER lock. (a beat) At first I thought it was a trick my eye was playing, since I was only being able to see out of my right one, so I took off my eyepatch and tried to see through both of them. (a beat) So far, so good. It was Desiree. (a beat) Then I put my hand over my good eye and looked out of my bad one. I saw my mom. (a beat) Holy Jesus! I didn't need a therapist to announce that there was something wrong with me. INT TRAILER Desiree pushes the door in and smiles, but soon her smile fades. DESIREE What's wrong? You look troubled. CK No, I'm OK. DES (uncomfortable) Well, could you put your eyepatch back on? I don't think your eye is healed yet, and it looks kind of, ANGLE ON CK 000200000B280000E3E6B22,CK Oh, sure. CK untwists the elastic band to the eyepatch and awkward tries to reposition it over his bad eye. When he looks again, his mother is sitting across from him. MOM So, CK, have you been a good boy? Are you doing a good job? Are they happy with you? (a beat) Why haven't you written to me? You know, I wait by the mailbox every day for a letter from you. (a beat) Or call! You never pick up the phone and call me! CK TURNS QUICKLY Did he see something over his shoulder? Out the corner of his eye, we flash on the ghostly bluish image of the woman the Bunny Man killed and the ghostly bluish image of Chef Kenji, with his garishly grilled face. CK TURNS THE OTHER DIRECTION No ghosts on the other side, but his mother is still ranting. MOM (CONTD) Have you been eating your oatmeal? I don't think you've been eating your oatmeal! (a beat) Where's all that nice oatmeal I packed for you? Where is it? (a beat) Show me! Show me! Show me! ANGLE ON CK spiraling into the depths of anxiety, he jumps up screaming. CK Aaaaaaaaaaah! Stop it, stop it, stop it! REFOCUS so we see Desiree sitting across from him. CK (voice over) In that moment of panic, I completely snapped, and I knew it. Desiree, a woman men would die for, was sitting across from me, looking concerned, and all I heard coming out of her mouth, which couldn't be coming out of her mouth at all, was... CLOSE-UP ON DESIREE Her mouth is moving but doesnt match what CK hears. DESIREE (concerned) Oatmeal? Oatmeal, oatmeal, oatmeal? Oatmeal, oatmeal, oatmeal, oatmeal, oatmeal, oatmeal, oatmeal, oatmeal! FULL ROOM we follow the action as he narrates it. CK (voice over) I pushed her out of the TRAILER and slammed the door behind her, leaving her standing there, looking confused and hurt, before she slowly turned and walked away. ANGLE ON DESIREE walking away from CK's TRAILER, looking down, confused and dejected. Flash on CK and Desiree having a normal Ozzie and Harriet dinner together. Flash on CK in trailer picking up his Crown Royal for a drink and tension mounting. Flash on OM sitting at the table with CK. CK (VOICE-OVER) (cont'd) I knew there was only one thing that could alleviate the pressure I felt building in my skull, revenge against all the people who ever ate sugar cereal for breakfast, revenge on all those people out there who grew up in normal, loving families with supportive and non-intrusive parents, revenge on all the people who never had to eat bowls of oatmeal for breakfast, day in and day out, every month of every year while they were growing up, revenge on those who were able to lead ordinary lives and make ordinary house payments and pay ordinary tuitions to ordinary colleges for their ordinary offspring, who in turn gave birth to the next generation of ordinary people, all of whom I despised with my entire heart, soul, and being. 00020000062E0000EF08628,ANGLE ON CK'S CLOSET as he goes over and opens it, we see the rabbit costume, the Captain Munch costume, and an assortment of oddities packed into the small storage area. CK (voice over) Feeling particularly adventurous as the evening approached, I wondered if I dared to commit not one, not two, but three crimes in a single evening. Could it be done while evading capture? If I could pull it off, OM would be so pleased. All I had to do was wait for sunset; then Id be free to head out into the dark, demonic night. CUT TO: OUTDOOR CAMPFIRE The cast of Trailer Trash CS Eyepatch sit around a campfire, eating weenies and marshmallows while doing a line read-through. Director John is rejoining them after having been away from the campfire for a short bit, so he walks up, chooses a chair, and sits in the circle with them. John is quick to regain control of the group in his confident, self-assured manner. JOHN Thanks for waiting for me, people. OK now, this is a read-through. You don't have to have your lines memorized... DESIREE (finishing the sentence for him) Yet! There is laughter around the campfire. JOHN OK, Sam, take it from where you say, "This is no toy, Caroline. (a beat) EDPL stands for electrostatic dust print lifter, and its gonna tell us who the kitchen killer is. We just gota get this thing down on linoleum and let it do its thing." ANGLE ON SAM as he starts to repeat the line... SAM This ain't no toy, Caroline. EDPL stands for electrostatic dust , JOHN No, no, no. Be more patient with her. She's learning from you, for Christ's sake. 00020000077E0000F530778,(a beat) You love teaching her new things. SAM Yeah, baby. And as soon as were done here, Id be glad to be your personal tutor and teach you some Sex Ed. homework. FULL VIEW OF CAMPFIRE circle with the trees beyond the campfire somewhat out of focus, blurred. The men around the campfire chuckle and Desiree lobs a burnt marshmallow at Sam's head for his remark. The burnt marshmallow land on his head. CUT TO: InT. TRAILER - NIGHTFALL CK is standing in front of his mirror in his tiger costume, but he is also wearing John Travolta Stayin Alive Italian clothing so he can parody Travolta as he dresses for a night of dancing at the club, gold chains and all. He can even hum Saturday Night Fever music if we can get away with it. Everyone knows that classic scene where John preens prior to his night out on the town, making sure he looks perfect and every hair is in place. CK does a bit of a Saturday Night Fever dance move and goes over, zips up a fat duffle bag, slings it over his shoulder, and he takes... ONE LAST LOOK In the mirror and sees OM. OM POV sees himself in the mirror and The Saturday Night Fever/Tiger standing near it. ANGLE ON DOOR - CKS REALITY The handle rattles. CK drops his duffle bag and runs over to the door and tries the handle, but it will not open. CK (urgent, hushed) OM! OM, is that you? OM! There is no response. Slowly CK backs away from the locked door. He once again picks up his duffle bag after one last glance of appreciation regarding how perfect he looks in the mirror, and he does a quick retake as he once again catches OMs reflection. CUT TO: EXT. TRAILER establishing shot The night, with the campfire in the distance, barely visible through the trees. FROM CAMPFIRE POV We see CKs tiger face as it appears through a clearing in the dense trees and foliage, with the lights from the trailer windows shining behind him in the distance. through the trees 0002000007320000FCA872C,CK starts to make his getaway tiger on tiptoes, careful not to make a sound. CUT TO: Ext. The CAMPFIRE Where the cast and crew are still rehearsing. JOHN OK, Des, take it from where you enter the room and ask Sam what hes doing. DESIREE OK. (a beat) Sam, what are you doing? SAM (in character) What the hell does it look like Im doing? Im trying to get marshmallow out of my hair. Their voices fade and the camp fire blurs as we now focus on the trees in the distance. Tony the Tiger is sneaking through the woods with his huge duffle bag. TONY THE TIGER'S POV as he walks, we are somewhere behind him or over him, or simply with him as he skirts through bushes and trees. CK/Tony (V.O.) I had to be quiet and I had to move fast. (a beat) I plotted my third crime even better than I had planned the bunny caper or the adventures of Captain Munch. I had heard of a Disco Club on the far side of town where wanna-be Goth kids got together and danced to songs from the seventies. (a beat) Youve got to understand that this was more than a crime of impulse; it was a part of my irrefutable destiny when the headline in the daily news no longer appeared to my faulty vision as Hall & Oates but rather, The music of Hall and Oates-meal will be celebrated this Saturday night! Dont miss it! CUT TO: EXT. DISCO WORLD - NIGHTFALL CK/Tony approaches the club doors and sees the bouncer standing there. There are windows inset in the club doors. REFLECTION IN INSET WINDOWS - CK/TONYS POV He sees OM. OUTSIDE THE CLUB CK/Tony and the bouncer stand there. CK/TONY (V.O.) The bouncer must have only had a third grade education at best, more brawn than brains and then some. I asked him if there was a back entrance and he stupidly walked to the side of the building with me and pointed around the corner. I thanked him and was on my way. 0002000006BF000103D46B9,BOUNCER Hey, cool costume, dude! EXT. DARK alley CK/Tony comes around the corner and crouches down by a dumpster. A young man and woman dressed in black Gothic garb and makeup have come out of the club and are having an argument. The main focus is on them instead of CK right now. WOMAN Well, if you want to dance with her instead of me, then freaking go ahead and dance with her! MAN Who said I wanted to dance with her? Did I say I wanted to dance with her? WOMAN You didnt have to say it! I know you like her, so go the hell ahead and dance with her! See if I care! MAN Well that sound just fine! The man turns and renters the club. FOCUS SHIFTS TO CK/TONY He is looking down at his duffle bag. He unzips it and roots around for something in its depths. CK/TONY (V.O.) It was one of those arguments you cant understand if youve entered in the middle of it, and you probably wouldnt want to understand it even if you could. CK/Tony finds what he is looking for, his fake fangs. He slips them into his mouth and pulls out a small hand mirror to make sure he looks just right. FOCUS SHIFTS TO YOUNG WOMAN Who is now alone in the alley, crying and muttering to herself. WOMAN Damn him, anyway! Let him go! I dont need him. She looks up and screams at the back entrance door, now closed, as if he could still hear her. He obviously cant but she doesnt care. Woman opens the door to the club and yells through the door then slams it. WOMAN (CONTD) Aidan! I dont need you, Aidan! I dont NEED you! ANGLE ON CK/Tony as he stands up and comes around the side of the dumpster. He has left his duffle bag carefully hidden by the dumpster in the shadows. CK/TONY Hi there. FULL ALLEY As we see CK/Tony approach the girl. 00020000080600010A8D800,CK/TONY (CONTD) Whats your name? The girl turns and begins to smile at him. CK/TONY (V.O.) The girl didnt seem too fazed by my appearance. Perhaps shed seen stranger things than me, what with Goth horror being the norm in her life and all. The girl approaches CK/Tony and runs a black-fingernail-polished index finger through CK/Tonys chest hair and plays with one of his gold chains. WOMAN (seductively) Im Vicky. Whats your name, tiger? CK/TONY (with an Italian accent) Anthony. Anthony the Tiger. VICKY Well, Anthony the Tiger, are you here tonight to dance or get a little action? She backs up a step or two and strikes a pose which is more pathetic than alluring. VICKY (CONTD) You like what you see? CK/TONY (emphasis on the GRR in GREAT like the real Tony the Tiger) Youre GRRRRRRRRRRREAT! Vicky giggles and CK/Tony lunges at her, sinking his teeth into her shoulder. Two bright red geysers shoot out of her shoulder and as she turns her head toward the wound being splash in the face and eyes with her own blood. She sees shes spurting blood, she screams in horror and makes a dash toward the back door of the club. She runs into the door and tries to find the knob but with a the blood and the confusion screaming she turns to run the other way right back into CK/Tony. CK/Tony strikes a pose with one hand on hip and one in the air pointing up and down as he moves his hips. CK/TONY Staying alive Staying alive Staying alive. Vicky turns and runs the opposite direction, to the opening of the alleyway, but there is no exit at the back of the ally blocks her. The spurting continues as Vicky tries to get past him but is blocked every time. Eventually, she slows down and collapses, dead eyes staring glassily up at the night sky, at no one, at nothing in particular. The alleyway is a river of blood. CK/Tony walks back to his duffle bag, pops his fake fangs out, and starts to undress. CUT TO: INT. BINGO HALL - SAME NIGHT The general hubbub of the Bingo Hall is in progress as the caller calls out the numbers for the crowd. 0002000006330001128D62D,A big sign at the front of the room where the caller stands reads: Tonights Pot = $1,000! We pan around the room till we focus on two competitive old ladies, both with so many cards to manage they are having trouble keeping up with the caller. CALLER B-9! Everyone scrambles to mark their cards. We continue to pan the room. CALLER (CONTD) G-7! CLOSE ON TWO LADIES We focused on when we first came in. The one lady, whose name is Lydia, looks seriously distressed and she stands up. Her companions name is Ida. LYDIA Play my cards, Ida! Ive gotta go! (intensely, under her breath) FOCUS ON CALLER, FRONT OF ROOM He notices her stand up but is not alarmed yet. CALLER O-2! BACK TO THE LADIES Ida and Lydia are ready to have it out. IDA (angrily) Im not watching your cards! Ive got my own to play! Just wait till the break! FOCUS ON CALLER, FRONT OF ROOM More heads are turning, but no crisis yet. CALLER N-5! FULL ROOM As Lydia stops the show by screaming at the top of her lungs. LYDIA (shouting) Who wants my cards? I gotta GO! A general hum and murmur fills the room as Lydia jumps up and dashes out the door. Ida breaks the ice. IDA I always knew she was full of it. The room breaks into a general sense of relief and laughter. INT. BINGO HALL HALLWAY - NIGHT Lydia rushes to the can. She enters, but it seems all of the stalls are locked as she pushes on each one. CK (V.O.) It couldnt have been more perfect if Id planned it. I expected to catch someone on the way out, after the game and was prepared to wait, but this was my lucky night and I was ready for action. 000200000C27000118BAC21,Lydia is pushing on the stalls, whining. LYDIA What the hell is going on? Is anybody in here? She bends down as best she can and sees green stockings and elf shoes. She hears the flush and the door swings open. LYDIA (CONTD) What in the Sam Hill is... I/E CLOSE UP ON STALL CK, dressed as Lucky the Leprechaun, opens the stall door and walks through Lydia in a hurry swings open the door to the stall, and as he passes Lydia on the way out switches places with her... CKS POV - IN THE BATHROOM MIRROR CK sees OM standing in the stall. I/E CLOSE UP ON STALL Now Lydia is inside the stall and CK/Lucky stops, turns blocking the way out courtesy of one stiff shove. This is the handicapped stall so there is plenty of room for CK to follow her in. Ck drops an H shaped piece of metal down between the door and jam locking the stall and making escape more difficult. INTERIOR - STALL - MOVING IN CK/Lucky turns to address his prey and pulls a Celtic dagger from his belt, pointing it at Lydias throat. CK/LUCKY (like Clint Eastwood) Tell me, shan man, you feeling lucky? The woman, eyes bulging as she begins to wet the floor through her spandex slacks. This has no effect on CK as he continues to hold the dagger to her throat and she sputters. LYDIA (begging) Yes! I mean, of course! Ive won the jackpot here three times already! You dont have to kill me! Ill win tonight and Ill, Ill give it all to you! CK/Lucky, considering. CK/LUCKY Ay. Tis just one thing you be telling me first, what pray tell, you be having for breakfast? LYDIA T-t-today? CK/LUCKY (sarcastic) Blimey, last Monday, tis today is it not? Lydia is panicking. CK/Lucky grips the dagger and pushes it forward enough to make an indentation in her throat. A small trickle of blood starts to fall. She is going to pass out. Finally, she squeaks out her answer. LYDIA (dramatically) Maypo! This stops CK/Lucky cold. CK/Lucky Now let the truth be known shan lassie... (CK whistles as though calling a dog to get her attention) Jus what be Maypo? Lydias eyes start to fall back in her head as she says... LYDIA (begging) You know, its hot cereal. Maple flavored? CK/LUCKY (Suspiciously) Shan-man, tis not oatmeal? LYDIA (horrified) Oh, no! CK/LUCKY Deadly bright! (CK out of chatter) Wrong Answer! INT. STALL CK/Lucky pushes the dagger through the womans throat. The blood starts flowing into the toilet which is no longer filled with water but is now a coagulated mass of blood red wet oats. He pushes her face into it and the oatmeal bubbles once, twice, three times, as she finally expires. He lifts the metal makeshift lock to exit the stall. CK GLANCES UP FROM THE TOILET Upon his exit of the stall CK/Lucky sees the ghostly bluish images of the woman Bunny Man killed, the chef Captain Munch killed, and the young woman Anthony the Tiger killed in the bathroom in front of him and the mirror behind them reflects their back with OM starring at him and no reflection of himself. They all join in a jig as they dance you see CK/Lucky in the room but not in the reflection in the mirror. In the mirror you see OM instead. 0002000008F6000124DB8F0,FULL STALL VIEW CK/Lucky stands and picks up the womans purse. He takes it over and dumps it upside down on the bathroom sink. He opens the ladys coin purse and pulls out a wad of cash. CK/LUCKY (chortling with glee) Magically delicious! He grabs his duffle bag from under another stall and heads out into the hallway. He looks both ways. The Bingo caller is still calling numbers in the other room and the coast is clear. CK/Lucky heads through the doors at the end of the hall and heads out into the night. EXT. PARKING LOT NIGHT Still dressed as Lucky, CK gets into a hearse and starts the engine. CK (V.O.) The third crime for the evening was going to be a little tricky, literally. I needed to cruise the red light district and pick out a local ho just right for the job. EXT. STREETS NIGHT CK is driving, cruising, and hits the red light district. CK (V.O.) I knew I was in the right part of town when all I saw were women in short skirts hanging out on street corners. CK checks the rear view mirror. The ghostly bluish images of the young woman Anthony the Tiger killed and the old lady Lucky the elf killed are sitting in the back seat, along for the ride. FRONT VIEW OF CAR LOOKING IN CK slows down at a corner. An African-American prostitute calls out to him; she cant see him too clearly in the dark. HO Hey, handsome! She strolls over to the car as she is talking. HO (cONTD) You want to get... (significant pause) Lucky? The both laugh. HO (CONTD) Well, Looks like you already did. CK/Lucky crooks his finger and indicates that she should come closer so he can talk to her. CK/LUCKY The truth be told , I be looking for someone whos game to do somethin a little magical lassie. HO Magics not a problem, honey. Magics not cheap. CK/Lucky slides over and whispers in her ear. She steps away, looking a bit puzzled so we dont know if shes going to agree or not. CK/LUCKYS POV - HEARSES REAR VIEW MIRROR CK/Lucky sees OM on the street. HO Well, thats quite a party, little man. Sure you can afford it? CK/Luck pull out the wad of cash taken from the old woman and flashes it. OUTSIDE - ON THE STREET After a moments hesitation, the prostitute shrugs good-naturedly and gets in CK/Luckys stolen hearse. He pulls away from the curb and drives down the street. 00020000086A00012DCB864,CK/Lucky (V.O.) Getting her in the hearse I boosted from the parking lot at a local funeral home was no problem and I was beginning to get a tad excited. I had a taste for some strawberry and chocolate goodness. EXT. Lovers parking AREA on a hill CK/Lucky parks the hearse above the town at a public parking area used for teenage petting. The stop has a building that offers mens and ladies rooms on each side. CK/LUCKY (V.O.) We drove to lovers lane a rest stop off the highway and parked above the town where we could see the lights. I told her I had to slip into something more comfortable. She laughed and said she would wait, so I got out of the hearse, grabbed my duffle bag and headed to the mens room. PROSTITUTES POV As she watches him go into the mens room, we focus on the dashboard in the car and watch as she reaches out to turn on the hearse radio and flips through music stations. Song to be used must connote monsters. CK enters the bathroom. Flash on ho in car moving to the music. Flash on duffle being stuffed with CK/Lucky suit and show him standing with his back to the camera, wearing a long cape. CK/COUNT (V.O.) It didnt take me long to change, and the good news was, I was able to recycle my fangs I had used as Anthony earlier... after washing the Goths blood off them in the sink. A GLANCE IN THE REST ROOM MIRROR Camera on CK/Counts back bent over the sink. Close-up on his hands which has blood on his hands and the teeth as he washes away the blood removes the fangs from the sink to rise up and introduce CK/Count Strawbula in the mirror. Flash change reflection to see OM. EXT. REST ROOM CK emerges from the rest room dressed as Count Strawbula. The prostitute starts to scream with laughter when she sees who/what is approaching the hearse. The Count is outraged! How can she be laughing. He storms over to the hearse cape flaring in the wind and yells at her. INT. HEARSE As CK/Count joins the prostitute in the hearse, taking the drivers side. CK/COUNT (with a thick Transylvanian accent) Vat the hell is vrong vith you?! The prostitute laughs harder but finally controls her laughter enough to speak. 000200000D400001362FD3A,HO You look, you look, ha ha ha! You look like that dude from Sesame Street! (choking with laughter) CK/COUNT (Transylvanian accent) You think Count Strawbula is vunny? I vill teach you not to lav! HO Sure, its your money, honey. Ill get it right when we get right. Pointing at the bulge in his pants. CK/Count reaches into his pocket and pulls the money out of his pocket and motions toward the back of the hearse. The ho reaches for the cash and pulls it away from CK/Count. She begins to count it, smiling. HO One Benjamin, two Benjamins, three Benjamins. As she continues to count, she laughs and then stops herself. HO Oh, baby! You have bought yourself one sweet party. Ill be good. Ill be your best ever, you little sucker-vampire, you. CK/Count motions for her to get in the back of the hearse and she turns in the seat to climb over it. She gets in the back and finds that there is a coffin in the back. This sobers her up right away. BACK OF HEARSE CK/Count swings the back door open and stands with the lights from the bathroom building behind him, looking into the back of the hearse. He spreads out his arms, looking like a bat silhouetted, standing at the back of the hearse. The ho grasps the casket inside. Then, realizing she is holding the casket, she moves away from it. We hear the sound of the door shutting, and now CK/Count is inside. The prostitute speaks up quickly. HO You want to... (a beat) Do it in there? CK/Count is now the one with the smile, in the back of the hearse. HO (cONTD) I mean, its empty, right? CLOSE ON CASKET In back of hearse. The lid creaks as CK/Count raises the lid, which has hinges. CK/COUNT (Transylvanian accent) It vont be soon. Climb in, vill you? HO Lover, you take all the time you need, but you just get one shot. Relieved to see there is no corpse, she does as he asks. CK/Count pulls a large black plastic cover off a large drum which has a sign on it (milk) and a crank pump on the top. Stacked next to the drum are many boxes of cereal. Each box is neatly opened with the top removed for ease of use, and everything he needs is at hand. She begins to undress and CK/Count stops her. HO Well, I've washed out worse, lover. He brings out some Count Strawbula cereal and opens it, after waving it under his nose a few times and nearly fainting from its sweet smell. He pours the box of cereal over the prostitute lying in the casket, then repeats the process, box after box, during which time she is singing the song on the radio, as he basically covers her with cereal till there is a mound exceeding the edge of the box, leaving only her face showing, as though she is buried in sand at the beach. Then he brings the nozzle from the drum marked milk and begins to pour the milk over the woman and the cereal. The milk turns blood red when mixed with the cereal. Some of the comments and questions she is asking as he buries her include... HO (while pouring the milk) Boy, you really know how to milk a good situation... So, have you always had a thing for dressing up?... Is this your hearse?... When did you figure out this sort of thing turned you on?... Do you have a real name?... Are you from around here? All of her questions go unanswered, of course, as CK/Count is very intent on his work. All of a sudden, a police siren whoops outside the hearse and police dispatcher chatter is heard. A car door slams. 0002000006AB000143696A5,The Count stops, freezes. CK/Count turns off the radio from the controls in the back of the hearse. He needs the prostitute to be quiet. He slams the lid to the casket and we hear a huge CRUNCH as the pile of cereal mashes her down and keeps her quiet (there is no breathing room left). The Count sits on the lid of the casket and listens as he hears the conversation outside between two policemen. The windows of the hearse are very darkly tinted and they cannot see inside. Policeman 2 Can you see in. POLICEMAN 1 Dont see anyone, do you? POLICEMAN 2 Nope. POLICEMAN 1 Kids. Probably took it out for a joyride and left it here. POLICEMAN 2 Yeah. Football game. POLICEMAN 1 Want to call it in? The handles to the back of the hearse rattle and one of the officers pounds on the back of the hearse. POLICEMAN 1 Im telling you, Jack, kids just ditched it again. POLICEMAN 2 (reluctant) I guess. Eager to be done with this and get out of some paperwork POLICEMAN 1 Well go get Richter and drive him out here. Im sure he has spare keys. And well follow him back to the home, just in case anything goes wrong. Their voices fade and CK listens as the police car pulls away. CK/COUNT (V.O.) That was too close a call for my liking. INT. hEARSE CK continues to narrate as we watch the scene unfold. CK/COUNT (v.o., CONTD) I opened the casket and found the woman I had picked up was no longer breathing. I wiped the crushed cereal gently from her brow, putting the plastic down to cover the floor, and rearranged things for a little surprise. She had not died as I planned, but there was nothing I could do about that now. Strange that I the feeling that this was going to even better than I had hoped. 0002000009BD00014A0E9B7,Close on front seat as CK/COUNT climbs over the seat to and reaches back to finish the touches for later. As CK closes the door on the hearse. CK/COUNT (v.o.) I got out of the hearse... EXT. HEARSE NIGHT CK gets out of the hearse. CK/COUNT (v.o.) And went back in the rest room with my duffle bag. CUT TO: INT. MENS REST ROOM CK is cleaning himself up. There is rustling outside which causes CK to look up sharply. CK (hoarse, whispering sharply) OM? OM, are you out there? He listens for a moment, apparently hears nothing (except maybe in his own mind), and then resumes cleaning up. CUT TO: The police officers return with a passenger in the back of the squad car. They get out and open the door for Richter who is talking non-stop. Richter You guys have got to go out to that school and talk to the team. Those guys cost us a bundle when they hot wire this thing. Someone has got to have keys by now, and we have to pay to put it back together. POLICEMAN 2 Yeah, we know. You didn't play ball in high school, did you? POLICEMAN 1 You were in Drama Club, right? RICHTER I don't know what that has to do with anything. The laws the law, right?! This is grand theft auto, right?! The three approach the back of the hearse and Richter produces key to open the door. RICHTER Lets see what theyve left us this time. Last time it was the visitors mascot and it crapped all over the carpet. Richter unlocks the back door and the door swings open to drench the three in the hearses contents. The ho lands on Richter in a provocative pose while the two police officers are knocked to the ground covered in what appears to be coagulated blood. Richter freaks out when the hos mouth falls open and cereal drips out onto his face. Policeman 1 runs to the bushes to throw up while Policeman 2 gets up quickly and runs to the squad car, calling the incident in. POLICEMAN 1 Dispatch, we need back-up out here at lovers lane. Weve got another one and this ones a doozy. ANGLE ON MENS ROOM NIGHT CK watches from the window with a smile. We see CK emerge from the dressing room in his Saturday Night Fever white (and red with blood) disco suit, but now he is just CK and no longer Anthony the Tiger. The white suit hangs off him limply now that he no longer has the bulky tiger suit on underneath it. CK takes his duffle bag and walks out of the bathroom. He uses the bathroom to conceal himself from the three while he makes good his escape down the hill to an adjacent road below. 000200000F1E000153C5F18,EXT. EMPTY COUNTRY ROADS NIGHT CK takes his duffle bag and walks out to the edge of the road. He sticks his thumb out and begins to hitch. He walks and walks without a car in sight, seeing only the ghostly bluish images of Chef Kenji and the prostitute riding by in a convertible, laughing, the ghostly bluish image of the young Anthony the Tiger victim and the female Bunny man victim and the old Bingo lady all in the back seat. They wave as they pass, and CK does not try to get a ride but stands by the side of the road as they pass, watching them go by, and then he keeps walking. Soon it will be daybreak and we see that CK has walked all the way back to CS-Eyepatch camp on his own. CUT TO: INT. TRAILER sun up CK awakes from a stupor on the floor and props himself up on his elbows. He grabs a skillet and takes a look at his bloody, messy self. He throws the skillet and reaches for a bottle of Crown Royal on the counter, tipping it up for a few large swallows. Then, with bottle in hand, he staggers down the hall dressed in his boxers and a tee shirt. He goes and turns on the shower in the bathroom and steps into the shower with his bottle, in his boxers and tee shirt. The blood runs down his legs mixed with the water following the pipe out to the leach line going into the ground. As he reaches for the bottle of bleach in one hand, setting down the bottle of scotch on the bathroom counter, he has a very hard time breathing as he covers his body with the bleach. We catch a side glance of him in the mirror and see OM looking out. Cuts of him filling plastic trash bags, cleaning the sink and floor of blood with bleach, and drinking. CK, all cleaned up, falls back on his hammock as the sun rises and he falls asleep. CUT TO: SAME MORNING, SAME PLACE Desiree has started a fire in a large burning barrel outside CKs trailer and picks up his breakfast, walking to the door. She knocks on the door and unlock it. CK is wearing a clean robe and lying in his hammock when he registers the fact that someone has arrived and is knocking on the trailer window. PAN TO WINDOW We see Desiree standing outside. CK gets up, walks to the door, and Desiree pushes it open. Desiree hands CK's meal tray in to him. DESIREE Hey, CK. You feeling any better? CK (nervously, hung-over) I guess. Fidgeting with the robe tie. CK (V.O.) Damn, what a close call! Had I even known it was almost time for breakfast? DESIREE Got any trash? CK Oh, yes, thank you. CK TURNS QUICKLY CK get two bags of trash and hands them to Desiree. He watches as she walks over to the barrel and throws the bags in. The flames grow high and through the flame we see the ghostly bluish images of the victims of Bunny Man, Captain Munch, Tiger, Lucky, and Count Strawbula. CK GLANCES AWAY CK looks at his breakfast which consists of eggs, grits, hashed browns, toast, and coffee. EXT. Trailer MORNING Desiree closes the door and locks it back, then backs off a few paces and starts to turn. CK (through the window, aloud) You in a hurry? Can you stay and talk for a while? CKS POV Looking at Desiree. DESIREE Our show's supposed to get a mention on the morning news. I want to go catch it. INT. TRAILER MORNING CK and his tiny TV are in the frame as he looks out at her. CK You could watch it here. DESIREE (sarcastic) Right. With your big 5 inch? We know how much you like me in your trailer. EXT. FULL SHOT OF LOT WITH TRAILER CKs POV as he looks out the window at Desiree with OM standing behind her and reaching for Desiree. A touch on Desirees shoulder causes Desiree to turn quickly around to see a woman named Bridget who has rushed up behind Desiree. Her friend Gail is farther away, but approaching. Bridget Oh, my God! (turns, calls to Gail) Gail, it's her! (back to Desiree) You're Desiree Davis, right? DESIREE (suspiciously) Yeah. bridget Can you get me in to see Sam? 0002000009E8000162DD9E2,DESIREE Well, I... Bridget Please! Or... CLOSE ON DESIREE AND BRIDGET As Bridget pulls out a pair of scissors. DESIREE Now, wait a minute. DESIREE backs up, away from her, but Bridget is now offering Desiree the scissors. bridget Oh, no! No! I just want a lock of Sams hair! Could you cut me a lock of it, you know, maybe while he's sleeping? EXT. WIDER AREA Gail joins her friend Bridget. Now we are looking at the three women. gail Oh, my God, Bridget! We found Desiree Davis! (a beat) Desiree, do you guys have any clue who the Boxville serial killer is? DESIREE (firmly) I have no idea what you're talking about. Desiree turns on her heel and starts to walk away. DESIREE (cont'd) And DON'T follow me! Bridget and Gail notice CK in the trailer. CLOSE ON BRIDGET AND GAIL As they go to CKs trailer window, where CK is staring out at them. GAIL Hey, are you somebody important? CUT TO: INT. STARS TRAILER - DAY The cast and crew, including director John, are crowded around the TV set. The shots are around the room with each of the cast and crew awaiting the mention of their show. Close up on TV as the news is being aired during the news the transitions continue till the TV set goes out of the shots and the screen is all you see with dither. As the transition to the CS-Eyepatch blurb starts the dither goes away. Just before the transition to CKs trailer the dither returns and the 5 set is reveled and we are in CKs trailer watching the show. NEWSMAN frank (on TV) Tuesday's seemingly random fatal attack on a housewife here in Oxville by a man dressed in a bunny costume... and Wednesday's report of a chef at the Poxville Sushi Breakfast Bar and Grill losing both his hand and his life to a man apparently dressed like Captain Munch have led local law enforcement and crime scene investigators to surmise that the crimes are linked and may have been committed by the same individual. It has now been determined that a hair found at the Oxville crime scene matches one found on the floor of the Poxville Sushi Breakfast Bar and Grill. Here with a special report is crime scene investigator Lou Slope. Lou? TV SET Lou appears beside Frank. He holds up two baggies side by side. LOU (on TV) As Frank just mentioned, someone committing seemingly random acts of violence is loose in our community, and at this point, the evidence that ties the crimes together, leading us to surmise that we have a serial killer on our hands, are these two hairs... Close up on baggies The baggies in Lous hands fill the TV screen. 0002000006A900016CBF6A3,LOU (off-screen) The baggie in my left hand contains a hair from the hare, and the baggie in my right hand contains a hair from the hare who is apparently now a sea captain who trailed fibers from his last crime into this one. A preliminary sketch of the rabbit-slash-sea captain has been issued. CLOSE UP ON ARTIST RENDERING OF ALLEGED SUSPECT It is a hilarious drawing of a bunny rabbit dressed in a Captain Munch outfit. WHILE THE SKETCH STAYS ON THE SCREEN LOU (off-screen) The woman who was hospitalized in the rabbit attack died at Oxville General on Tuesday afternoon, and the man whose hand was cut off died Wednesday en route to Poxville Memorial. All residents of Oxville, Poxville, and neighboring communities here in Boxville County are asked to be on the lookout for anyone who may seem out of place in these parts. BACK TO THE NEWS SET Where Lou appears beside Frank who is at the news desk. LOU (ON-SCREEN) The serial killer may reappear as a rabbit or a sea captain or something else entirely, but one fact stands out, this individual has a fetish for fancy costumes. Anyone who sees such an individual is asked to call their local law enforcement or the newsroom here at K-OX-5. focus ON NEWSMAN FRANK who makes it clear that Lou is done and that its time for a transition. FRANK Which leads us to our entertainment segment this morning on a new prime time show that has made Boxville County its home over the past few weeks, CS-Eyepatch! ZOOM IN ON THE TV SCREEN So there is nothing of the room showing, so that we are watching the show being aired like all the people in the CS-Eyepatch Stars trailer. The logo for CS-Eyepatch fills the screen with appropriate bluegrass music. 000200000A9B00017362A95,ANNOUNCER The Problem... In every city, there's a crime around each corner. (a beat) The Solution? CS-Eyepatch! ON TV SCREEN - video OF DESIREE WITH HER SLEEVE ROLLED UP She looks like one of those muscular women posters from the Rosie the Riveter war era where Rosie has a scarf on her head, her sleeve rolled up, and shes making a muscle to show strength in the workplace during the war. ANNOUNCER (CONTD) Caroline Sarah-Bellum Eyepatch. Criminals fear her. Her partner Sam Gruesome adores her. No forensic evidence escapes her scrutiny as she and her crew travel from city to city via a caravan of motor homes and trailers to solve the most intriguing cases of our time! And it's always done in an hour... including commercials! MUSIC IN with quick montage from past episodes, which ends with a smooth blended fade into... INT. SPECIAL EFFECTS TRAILER - DAY The CS-Eyepatch special effects man is in his trailer with appropriate special effects items around him on tables. The time 8:29 A.M. and the name CARL "CORNBREAD" WALTERS, SPECIAL EFFECTS ~ MAKEUP. CARL "CORNBREAD" WALTERS is on the screen in lower corner, as Cornbread (Carl Walters) begins speaking. His name fades after they have been on the screen a short while. CORNBREAD Welcome to the makeup-effects trailer here at CS-Eyepatch. My name is Carl Walters, but you can call me Cornbread, since that was the first solid food I ever ate at my pappy's knee. (a beat) This here trailer is where our cadavers are born, which might be not quite right if you think about it, because our cadavers are actually dead. On the slab right here with me today is Tom "Turnip Greens" Gregory, but you can call him Turnip, even though we don't know why. ANGLE ON TURNIP Who lies on aluminum foil, which covers the bed in the trailer. Turnip wears a stupid grin. TURNIP Hi, y'all. CORNBREAD Shut up, Turnip. You're supposed to be dead. (a beat) Now, the great thing about using aluminum foil for your autopsy is, number one, aluminum foil is shiny like a real autopsy table, and number 2, aluminum foil can catch all the drippings from the gooky body parts just like it does on the barbecue grill when youre cookin your favorite chicken recipe. (a beat) Now, Turnip here... TURNIP Cornbread, let me tell it! Let me tell it! CORNBREAD Now shush, already! Turnip is in the episode where a wheat thresher gets him good. Now in this particular homicide, our main character Turnip here has more than just a few ripped tendons. His former business pal Hank Carter has actually immobilized Turnip with a rock and then proceeds to put anything that sticks out on Turnip - head, feet, ears, and face included, into the thresher, turning him into one dead vegetable. 0002000008EC00017DF78E6,CLOSE ON CORNBREAD HUNKERING OVER TURNIP ON the FOIL He has a bit of pitted gunk in his hands to put on Turnips face. CORNBREAD (CONTD) Now, this is the final piece that will go on Turnip's face. We'll be attaching this and blending all the edges. We have also a bloody ear cap that, when applied, will make Turnip look as wild and wacky as a Van Gogh self-portrait. The challenge on makeup like this is to make your corpse look like Turnip. Too much gunk, and heck, this dead guy could be just any dead guy. CLOSE UP ON FACE MAKEUP JAR IN HAND Cornbread holds a jar up to the camera (a bit too close, so its out of focus) and then brings it back to himself. CORNBREAD (CONTD) This is our autopsy room color. ANGLE ON CORNBREAD He blends dead makeup on Turnip around the newly-applied face gunk. ON SCREEN - LOWER CORNER The time reads 9:44 A.M. CORNBREAD (CONTD) Now, Turnip's been dead long enough that he should really start losing the color in his body and start turning gray. Cornbread pulls out a can of gray spray paint and starts shaking it. ON SCREEN - LOWER CORNER The time reads 11:46 A.M. CORNBREAD (CONTD) Well, we're getting to the final stages here. We're just gonna touch up the makeup colors and pull it to life here and there, and it won't be long before he's all set. Cornbread starts spraying the paint. ON SCREEN - LOWER CORNER The time reads 12:31 P.M. CUT TO: EXT. SPECIAL EFFECTS TRAILER - DAY Cornbread and Turnip in the scene and Turnip looks bad. Director John is walking by and he looks at Turnip. John recoils, disgusted. JOHN I think I'm gonna blow chunks. CORNBREAD (laughing heartily) That's the effect we want! TURNIP Hee hee hee! John thinks I'm gross! CORNBREAD Shut up, Turnip! CUT TO: MUSIC IN with quick montage from past episodes, which ends with a smooth blended fade into... INT. MUSIC TRAILER - DAY A "saw band" consisting of guys with xylophone, accordion, triangle, bottles, and other primitive instruments are playing some freaky music while Music Director Mason "Rat Trap" Stanley is sitting at a music editing console with some basic slides and buttons and a screen. This is Mason "Rat Trap" Stanley's interview. The time 1:12 P.M. and the name MASON "RAT TRAP" STANLEY, MUSIC MASTER are on the screen in both lower corners. 0002000005C0000186DD5BA,RAT TRAP Hello. My name is Mason "Rat Trap" Stanley, but you can call me Rat Trap. The most important function of the music in CS-Eyepatch is to add a sense of mystery and suspense, like this... SMASH FLASH AND SFX White dramatic flash with sharp single note/chord music sting BUMM! RAT TRAP (chuckles because he liked that) Scared you, didnt I? SMASH FLASH AND SFX White dramatic flash with sharp single note/chord music sting BUMM! RAT TRAP (chuckles because he liked that) Hee hee hee! Did it again! (a beat) Anyway, my point is that I try to instill each dramatic moment with music that causes uneasiness, discomfort, and apprehension. BAND MEMBER (O.S.) Yeah! Like when you're on the pot with the runs and you find out there's no toilet paper! The band members off-screen howl with laughter. RAT TRAP The first step in creatin music for CS-Eyepatch is the spotting session where everybody gets together, like the sound effects guy, the producer, and the director, and we discuss where music should begin and end and how it should impact the picture. Then I get a tape with music on it, and I bring it here to my trailer, and I take a look at it and try to get a sense of where themes are going to be developed, and I start writing music for that episode. Band member Is that when you say, play somethin? ON SCREEN The time reads 1:41 P.M. RAT TRAP (CONTD) The best way to show you how music enhances CS-Eyepatch is to show you some show with no music... 00020000068700018C97681,CUT TO: EXt. dusty roads - day RECAP OF EARLIER FOOTAGE WITHOUT SOUND... Absolute silence as the gunman leave the same way they arrived, courtesy of a pickup truck filled with hay and squealing pigs in the back bed. Well on their way, off down a dusty country road, police arrive at the Mailbox Shack from a different direction. CUT TO: INT. MUSIC TRAILER - DAY RAT TRAP (CONTD) And then with music. CUT TO: EXt. dusty roads - day RECAP OF EARLIER FOOTAGE WITH SOUND... Hokey fiddle music plays as the gunman leave the same way they arrived, courtesy of a pickup truck filled with hay and squealing pigs in the back bed. Well on their way, off down a dusty country road, police arrive at the Mailbox Shack from a different direction. CUT tO: INT. MUSIC TRAILER - DAY RAT TRAP (CONTD) (seriously) That little demonstration, I think, says it better than I ever could. FROM OFF-SCREEN, A XYLOPHONE STICK Comes flying on-screen, aimed at Rat Traps head. RAT TRAP (angry) Hey! CUT TO: MUSIC IN with quick montage from past episodes, which ends with a smooth blended fade into... INT. CGI DIRECTOR'S TRAILER - DAY This is Wayne "Chipmunk" Charleston's interview. The time 2:20 P.M. and the name WAYNE "CHIPMUNK" CHARLESTON, CGI GENIUS are on the screen in both lower corners before they fade. CHIPMUNK Hello. My name is Wayne "Chipmunk" Charleston, but most folks just call me Chip. That's cause I'm a junior, you know, like a chip off the old block, even though my Dad never knew what a computer generated image was so I could hardly be a chip off his block. Ifen you follow where Im going there, but that's no matter. Stop me if I get off-track, Ifen ya can. 0002000005B7000193185B1,(a beat) The CGIs are those parts of each episode where you get to see somethin cool like poison running through some body's veins, the ghost of an arrow piercing some bodys lung, the picture of a bullet goin through a wall, and all that other fun stuff. POINTS TO HIS CLASSIC INVISIBLE MAN AND INVISIBLE WOMAN On his desk. CHIPMUNK (CONTD) I wan fer ya to meet my two little friends, Invisible Man and Invisible Woman. They come in real handy like, fer a lot of the work I do. You see, their organs actually come out. He picks up Invisible Man and opens him up and picks out a few organs. CHIPMUNK (CONTD) Like, here's Mr. Invisibles spleen, I think, and maybe a kidney, and hey... Chip pulls out a small rock. CHIPMUNK (contd) Looks like Mr. Invisible heres got a kidney stone. (a beat) Heh heh! Im just joshin. Chip throws the rock away, not in the trash but across the room, off-screen, where we hear it hit something. CHIPMUNK (cONTD) Anyway, here are some of my favorite CGIs I made right here on this here computer for this season's epesodes of CS-Eyepatch. CUT TO: INSERT Richards Avid CGIs and appropriate narrative by Chip. CUT TO: MUSIC IN with quick montage from past episodes, which ends with a smooth blended fade into... INT. associate producer'S TRAILER - DAY This is Harry Buzz Blivit's interview. The time 3:14 P.M. and the name HARRY "BUZZ" BLIVIT, ASS. PRODUCER are on the screen in both lower corners before they fade. 000200000699000198C9693,harry Hello. My name is Harry Buzz Blivit, but most people call me Harry Buzz. Im in charge of the money shots. Thats where special set-ups are rigged so we can show all the great ways a guy can die. (a beat) This kinda rig here... We follow him over to what looks like a vacuum cleaner hose all coiled up in a mass. HARRY (CONTD) ...is being used to simulate mule intestines. In one of our episodes, a mule swallows a balloon full of heroin. Now dont go thinking that by mule I mean a person. Im talking about a real mule got in the house and et it. INSERT - PICTURE OF MULE With appropriate donkey sound effect. CUT TO: INT. associate producer'S TRAILER - DAY HARRY is showing us the view from the top of the tube looking downward and talks as he manipulates the hose. HARRY (CONTD) Heres where were going to simulate a balloon... He takes a red balloon tied into a funny animal shape from the table and begins to insert it down the tube, squeezing the tube as he talks. HARRY (CONTD) As its traveling down the intestine while the mule is simultaneous being crushed in a landslide. (a beat) So what were doing is offering you an internal shot as you follow the balloon down the intestine to the point where the intestine gets crushed and the balloon explodes. CLOSE UP ON HARRY Who is dead serious. HARRY (cONTD) Its a little hard to recreate right now, but believe me, its a great effect. Actually, we take every opportunity we get to show something traveling down or through a tube or up a hole because as all you fans of Star Track know, its always fun to travel where no one has gone before. (a beat) Damn. Thats pretty profound when you think about it. 0002000005B300019F5C5AD,CUT TO: MUSIC IN with quick montage from past episodes, which ends with a smooth blended fade into... Ext. location manager'S vehicle - DAY This is Ben Flapjack Summers interview. The time 4:01 P.M. and the name BEN FLAPJACK SUMMERS, LOCATION MANAGER are on the screen in both lower corners as Flapjack (Ben Summers) begins speaking. His name and the time of day then fade. FLAPJACK Hello. My name is Ben Flapjack Summers, but you can call me Flapjack. I dont have a trailer... just this here car. Standing next to an old rusted out Plymouth Valiant (or similar hunk of junk), he is wearing a plaid suit, wide tie, and has a briefcase in hand. FLAPJACK Cause, as location manager for CS-Eyepatch, Im the mover and the shaker who always has to figure out where were going to film an episode next. (a beat) Except right now, I dont think were going anywhere while theres a real killer on the loose in Boxville County. Everyone thinks the killer is on the rampage because were in town and, well, I dont need to tell you that where theres real killin goin on, theres a LOT of news. Everybodys talking about us now, which is kinda funny because our shows are about killing. Were, like, famous because this guy is killing people. (a beat) Which is good for us, but bad for the people hes killing. (appealing to killer) Maybe if you could just hurt a few people badly, no one would have to die and we could sill get some attention, right? 0002000005DE0001A5095D8,MOVE TO A view of flapjacks boots as he kicks dirt, mad at himself. FLAPJACK (CONTD) Heck, just forget I said anything at all. Cut! CUT TO: MUSIC IN with quick montage from past episodes, which ends with a smooth blended fade into... Int. FORENSICS LAB TRAILER - DAY This is Dr. Zebediah Zacharys interview. The time 4:16 P.M. and the name DR. ZEBEDIAH ZACHARY, FORENSIC MANIAC are on the screen in the lower corner before fading. DOC Hello. My name is Dr. Zebediah Zachary, but you can call me Doc. Im here today to show you some of my favorite toys in our lab. We follow him around the room. First we see... CLOSE UP KIDS JUNKY MICROSCOPE DOC (CONTD) The first thing Id like to show you is our high-tech microscope which we use to analyze hairs, fibers, man fluids, boogers, and the occasional bug leg. LOOKING THROUGH THE LENS We see the leg of a sexy woman (maybe wearing fishnet stockings like you might find on racy playing cards). DOC (CONTD) See, ya gotta put yer eye on this thing here and... Oops. You werent supposed to see that. CLOSE UP ON DOC As he is ready to lecture the audience, he lifts a book on the table near him to his chest that is called Forensics for Dimwits 101 which should look like a yellow and black whatever for Dummies book. DOC (CONTD) See, details! Its ALL in the details. The main thing is knowin that everything in nature is unique. There are no two people that are exactly alike -- even identical twins you meet through an escort service! 0002000008480001AAE1842,(a beat) Anyway, the question in Forensics for Dimwits 101 is, can we match items beyond a shadow of doubt? In any impression, is there enough detail to show that an object and only that object made an impression? (a beat) Let me show ya here. I can use my butt. The camera follows him as he walks over to a copier, but we pan around so that we are watching from behind a stack of books or something like that so we can see he is dropping his pants and hopping up to sit on the copier, but his private parts are blocked in an Austin Powers way. The copier scans his butt. He jumps off, jumps back up, hits the copier button and re-scans his butt. He pulls his pants up and walks back over to the table with both Xerox copies, which he lays on the table. CLOSE UP On both butt copies. While he is talking in mid-sentence, make a transition from him on screen to back out but now we are in... SAM See this pimple right here? CUT TO: INT. CKS trailer - daY Coming out of a dither to CK with an over-the-shoulder shot. He is watching the same show the CS-Eyepatch cast and crew members are watching in the stars trailer. DOC (CONTD) OK, look closely at the butt shot on the left and compare it to the one on the right. Even though theres a slight shift from when I repositioned myself on the Xerox glass, you can still see that its my butt and only my butt by... He pulls out a red marking pen and circles the same zit on both butt prints. DOC (CONTD) Identifying the same zit, which is in precisely the same place in both pictures. Youve got to see that theyre the same. (reminiscent of the George Michaels jokes) I mean, look at my butt! Look at my butt! Look at my butt! The camera pans around and focuses on Docs butt. CK leans over and snaps off the TV set. He returns to his sewing table where he is working on a black and yellow striped costume. CK (V.O.) The last thing I needed to see more of was Doc making a complete ass out of himself. I had work to do. My costume for that night was almost ready. If I pulled off the performance just right, it would have all the makings of a great Bee movie. 0002000007B00001B3237AA,CUT TO: EXT. CAMPFIRE IN WOODS Adjacent to CKs trailer, same positioning as when he snuck out as Anthony the Tiger. CK (v.O.) The cast and crew had a party that night that was bound to last quite a while, with everyone staggering back to bed around dawn. The coverage of CS Eyepatch on the news and the fact that both Barbara Walters and Time Magazine were on their way to Boxville to interview us on the shows overnight success had them all delirious with joy. CUT TO: Int. CKs trailer He is struggling into his Bee costume. CK (v.o.) I had always wanted to try Honey Crunch O-e-Os, no doubt about it, but every time I had reached for some in the store, Mom had always slapped my hand away. (a beat) I would find release from the sting of that rejection by using an actual hypodermic stinger from the props trailer which I was inspired to fill with cleaning fluid based on a news story Id heard where a hospitalized woman who was supposed to be injected with a contrast dye to assist in a radiology procedure was accidentally given a fatal dose of cleansing fluid typically used to prepare the exterior of the body for surgery. (a beat) Getting the costume on would be a challenge, but I knew I would look just great. CK works hard to fasten the back of the costume, and as he looks in the mirror to see over his shoulder he sees OM. Another glance, and hes back. He bends over to pack his duffle bag. CUT TO: OUTDOOR CAMPFIRE The cast and crew of Trailer Trash CS-Eyepatch sit around the campfire, but instead of eating weenies and marshmallows they are now roasting more high-end food like Cornish hens and sipping expensive celebratory champagne. Doc is holding court and the rest are drunk enough to listen. DOC But the high-point for me was when I was able to demonstrate the use of the liquid measurement. Chipmunk Yeah, I loved it when you told them, Ya can keep yer micro pipetties and give me a good old turkey baster any day! They all laugh. 00020000054C0001BACD546,FULL VIEW OF CAMPFIRE circle with the trees beyond the campfire somewhat out of focus, blurred. The champagne continues to flow as the hens on the spit continue to cook and smoke. CUT TO: InT. TRAILER - NIGHTFALL CK slings his fat duffle bag over his shoulder, and he takes... ONE LAST LOOK In the mirror and sees OM. CUT TO: EXT. TRAILER The night, with the campfire in the distance, barely visible through the trees. FROM THE REVERSE ANGLE We see CKs bumblebee face as it appears through a clearing in the dense trees and foliage, with the lights from the trailer windows shining behind him in the distance. Long shot on the trailer and the curtains move in the window and it appears someone is inside. EXT. THE outdoors near trailer CK starts to make his getaway on tiptoes, careful not to make a sound. CUT TO: Ext. The CAMPFIRE Where the cast and crew are still having a great time. JOHN Yeah, and what about the comparison microscope segment, Doc? DESIREE You mean where he compares two Flintstone vitamins and decides theyre both Barneys? Big laugh all around. DESIREE (cONTD) Sam, what are you doing? SAM (feeling his head) Ya think anybody noticed Im missing some hair? Laughs as their voices fade and the camp fire blurs as we now focus on the trees in the distance. CK the Bee is sneaking through the woods with his huge duffle bag. 0002000006620001C01365C,CK the BEE'S POV as he walks, we are somewhere behind him or over him, or simply with him as he skirts through bushes and trees. CK/BEE (V.O.) I had to be quiet and quick, as always when I was heading out for the hunt. (a beat) Since this crime would be hampered by the novel use of a hypodermic needle, I decided to stick to only one adventure tonight, but I had planned where Id go to a T. I had passed by Poxville High School on my walk back home from my 3-crime spree the other night, and I knew the school was scheduled for an at-home basketball game which, according to my watch, was already well underway. CUT TO: EXT. back alley entrance to high school gym - NIGHTFALL CK/Bee approaches the back doors to the gym and presses his ear up against it. SFX Cheering, and the noise of a large crowd resounds from the gym. CK dares to peek in the window inset on both sides of the double doors. IN THE WINDOWS REFLECTION We see OM. Another glance, and we see the basketball court, the players, the fans in the bleachers, and the cheerleaders. ANGLE ON CK as he ducks behind some trash cans and stacked benches or bleachers or pallets and folded tables to the right of the door and crouches down. CK/BEE (V.O.) If high school students in Poxville were anything like they were in L.A., one of them would need to pay tribute to the nicotine gods and take a smoke break soon. EXT. BACK ALLEY ENTRANCE DOOR As it bangs open and a girl comes out. She pauses to pull out a pack of smokes, takes out a match and drops it. ANGLE ON GROUND As we watch the match burn on the pavement and go back up to the girl as we watch her smoke. 0002000007750001C66F76F,CK/BEE (v.O.) It always comes down to psychology. What do high school girls find irresistible besides boy rock bands, chocolate, and clothes? Why baby kittens, of course, and while I didnt have one on me to squeeze and make cry, I had the next best thing, a kitten on tape. ANGLE ON CK As he pulls out his micro-cassette recorder, in the clear plastic part of the recorders lid, we see OMs reflection. He depresses the play button and the recorder emits a serious of mews. ANGLE ON SMOKING GIRL Deep in thought, in a cloud of smoke, she registers the sound and comes around the pile of junk at the double-doors. FULL SHOT ON CK/BEE and GIRL As he covers her mouth and takes her down, the recorder clattering to the pavement as he does so. He kneels on her chest and covers her mouth as he struggles to pull his hypodermic out of his duffle bag. ANGLE ON HYPODERMIC NEEDLE And in the clear cylinder of fluid, we once again see CK/BEE. ANGLE OVER CK/BEES SHOULDER As he studies his victim who is paralyzed with fear. CK/BEE (v.O.) There was no need to talk. It was time for the thrill of a quick kill. And then I saw it. CLOSE UP ON GIRLS FACE AND SHOULDERS As she stares up at CK/BEE. CK/BEE (v.o.) The necklace. She was wearing one of those candy necklaces I craved as a child but was never allowed to have. The hypodermic in my hand was temporarily forgotten as I stared at those sweet beads of sugar. (a beat) In that moment, I made a decision I knew I might live to regret. I bent down and bit one of the candys off the elastic and savored it. (a beat) After that, I lost all reason. She put two and two together and we struck a silent bargain, her life for the candy necklace. It was as simple as that. Gently, I took the necklace from around her neck. I stretched the elastic, taking care not to lose a single candy bead. I put my fingers up to my lips and she nodded once, in understanding. 000200000E6E0001CDDEE68,(a beat) Then I lifted my knee off her chest and put a index finger on her mouth. EXT. ALLEY OUTSIDE GYM The girl gets up and runs back to the gym doors and goes inside. ANGLE ON CK/BEE As he weighs the situation now. CK/BEE (V.O.) I didnt have much time. I carefully cradled the necklace in one hand and grabbed my duffle in the other and ran. A SHORT DISTANCE FROM SCHOOL CK/Bee looks back and sees nothing. No one has been alerted. No one is coming after him. He turns back around in the direction of the trailer camp and begins to run again. CUT TO: EXT. CamPFIRE IN WOODS The Cornish hens are being gobbled and tall tales are still being told by cast and crew members alike. The fire is a large bonfire now and the area is well lit from the fire. Bottles of booze and champagne are strewn around. RAT TRAP Hey, Chip, tell us the one about the firearms tank we destroyed. Chipmunk Who knew we needed something more solid than a wooden washtub? They all laugh. Associate Producer Harry Blivit gets up. harry Speaking of wood, we need a few more logs if were going to keep this party going. Harry heads away. CORNBREAD (calling to him) There should be some more behind CKs trailer. Harry waves or makes an OK gesture and starts walking to CKs trailer. CUT TO: EXT. BACK OF CKs trailer CK/Bee is standing there, looking at his depleted wood pile. CK/BEE (v.O.) I couldnt believe my eyes. The stack of wood that helped me get back up on top of the trailer was vastly diminished to the point of being useless. How in the hell was I going to get home? ANGLE ON SIDE OF TRAILER CK/Bee is crouched down, next to his duffle bag, appraising his situation, looking up at the trailer, assessing the problem at hand. FLASHBACK - CK REMEMBERS ... ANGLE ON ROOF OF TRAILER CK the Bunny Man gets up on a chair and, with a broom handle, he pokes the top trailer vent open. Then he jumps up and hoists himself through the opening. He lets the broom fall back down to the trailer floor. TOP OF TRAILER CK/Captain Munch seals the vent back into place with sticky oatmeal kept in a jar he takes from his duffle bag. Then he quietly jumps down from the trailer roof onto a pile of logs propped against the backside of the trailer. EXT. BACK OF TRAILER CK the Tiger quietly steps up on the logs which are in a pile that form makeshift steps against the backside of the trailer. He grabs the edge of the roof and flings his fat duffle bag on top, pulling himself up till he gets a knee-hold and can bring himself topside. TOP OF TRAILER CK as Count Strawbula uses a putty knife from his duffle bag and lifts the oatmeal seal on the vent, scraping the dried oatmeal back into the jar he takes from his duffle bag. He uses wet oatmeal to create a new seal around the perimeter of the vent screen. Then he quietly lowers himself into his trailer, and his feet find the chair beneath the vent. He repositions the vent screen that has fresh oatmeal paste on it, into place so that it once again looks sealed. CUT TO: EXT. BACK OF TRAILER MORNING Harry comes around the backside of the trailer. HARRY CK? FOCUS SHIFTS TO CK/BEE CK/Bee freezes for a moment. He quietly slides the zipper on his duffle bag open and roots around for something. ANGLE INSIDE DUFFLE CK/Bee finds something that will work if he is about to be confronted, his sharpest pair of silver sewing scissors. The glint off them reflecting CK/Bee. CK (V.O.) The moment of truth, and no turning back. Well, I was ready. Bring it on. CK/Bee stands up and turns to face Harry. CK/BEE (aloud) Hey, Harry. POV HARRY Whose face registers a series of emotions as we see him put two and two together, rifling through the following memories: 0002000009A20001DC4699C,LOU (off-screen) A preliminary sketch of the rabbit-slash-sea captain has been issued. CLOSE UP ON ARTIST RENDERING OF ALLEGED SUSPECT It is a hilarious drawing of the bunny rabbit dressed in a Captain Munch outfit. CUT TO: NEWS SET Where Lou appears beside Frank who is at the news desk. LOU (ON-SCREEN) The serial killer may reappear as a rabbit or a sea captain or something else entirely, but one fact stands out, this individual has a fetish for fancy costumes. CUT TO: EXT. BEHIND CKS TRAILER The men are face to face, with CK ready to attack if necessary. Harry takes a step forward but CK stands his ground. HARRY Its you! CK/BEE Harry, I can explain... FOCUS ON CK As he sees a huge grin spreading over Harrys face and realizes that Harry is happy, CKs tension dissipates and he stands, still on the alert, to drop/sink the shiny scissors back into the duffle bag/into Harry. HARRY (cutting him off) Explain? Are you kidding? Still wearing a big smile, Harry spins around fast and rushes to CK/Bee, who drops the scissors back into his duffle bag. Harry grabs CK by the arm and drags him deep into... EXT. THe thick of the woods - nightFALL They are surrounded by trees and far away from the campsite, out of earshot. Harry slaps CK/Bee on the back with a jubilant expression on his face. CK stops to crouch and root around for the candy necklace, which he finds and inspects briefly, then begins to nibble, rising again to his feet to continue walking. HARRY (excited) Do you know what youve done for us, man? CK/Bee is feeling waves of gratitude and amazement coming from Harry. He starts to nibble the candy necklace he took from the school girl. HARRY (CONTD) This is the greatest thing that could happen to us! You cant pay for this kind of publicity! If you werent out there killing people around here, we wouldnt be in the news at all! Hell, we might even be off the air already! CK/Bee is quiet, thoughtful, taking it all in. CK/BEE Im glad youre happy, Harry, but I think I blew it tonight. He stops again to bend down and look in his duffle bag and confirms his suspicions. CK/BEE (CONTD) I left a hypodermic needle at the high school tonight... (a beat) And a micro-cassette recorder, too. HARRY Well, what the heck was on the recording? I mean, it wasnt a full confession, right? CK/BEE No, actually it was a... HARRY I dont even want to know. CK, youve got to keep up the good work, but its time to work smart, not hard. 00020000064C0001E5E2646,Harry indicates that they should sit down on the ground, so they find some stumps or a log and sit. HARRY (CONTD) First thing, lose the costumes, OK? I mean, its clear that you like them, right? But theyre a little too obvious. Everyones looking for someone who sticks out and right now, if you dont mind me saying so, you stand out about as much as the Rev. Falwell at a Democratic picnic. CK/BEE (uneasy) But I need a cereal costume, a different one each time, and they all have to be special. HARRY (trying to follow him) Cereal as in cornflakes or serial as in serial killer? CK/BEE (firmly) Cornflakes. HARRY Well, arent there any cereal characters who are less obvious than a...bee, for instance? CK thinks. A smile starts to spread across his face. CK/BEE Yeah! HARRY Yeah? CK/BEE Yeah! Harry covers his ears with his hands in protest. HARRY Dont tell me! I dont want to know. I dont want to be considered an accessory, OK? Harry pulls a set of keys out of his pocket and jingles them. HARRY (cONTD) Now, lets get you back home. CUT TO: INT. POLICE STATION interrogation room - DAY Scott and Trevor, who investigated the Stop, Bunny Man, Stop! crime, are with the high school girl. The micro-cassette recorder is on the table and Scott is rewinding the tape and playing the mewing kitty cries over and over. TREVOR Scott, youre not going to find anything else on that tape. Its a cat, period. Thats all she heard. Thats all thats on there. Scott depresses the play button and listens again to the mewing kitty. SCOTT I know, but I just cant seem to stop myself. Kitty, kitty. 0002000005810001EC2857B,Trevor leans over and takes the micro-cassette recorder away from Scott. They are behaving like young boys. Lou from the Stop, Bunny Man, Stop! crime, the guy who got beaned on the head, comes in. His head is heavily bandaged. He is carrying a kids 3-section face flip book. TREVOR Hey, Lou, good to see you. Hows your head? CLOSE-UP OF LOU As he recalls in flashback mode... ANGLE ON LOU AT FIRST CRIME SCENE (BUNNY) LOU You know how the film got screwed up last time. I don't trust him. (louder) No, I don't! I don't trust him to do the job right! FULL ROOM SHOT The assailant, dressed in a full bunny outfit, steps out of the armoire, approaches Lou from the rear, and hits him on the head with a heavy object that somewhat resembles a glass paperweight. CLOSER ON LOU Lou goes down, falling across the victim on the floor. CUT TO: INT. POLICE STATION interrogation room - DAY TREVOR Is your head any better? Lou walks over and slaps him upside the skull. LOU My head, you moron? How you think my head is? Not good, I'll tell you that. (a beat) By the way, did you two maroons ever think it might have been a good idea to baggie that micro-cassette recorder so it could be dusted for prints? ANGLE ON TREVOR AND SCOTT As they look at each other, like, no. FULL ROOM As Lou slaps the kids 3-section face flip book down in front of the high school girl, who is looking amazed by whats going on. 000200000B7B0001F1A3B75,LOU (gruffly to the girl) Hi. My name is Lou. The girl offers her hand. STACEY Stacey Jenkins. They shake hands. LOU Senior? STACEY (shaking her head) Junior. LOU You want to run through what happened last night for me? STACEY Well, I already told Trevor and Scott... LOU Forget about them. Lou takes a seat. LOU Tell it again. Tell it to me. Nice and slow. CUT TO: EXT. large bakery - DAY CK is watching trucks emerge from the bakery with carts of cakes, pies, and freshly-baked bread. CK/SNAPPY (V.O.) It was much easier getting in and out of my trailer now that I had Harrys help. Today I was Snappy, complete with jacket, neckerchief, and red-headed wig. (a beat) Everything was going my way. It didnt even take too long to pick my next kill. CAMERA TRACKS Outside a large bakery we hear the whistle blow and cars are leaving the parking lot as the shift changes and it is beginning to get dark. CK/Snappy makes his way through the dock doors into the bakery. He walks past the cooling line where cakes and desserts have come out of the ovens. CK follows and eventually finds himself in a large kitchen with huge mixing Hobart machines, vats, and cranes to move mixed batter for cakes and goodies to dispensing machines. CK/SNAPPY Wonderfully delicious? WOMAN You there! Are you the new guy? CK Why, yes, I am the new guy. You can call me Snappy. WOMAN Second shift is a piece of cake, Snappy. Clean-up is mostly done and we mix for the third shift to do the baking. CK Sugar? WOMAN I know youre not getting fresh. Yeah, tons of it! Come on, Ill show you the ropes. The two make their way to an area where bags and bags of mix is on shelves ready to go into vats and they hook up bags for the lift, pouring bags of mix into a large machine. Milk and eggs come from large nozzles with meters on them. There are cans of chocolate syrup, pie filling, and confectionery sugar in huge sacks. WOMAN All you do is follow the list. The ingredients are all there. Set this to the amount you need and it comes out just right. She turns on the large Hobart mixer and the ingredients begin to mix, making dough. WOMAN Remember to always grease the bowls before you start or the mix will stick. Do it just like I showed you and youll have no trouble. Got it? CK/SNAPPy Theres something missing. WOMAN No. ANGLE ON CK The woman looks confused, looking back at the list before he tackles and pushes her into the mixing bowl, which works her right into the mix. The large machine does not skip a beat as it break her bones one after another and she starts looking like a pretzel in the mix. A lot of smaller snaps are heard as she is mixed into the mix. CK/Snappy puts both hands on the edge of the mixer to get a closer look. Theres a loud SNAP! when you see her neck get turned with the arm of the mixer. SNAP! CK/Snappy is now dancing around the bowl, snapping his fingers. CUT TO: INT. POLICE STATION interrogation room - DAY 00020000090E0001FD18908,Scott and Trevor and Lou are seated with Stacey, who is flipping through the kids 3-section face flip book. ANGLE ON FLIP BOOK Making funny faces as Stacey talks. STACEY I think his nose was a little like this. (flips a page) No, maybe more like this. (flips a page) And his eyes... (flips a page) I just dont know... FULL ROOM The investigators are hanging on her every word. CUT TO: Ext. HOTEL DAY CK is now dressed as Crackles in a red jacket; blue and white skull cap; blonde wig; a bright white bow tie; blue pants; and red tennis shoes with white laces and white caps on the front. He is casing the courtyard of a hotel which has sliding glass doors facing the interior of the courtyard. He is holding his duffle bag. A woman in one of the rooms has begun drawing a bath with the drapes partially open. CK/Crackles sits down on one of the chairs in the courtyard and watches. We cut to the woman pouring bubble bath. We cut back to CK/Crackles walking toward the sliding glass door. We catch CK/Crackles reflection in the sliding glass door, the reflection of OM. ANGLE ON SLIDING GLASS DOOR As CK/Crackles slowly slides the door open and enters. ANGLE ON BATHROOM DOOR Which is partially opened. The woman is now in her bubble bath, listening to the radio. A glance around the room shows that the duffle bag is open on the floor. Through CK/Crackless eyes, we gauge the distance from the bathtub to the woman who is relaxing with a cloth over her eyes in the warm tub while music plays from the radio just above her. In a flash, CK/Crackles hands are seen holding two large Stun shocker guns used for self defense or by police. He is standing at the end of the bath tub. She senses something amiss and lifts the rag up just enough to see CK/Crackles from the waist down and the two large guns pointed her way. The triggers are pulled and the air fire of the guns launch darts into the woman in the tub. This brings the woman to life, as she kicks and screams in the tub. She drops it into the bubbles and it is left to our horrified imaginations what the screams, which go silent, and the electrical crackles, which continue, mean. CUT TO: INT. POLICE STATION interrogation room - DAY Scott and Trevor and Lou are seated with Stacey, who is still flipping through the kids 3-section face flip book. 0002000006ED000206206E7,ANGLE ON FLIP BOOK Making funny faces as Stacey talks. STACEY I think his mouth was a little like this. (flips a page) No, maybe more like this. (flips a page) No, maybe, She cuts herself off mid-sentence. STACEY I think I know what the problem is. FULL ROOM The investigators are all ears. STACEY (frankly) Do you have any books where theyre wearing things on their heads? I just cant visualize this guy without his antennas. Lou upset presses an intercom button on the table. LOU Joe, find a picture of John Belushi from his days on Saturday Night Live where hes dressed in his bee outfit and do it stat! CUT TO: EXT. MECHANICS WORKSHOP - DAY CK, now dressed as Plop in a orange jacket with blue epaulets; blue bellmans cap with yellow brim; green pants; and brunette wig stands outside a mechanics workshop, looking in at a guy working on a car. CK (V.O.) Everything was working like clockwork now that Harry was helping me. I not only didnt have to worry about getting in and out of my trailer now; he had helped me refine my wardrobe so that it barely took any time to change at all. CK enters the workshop/garage and the man stops working. MAN Can I help you? CK/SHOCK Yeah, I was supposed to get an estimate on what it will cost to fix the 87 Honda. The man squints, looking out at the cars parked in the garage lot. Then he looks back at CK/Plop, studying him. MAN Say, you work at a hotel? CK/Plop Why do you ask? MAN Its the hat, man. I can spot a door man anywhere. (chuckles) OK. The paperwork should be over here. The man walks over to a work table which is covered with tools and also has a vice on one end. CK/Plop follows him. There are papers on clipboards, but the man doesnt find what he wants, so he bends down to look on a lower shelf. 00020000095E00020D07958,CK/Plop conks the man over the head with a big wrench that was on the table, then gets a floor creeper under a car on a rack where the mechanic was doing a brake job. He lays the creeper next to the mechanic and rolls him over onto the creeper and uses zip ties to attach his arms and legs to the creeper. He stuffs a red shop rag in his mouth. Plop rolls the mechanic and the creeper as one under the hoist with the car with no wheels. He then ties the creeper with wire to the bottom of the hoist in multiple directions. Ck/PLOP Wakey, Wakey, Mr. Cranky. You dont want to miss getting the shaft, do you? Plop stands over him with a lit torch, burning him to bring him around. The shot widens as he comes to. CLOSE-UP OF CK/PLOP CK/PLOP Thats a good mechanic, and we all know how hard you are to find. The mechanic struggles to no avail as CK/Plop walks over and releases the latch on the hoist. CK/Plop steps up on a stool. Overhead shot of the car falling to the floor and we hear a horrific PLOP! as blood spatters in all directions from under the car. CUT TO: INT. POLICE STATION interrogation room - DAY Scott and Trevor and Lou are still seated with Stacey, but the flip book is now closed. Joe comes to the door, offers a cursory knock and comes in with the hypodermic in a baggie. JOE Its confirmed. LOU Whats confirmed? JOE The substance in the hypodermic. It was cleaning fluid. If the killer had managed to get this in her arm, shed be dead. CLOSE-UP ON STACEY Who is horrified and overwhelmed by the knowledge she could have died. STACEY Oh, my God! LOU What are you doing with the hypodermic?! I asked you for a picture of John Belushi, damn it! JOE (defensively) Well, we got prints off the hypo, you know, so thats a good thing. Theyre running them through CODES (pronounced CODIS) right now. STACEY Whats CODES? LOU (to Stacey) Its a DNA profile database. If this costumed creep has ever done anything wrong in his life, hell be there. JOE We also got the results of the blood found at the Worlds Best and Only Breakfast Sushi Bar in Poxville. I think Chef Kenji nicked the assailant with his sushi knife, at least superficially. Weve got Type O, thats the chefs blood, and a Type A, which must belong to the assailant since no one else was hurt. There was enough of the assailants blood to run some panels to find out if theres anything wrong with the guy. 0002000006230002165F61D,LOU And? JOE It turns out hes got a rare blood disorder that makes him allergic to sugar. LOU Well, that should help single him out. JOE That, and he should have some kind of cuts on him somewhere that should be pretty easy to spot. ANGLE ON DOORWAY An investigative PR woman in a nicely-tailored, official-looking suit appears in the doorway. Her name is Fran Randall. Lou not only notices her but stands up, showing her a sign of respect obviously foreign to him in most situations. LOU Hi, Fran, whats up? FRAN Time to make a showing, guys. LOU A showing? FRAN The news media is descending on the CS-Eyepatch campsite and I think we need to lend an air of credibility to the coverage. (a beat) That, and get the word out that were looking for a serial killer. Trevor, Scott, Lou, and Stacey stand up. Lou puts his hand out to Stacey to suggest she is not included. TREVOR Come on, Lou. She should be there. Maybe the killer is a CS-Eyepatch groupie who hangs out around their campgrounds or something. I mean, you never know. LOU She was just complaining that shes having trouble giving us a physical description because we dont have any bee antennae in our flip book. CLOSE ON STACEY STACEY If hes there, I wont need the antennae. Ill know its him. CUT TO: EXT. CaMPFIRE IN WOODS setting Although there is no fire now since it is daylight, members from the press are crowded into the clearing, firing questions at the cast and crew. This is all ad-lib, where did you come up with the idea for CS-Eyepatch? How much fan mail does Sam Gruesome get, etc. 00020000060500021C7C5FF,ANGLE ON SIDE OF CLEARING Near CKs trailer. CK is sitting in the window, still eating the candy necklace, watching the proceedings. As Stacey, Fran, Trevor, Scott and Lou walk by CKs trailer, we lock in on the fact that... CLOSE-UP ON STACEY Stacey sees CK in the trailer window, eating her necklace. And... CLOSE-UP ON CK Who sees Staceys reaction and jumps away from the window. ANGLE ON STACEY As she grabs Scotts arm. The rest of the group sense the pull-back and grind to a halt. STACEY (to Scott in a hushed whisper) Thats him. ANGLE ON SCOTT Looking at CKs trailer. SCOTT Him who? STACEY (urgent) I just saw him. He was looking out the window of that trailer. SCOTT How do you know? I mean, you must have just seen him for a split second. STACEY He was eating my necklace. ANGLE ON GROUP This fact galvanizes Scott into action. He steps forward, pulls Trevor, Lou, and Fran to him, and he leads them around the... BACKSIDE OF CKS TRAILER Much the same area CK and Harry had their confrontation. CUT TO: EXT. CaMPFIRE IN WOODS setting Members of the press are still firing questions at the cast and crew. Cameramen are setting up for pictures and calling for shots, ad-libbing phrases such as, Desiree, over here! Look this way, please? CUT TO: EXT. CKs TRAILER - overview The real investigators/law enforcement are prepared to do their Cops routine; (music from Cops). One is positioned in the rear of the trailer, one at the side, one at the other side, as Lou goes up and knocks on the trailer door, then steps aside. 000200000ED80002227BED2,CUT TO: EXT. CaMPFIRE IN WOODS setting One member of the press and then a second member see what is ready to go down at CKs trailer. They begin to drift in that direction, quietly, unable to take their eyes off whats apparently ready to go down, and as they head that way, more and more people notice and follow them over, yet they hold back and do not interfere. CUT TO: EXT. CKs TRAILER close-up on front door Lou knocks again. Silence. Finally... LOU This is the police! Open up! ANGLE ON HARRY Stepping forward into the scene. (Cops music stops.) HARRY He cant open up, you fool! Hes locked in! ANGLE ON DOOR HANDLE/LOCK Lou tests it and finds it secure. LOU (to Harry) You locked this guy in his trailer? Why? Is he dangerous? Oohs and Ahhs spread through the crowd. John the director, who doesnt know what Harry knows, steps forward, taking responsibility. JOHN No, hes not friggin dangerous. Hes our costume designer. Oohs and Ahhs spread through the crowd at the key words costume designer. JOHN (frustrated) Hes harmless! John removes the keys from his pocket. JOHN (CONTD) Here, Ill show you. ACROSS THE CLEARING John approaches the trailer door, Lou steps aside, and John unlocks CKs trailer door from the outside. In barely enough time to register whats happening, CK, dressed as a frog, jumps out the front door and leaps off into the woods. Murmurs spread throughout the crowd, ad-libs like: its a frog? Isnt he supposed to dress up as cereal characters? What cereal uses a frog? And out of the murmuring rises the chant with each leap: ALL Dig em! Dig em Dig em! Dig em! Dig em Dig em! Dig em! Dig em Dig em! The law enforcement takes off after the frog into the woods. CUT TO: ext. SANITORIUM For Criminals - A COLD AND stormy EVENING A sterile hospital building is within walking distance of town. EXT. PARKING LOT NIGHT Dr. Kendra Bevy parks her car. TRACK KENDRA As she approaches the building, her high heels clacking on the asphalt. She carries a big briefcase. During her walk to the front, we see the following words on the screen... 13 MONTHS LATER CUT TO: INT. SANITORIUM For Criminals - A COLD AND stormy EVENING A bookish-looking doctor sits at his desk in his office, with disturbing pictures covering his walls. Dr. Bevy knocks on the doctors open door and steps into his office, but not very far. DR. BEVY Dr. Childress? Dr. Childress rises and walks over to her. She turns so that he can help her remove her wet coat, which he hangs on his coat rack. DR. CHILDRESS A pleasure to meet you, Kendra. DR. BEVY (ice cold) You can call me Dr. Bevy. REACTION SHOT OF DR. CHILDRESS As he reacts to Dr. Bevys obvious sense of self-importance. DR. CHILDRESS Very well, then, Dr. Bevy. Have a seat? DR. BEVY Im here to work, Dr. Childress. Can you take me to the interrogation room, now? REACTION SHOT OF DR. CHILDRESS Thought, but not heard ... DR. CHILDRESS What a bitch! DR. BEVY What did you say? Dr. childress I said, got an itch? To get started, I mean. CUT TO: INT. HALLWAYS Guards get CK out of his cell and walk him down the corridor. They reach the interrogation room where Dr. Bevy will question CK. INT. INTERROGATION ROOM Dr. Childress lets Dr. Bevy into the room and holds the chair for her. To the left of the table, a highly-reflective mirror slightly below waist-level offers a view of the room. Dr. Bevy spreads out paperwork from her briefcase on the table in front of her. ANGLE ON DOORWAY As CK is led in, wearing a ill-fitting straightjacket (his hands are kind of bundled up in front like he can get them together). CK still has the chain around his neck dangling to the floor. FULL INTERROGATION ROOM As CK is seated across from Dr. Bevy. Dr. Bevy motions the guards to get out. DR. BEVY You know who I am? 00020000089C0002314D896,CK Dr. Kendra Bevy. Yes, they told me you were coming to evaluate me. ANGLE ON CKS HANDS In straightjacket as he rustles them as silently and effortlessly as Houdini around below the edge of the high table. DR. BEVY And do you know why, CK? May I call you CK? INTERROGATION ROOM WINDOW CK glances left and sees OM standing next to her. CK (back to her) Sure. (a beat) Um, I imagine its because youre such a frigid bitch and you get what you want. ANGLE ON CKS HANDS A small pair of toenail scissors pokes through the cloth of the straightjacket below the table edge. DR. BEVY (bristling) No. I get results! That baby killer down in Tampa? (a beat) I got him to attack me within 5 minutes of our first session and I was able to shoot him point blank, justifiable homicide. ANGLE ON BRIEFCASE Dr. Bevy starts to unload an arsenal of guns, which she carefully arranges on the table like she previously arranged her paperwork. DR. BEVY (CONTD) That wife beater in Chicago who was deemed clinically insane? I got him to lunge at me 10 minutes into our first session when I shot him point blank. Between the eyes. (a beat) Justifiable homicide. (a beat) Are you afraid yet, CK? INTERROGATION ROOM WINDOW CK glances left and sees that OM is now joined by the victims of Bunny Man and Captain Munch in the room, all with oatmeal on them, dripping... ANGLE ON CKS HANDS He is creating a jagged hole with the toenail scissors now. CK No. DR. BEVY Well, you should be. (a beat) That homophobic maniac who killed 18 gay men up and down the west coast over a period of 2 years? It only took me 2 minutes to get him so pissed off. He knocked the table over and I shot him... (a beat) Where it counts. Before I shot him right between the eyes! (a beat) I suppose you want to tell me now about your horrid childhood, how you suffered at the hands of your mother, how no one understood you, how bullies beat you up on your way to and from school, how you were violated emotionally, physically, and spiritually every way possible before you were even 8 years old. I suppose youre going to tell me either A, that you hear voices or B, that you see things, or C, that you both hear voices AND see things. 000200000723000239E371D,(a beat) Am I even close, Mr. Rabbit turned Admiral turned Tiger turned Elf turned Honey Bee turned Snappy, Crackles, and Plop? Well, am I? ANGLE ON CKS HANDS He has freed not one but both hands through the fabric now beneath the table. CK Well, no. INTERROGATION ROOM WINDOW CK glances left and sees that OM is joined by the victims of Bunny Man, Admiral Munch, Tiger, Elf, and Count Strawbula all dripping with oatmeal. But the prostitute Count Strawbula killed is standing closer to him than the others. DR. BEVY No?! CK You forgot Count Strawbula. DR. BEVY Ah, yes, Count Strawbula. She pulls a folder out from among the others and looks inside it, not showing it to him. DR. BEVY The most Freudian of all your murders. How much imagination do you need to steal a hearse, pick up a hooker, and drown her in cereal and milk that turns sickly reddish-like blood when you pour it on? Was that sexy to you? Did it turn you on? CK Well, yes. DR. BEVY But theres one thing that puzzles me about one of your murders... one that you havent wanted to talk about that much precisely because it IS so significant. (a beat) Your mother. CUT TO: CK RE-EXPERIENCING THE MURDER THROUGH FLASHBACK INT. CKS CHILDHOOD HOME - bedroom - DAY CK packs his suitcases in the bedroom of his youth, decorated with nerdy toys and posters. His suitcase is open on the bed. The packing by CK and the unpacking by his Mom, who replaces CKs items with oatmeal goodies, is the same as it was the first time we saw it, with a twist. During the action, CK now tells the story more completely than he did the first time around. CK (v.O.) Being hired by CS-Eyepatch was a defining moment in my life which signified the turning of a corner onto a new street. I would never again return to my first home, my old neighborhood, or my old haunts again. 0002000006E9000241006E3,(a beat) As I packed my suitcase and my mother unpacked my items to replace them with the dreadful oatmeal crap, I felt my rage begin to build. Would she always be dictating what I ate, where I went, what I did, who I saw? Would she always be two steps behind me, needing something from me but never offering anything in return? (a beat) I could not, I WOULD not, let her ruin my life this time. I took my sharpest sewing shears from my bottom drawer, the razor sharp pair that was more a weapon I had fashioned for myself than anything used to cut fabric and I... We see CK take the scissors out of the drawer, rush across the room, stab his mother in the chest once so that she falls, and then, once she has fallen, repeatedly stab her viciously in the chest. CK (V.O.) (quieter) Well, I made sure she would never run, or ruin, my life from that point forward. Cut TO: FULL INTERROGATION ROOM The air is thick with tension. DR. BEVY So it all comes down to cereal. CK Well, yes, it does. DR. BEVY Yes, yes, I read all about it, how your mother only fed you oatmeal, how you resented that and wanted to be like other kids. Do bore me with more, CK. Ive had a year to study your file while Dr. Childress has done nothing but coddle you. INTERROGATION ROOM WINDOW CK glances left and sees that OM is joined by the victims of Bunny Man, Captain Munch, Tiger, Elf, Count Strawbula, and Snappy, Crackles and Plop, all dripping with oatmeal. CK But its all true. DR. BEVY Whats true? CK Everything you said, everything I went through. DR. BEVY Well, poor, poor, CK. I feel so sorry for you. What an amazing pity party youve thrown for yourself. (a beat) Did you ever stop and consider...getting OVER it?! Maybe taking an anger management class? Growing a spine?! 000200000F17000247E3F11,ANGLE ON CK - HIS REALITY As his most significant victim, his mother, leans in dripping wads of oatmeal on him. OM Kill the slut! FULL INTERROGATION ROOM Dr. Bevy leans forward, tense, her hand ready to grab the nearest gun. CK sees that Dr. Bevy notices the increase in his tension and instead of bursting forward, he sits back in his chair, his freed hands still carefully hidden from view, and takes on a considerably calmer tone. In fact, he laughs. CK And what about your anger management, doctor? ANGLE ON DR. BEVY He has pushed a button here. INTERROGATION ROOM WINDOW CK glances left and sees all his victims silently waiting, watching. Om Shell kill you if you do or dont. CK I mean, dont you think its kind of sick, goading mentally ill inmates to attack you so you can kill them? (scoffs) Justifiable homicide. (laughs louder, speaks harshly) What makes your actions any better than mine? ANGLE ON CK - HIS REALITY OM leans in, more oatmeal falling from her hair and face. OM If you only do one last thing for me, kill this bitch! FULL INTERROGATION ROOM CK (aloud to OM) Not today, mom. Its my rage, and Ill own it! Dr. Bevy reacts to this puzzling statement spoken aloud to Om and is thus caught off-guard. CK rolls left and kicks the table so that he up-ends it. Dr. Bevy goes sprawling on the floor, guns and paperwork scattered everywhere. He rips his straightjacket further, grabs the chair he has been sitting on, The guards in the next room go to the monitor to see what is going on. CK crashes through the door with the chair and drops it into the two push handles locking the door from the outside. By now, Dr. Bevy has her hands on a gun and is firing crazily after him as she ties to leave CK pushes a cabinet over in the hall and wedges it between the door and the wall, grabbing an additional stand to fill the gap. While Dr. Bevy pick up a automatic weapon and fires it at the door. The bullets start ricocheting around the room. Her reaction stops her from firing. EXT. SANITORIUM For Criminals - A COLD AND stormy EVENING CK is running, running, running. He stops at the edge of the parking lot and looks back at the building. It is quiet, not a sound. CK (V.O.) Just like that night at the high school, no one was coming after me now. (a beat) Perhaps they were all temporarily stunned that Dr. Bevy didnt get the job of eradicating one more monster accomplished before the sun came up. EXT. THE ROADS, THE VIEW CK stands there, overlooking the parking lot to the left and the road to the right and a hillside straight ahead. CK walks to a bank of trees and moves some leave. His now-famous duffle bag is wedged there between two large rocks in a plastic bag. CK (aloud) Thanks, Harry. We watch CK free the bag, pull out his duffle, open his duffle, and pull out an Elvis costume, dark glasses and a wig. CUT TO: EXT. ROADS CK/Elvis has his thumb out on a long desert road at the top of a hill. A convertible filled with girls passes and they hoot and holler but they do not slow down. CK/Elvis looks to the side to see a sign marked, Las Vegas, 235 miles. CK (V.O.) Most killers make the mistake of having whats called a signature, a style that marks them and their work. Too many of them never change their M.O. And they get caught. Then, when they do get caught, too many of them never get a second chance. (a beat) Me, I was either lucky or smart enough to realize this, or maybe a little of both. (a beat) Ive heard that most people refer to their lean times as their salad days. Me, I chose cereal. Maybe now it was a good time to change up, advance, get ahead, make a fresh start, beginning with... (a beat) A nice big cholesterol-packed breakfast... in Vegas. EXT. ROADWAY A car pulls over and from a distance we see CK lean in and talk to the driver. He gets in the car, and the car drives away. END 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BEVYWoman 2 Dr. childressFLAPJACKMan 2FRANWoman 2HARRYMan 2HOGirl 2IDA Old WomanJOEOld ManJOHNBoy 1Large prisonerMan 1LOUMan 2LYDIA Old WomanMANMan 2MOM Old WomanMooMan 2Mousey prisonerBoy 1NEWSMANOld Man POLICEMAN 1Man 1 Policeman 2Man 2 ProperietorOld ManRAT TRAPBoy 2REDheadWoman 2RichterBoy 1SAMMan 2SCOTTMan 2 SIZZLING CHEFMan 2STACEYWoman 1TREVORMan 2VICKYGirl 1 VO WAITRESS ANNGirl 2WOMANWoman 2CK/Plop OmMAN VO$sTCE (V.O.) (O.S.) (O.C.) (SUBTITLE)(C (V.O.]%sTTR CUT TO: FADE IN: FADE OUT. FADE TO: DISSOLVE TO: BACK TO: MATCH CUT TO: JUMP CUT TO:FADE TO BLACK./osTSI=INTEXTI/E ESC1 BURBANKHALLOWEEN & MONSTERSSTARBUCK-AND-A-HALF KITCHENCK'S CHILDHOOD HOME AIRSTREAM MAILBOX SHACKINT MAILBOX SHACKCGI DUSTY ROADSC.S. EYEPATCH TRAILER LAB MOO'S OFFICE)%BRIDGE OVER A RUNNING RIVER OR STREAM SCOTT'S POVFULL ROOM SHOTNOTE: THE NEXT TRAILER TRASH CS EYEPATCH SCRIPT WILL BE THE TOPIC THAT GOES HERE BUT I HAVE ALREADY WRITTEN BEYOND IT WITH CK, SO I WILL LEAVE THIS HERE AS A MARKER.1-THE ONLY BREAKFAST SUSHI BAR KNOWN TO MANKINDDESIREE'S MOTORHOMEANGLE ON DESIREE TRAILERTHE OUTDOORS NEAR TRAILER THE CAMPFIRE DISCO WORLD DARK ALLEY BINGO HALLBINGO HALL HALLWAY STALLPARKING LOT NIGHT STREETS NIGHTWOODED AREA WITH REST STOP HEARSETRAILER MORNINGBACK OF TRAILER MORNING!FULL SHOT OF LOT WITH TRAILERCLOSE UP ON BAGGIES'#CLOSE UP ON FACE MAKEUP JAR IN HAND WITHOUT SOUND MUSIC TRAILERCGI DIRECTOR'S TRAILERLOCATION MANAGER'S VEHICLEFORENSICS LAB TRAILER CK'S TRAILERCAMPFIRE IN WOODSBACK ALLEY ENTRANCE DOORALLEY OUTSIDE GYMBACK OF CK'S TRAILERBEHIND CK'S TRAILERTHE THICK OF THE WOODSPOLICE STATIONGROCERY STORE PARKING LOT HOTEL DAYMECHANIC'S WORKSHOPJOESAME MORNING, SAME PLACE$ LOU AT FIRST CRIME SCENE (BUNNY)CAMPFIRE IN WOODS SETTING'#CK'S TRAILER CLOSE-UP ON FRONT DOOR SANITORIUMSANITORIUM OFFICE HALLWAYSSANITORIUM PARKING LOTTHE ROADS, THE VIEW ROADS ROADWAYMEN'S REST ROOM DARKENED ROOM%!VALLEY GIRLS TOTALLY COOL FABRICS%!POLICE STATION INTERROGATION ROOM0sTSTV DAY NIGHT AFTERNOON MORNING EVENING LATER MOMENTS LATER CONTINUOUS THE NEXT DAYDARKENED ROOMDAY NIGHTFALL SAME NIGHTA COLD AND RAINY EVENINGCVmCRO9INTINT. Scene Heading01119EXTEXT. Scene Heading01128I/EI/E Scene Heading0113@DAY - DAY Scene HeadingAction0114DNIGHT - NIGHT Scene HeadingAction0115HSUNRISE - SUNRISE Scene HeadingAction0116DMAGIC - MAGIC Scene HeadingAction0117GCONT continuing ParentheticalDialogue0118JINTER interrupting ParentheticalDialogue0119$0110GCUTTOCUT TO: Transition Scene Heading1111EFADEINFADE IN:Action Scene Heading1112KFADEOUT FADE OUT. Transition Scene Heading1113IFADETOFADE TO: Transition Scene Heading1114MDISSLV DISSOLVE TO: Transition Scene Heading1115IBACKTOBACK TO: Transition Scene Heading1116PMATCHCUT MATCH CUT TO: Transition Scene Heading1117NJUMPCUT JUMP CUT TO: Transition Scene Heading1118BFBLACKFADE TO BLACK. Transition1119$000 HFFFF000000060002000177AA00000000004F0000000020001101-7F7C6F000480048-20F0-10 F264FFFF0102000010000003200000001038405AF20A20388000203F20A0000200000007000000003,[].00040000000C00000003023530005000000090000000201500006000000EE0000000430C30FFFF0C00000 10 10930FFFF0C00000 20 10C201020040FFFF0C00000 1043E3A00121D325C010930FFFF0C00000 10438B900 00070000003800000002010180205A0 101800008000001690000000240,System40,Courier104014E440007014000100000011640,Courier Final Draft40,Courier104070114E4070101000000116000900000005000000020000A00000013000000020F2640F264000B00000005000000020000C0000000A0000000101000F0000005500000000400 10 104,04,14,04,C004,14,438B4,00130000007E00000000DA91F8CE1C1D1E1F7F1B044,-..'"FFFF0FFFF0012800000009000000015001290000000900000001500014000000AC000000001D325C5C1AE204211D326002C,E,42,>Page #!j?Q!FFFE000000060002000177AADhFFFF000000060002000177AA00000000004B0000000020001101-7F7C6F000480048-20C0-10 C264FFFF01000010000003100000001018405AC20A038E000203C20A0000200000005000000001, 0004000000090000000201300005000000090000000201300006000000640000000210C30FFFF0C00000 10 10930FFFF0C00000 30 00070000003800000002010180205A0 101800008000001690000000240,System40,Courier104014E440007014000100000011640,Courier Final Draft40,Courier104070114E4070101000000116000900000005000000020000A00000013000000020C2640C264000B00000005000000020000C0000000A0000000101000F0000005500000000400 10 104,04, 4,x|4,4,4,4,00130000007E00000000DA91F8CE1C1D1E1F7F1B044,-..'"FFFF0FFFF001280000000900000001300129000000090000000130FFFE000000060002000177AADDzrVIS+First Revision*,Second Revision*+Third Revision*,Fourth Revision*.EsNTE! Important!# Information?" Suggestion*?Courier Final Draft (MORE)(cont'd) (CONTINUED) CONTINUED:aCTR@ Man 1HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SOFTWARE\Microsoft\Speech\Voices\Tokens\MSMike=Man 2(`]DVۉ}PWoman 1HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SOFTWARE\Microsoft\Speech\Voices\Tokens\MSMaryWoman 2HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SOFTWARE\Microsoft\Speech\Voices\Tokens\MSMary=Boy 1(`Q|g({DESTۉ}P=Boy 2(ԑPO|u`ۉ}P>Girl 1(pQ|g({DESTۉ}P>Girl 2(ԑPO|u`ۉ}P?Old Man(`]DVۉ}PA Old Woman(pQ|g({DESTۉ}P GENERAL SCENE HEADING ACTION CHARACTER PARENTHETICALDIALOGUE TRANSITION SHOTk1Arial W?Courier Final Draft 6 Cast List.  - MFFFF000000060002000177AA00000000005D0000000020001101-777C6F000480048-25F2E720075-10E5D2E72C1FFFF010C000010000003D0000000101118405FA52E7279105038E0002DBA52E7F9000020000011700000000111, (Name of Project) by (Name of First Writer) (Based on, If Any) Revisions by (Names of Subsequent Writers, in Order of Work Performed) Current Revisions by (Current Writer, date) Name (of company, if applicable) Address Phone Number00040000000B000000020111310005000000150000000401142D8111300006000000640000000210C30FFFF0C00000 10 10930FFFF0C00000 30 00070000005400000003010180480 2018010480 101800008000001690000000240,System40,Courier104014E440007014000100000011640,Courier Final Draft40,Courier104070114E4070101000000116000900000005000000020000A0000001B00000002E5D3262C1E5D3262C1000B00000005000000020000C0000001300000001CF9201C01000F000000590000000050E010 104,77A4,4,77A4,4,um4,[z4,[].00130000007E00000000DA91F8CE1C1D1E1F7F1B044,-..'"FFFF0FFFF001280000000B00000001113001290000000B000000011130FFFE000000060002000177AAD f HFFFF000000060002000177AA00000000004F0000000020001101-7F7C6F000480048-20F0-10 F264FFFF0102000010000003200000001038405AF20A20388000203F20A0000200000007000000003,[].00040000000C00000003023530005000000090000000201500006000000EE0000000430C30FFFF0C00000 10 10930FFFF0C00000 20 10C201020040FFFF0C00000 1043E3A00121D326C010930FFFF0C00000 10438B900 00070000003800000002010180205A0 101800008000001690000000240,System40,Courier104014E440007014000100000011640,Courier Final Draft40,Courier104070114E4070101000000116000900000005000000020000A00000013000000020F2640F264000B00000005000000020000C0000000A0000000101000F0000005500000000400 10 104,77A4,4,t4,014,F204,~4,:00130000007E00000000DA91F8CE1C1D1E1F7F1B044,-..'"FFFF0FFFF0012800000009000000015001290000000900000001500014000000AC000000001D326C5C1AE204211D327002C,E,42,>Page #1\!j?Q1\!FFFE000000060002000177AADhFFFF000000060002000177AA00000000004B0000000020001101-7F7C6F000480048-20C0-10 C264FFFF01000010000003100000001018405AC20A038E000203C20A0000200000005000000001, 0004000000090000000201300005000000090000000201300006000000640000000210C30FFFF0C00000 10 10930FFFF0C00000 30 00070000003800000002010180205A0 101800008000001690000000240,System40,Courier104014E440007014000100000011640,Courier Final Draft40,Courier104070114E4070101000000116000900000005000000020000A00000013000000020C2640C264000B00000005000000020000C0000000A0000000101000F0000005500000000400 10 104,77A4,~4,04,14,04,04,100130000007E00000000DA91F8CE1C1D1E1F7F1B044,-..'"FFFF0FFFF001280000000900000001300129000000090000000130FFFE000000060002000177AADQ6$$